Shit Next Door Neighbours

I did once booby trap my own trampoline a few years back. The people next door used to get pissed then hop the fence when they thought we'd gone to bed. I set the whole thing up to be sturdy enough to get onto but collapse on the first bounce. It was funny watching the pair of them hobble about pretending they'd fell over in the house.
 


KeefBeer said:
The little old lady next door semi died a couple of years ago and we worried who we would get when her family stuck it up for sale.
Used to watch everyone coming to view it just in case we had to turn up the hifi and start shouting if they seemed dodgy.
No need to have worried, down-sizing divorcee moved in.
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Same happened at the top of our st ,right shit bag moved in .
 
ChrisAshley said:
Currently got a Syrian family next door to us who are canny enough even if they seem to get a bit aggressive with each other every now and then also the old man constantly hammering and sawing away in the garden anytime there's a bit of sun gets a bit annoying. They seem to try to integrate too, put christmas decorations up, send christmas cards and currently have England flags up.

Oh just remembered the kid always wears a Newcastle top, ship the fuckers back!
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Sounds like they might be Christians mate.
 
MackneyHackem said:
Honestly man. I'm going to do a drawing of what they did and hoy it up, giz a second...

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They also wrote on the bottom that as a thank you for letting them do it, they'd redecorate the hallway and "put up a nice big mirror" to make sure we didn't lose any light.
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Were those plans drawn up by the same architect who designed our sinking, unexpanding rope bridge??
 
I suspect I'm a shit neighbour. I'm in an upstairs flat but the floorboards are horrific. Walking between sitting room to bedroom across the landing you've virtually got to walk across tip-toe or jump across a certain area of the floor unless it sounds (to me) like an elephant crossing the landing. Only certain parts of the floor are affected and make the racket before you all accuse me of being a fat kernt. :lol:
 
One side of ours is an old couple never see them or hear them, always take parcels in for us no bother.

Other side are absolute fruit loops. They have access through my back yard and they always either leave the gate open or unlocked I'm sure they've either lost the key or are trying to wind me up.

He's obsessed by DIY and his hedge. She's just tapped in the head. They have 2 big dogs who just bark constant, even me walking up the stairs sets them off and then they start knocking on my door telling me to be quiet , f*cking control the beasts then!

Boyfriend accidentally set them off barking the other night on his way out to work, so she let them out in the front garden to bark at him they ran up to their gate jumped up and broke it. We both burst out laughing and she had to come to the gate and dragged them back inside. Then as soon as I'd gone back in she went out to retrieve the bit of gate I'd kicked up the street.

They not just like that with me one of the other neighbors told me they used to leave notes on her boyfriends old banger advising him to take his junk to get scrapped as it was showing the street up:lol::lol:

oROSSo said:
just received a snapchat from my mates wife who filmed her neighbour cutting the front lawn with scissors!
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Definitely something mine would do
 
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We were doing the last house up to sell on. It was in a f***ing really nice sr6 area as well. Anyway the lad came in saying the neighbours out the back called him swear words when him and his mates were out just being kids, kicking footies about and laughing and whatnot. I was f***ing fuming and all ready to go round but our lass said do fuck all because we're selling it and we have to disclose and shenanigans if it gets out of hand so I bit my lip. They said it happened a few times so I kept watch as we never had any bother when adults were present when they were being noisy little twats.

Anyway I was at the bottom of the garden behind a big tree doing a bit gardening (out of their view) when he came out to play, He picked up a penny floater and booted it against our extension which was about 30 yards from them. I immediately heard them shout shut the fuck up you little c**t. I went straight to the shed, grabbed a casey and started booting it full force against our shared fence offering them the opportunity to call me a noisy c**t.


About 10 seconds later the windows started shutting in the house and the lights went off.

They got no more shit but I did hear the fat wife screaming at her husband and kid a few times before we left.

Awful people, I don't say this lightly but I hope she's dead...
 
Lovely neighbours either side here, it's lovely and quiet in the street, plus on these lovely summer afternoons and evenings its only been us out in the garden having our meals outside, a bbq or a quiet glass of wine before bed.


But I've told this story on here before, the family that have the garden backing on to ours at the bottom , the wife is lovely but the husband is an ignorant bastard when we first moved in I tried to smile and say hello if he was out in the garden and I was hanging out washing or whatever but no he can "blank" people for England. So fair enough I've given up (I'm quick on the uptake and can take a hint). However though when the bairn was a toddler when the ignorant neighbour didn't respond to his waving and saying hello, he even resorted to saying "hola" as the bairn thought the ignorant fecker couldn't understand English!! :lol:bless him.
 
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KeefBeer said:
Not a problem from any of my neighbours probably because we are all 50+
But because I'm retired every Amazon, Parcel Force etc driver know I'll take in deliveries, one neighbour told me he had stuck me down as his alternative address cheeky basa.
Always give the boxes a good shake, tell my wife Sharon across the street seems to have ordered a 12inch brutaliser dildo,
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Do that to my neighbour quite a bit tbf. He took so many parcels last Christmas I felt bad so took him round a slab of beer as a thank you.
 
KarenDent said:
Lovely neighbours either side here, it's lovely and quiet in the street, plus on these lovely summer afternoons and evenings its only been us out in the garden having our meals outside, a bbq or a quiet glass of wine before bed.


But I've told this story on here before, the family that have the garden backing on to ours at the bottom , the wife is lovely but the husband is an ignorant bastard when we first moved in I tried to smile and say hello if he was out in the garden and I was hanging out washing or whatever but no he can "blank" people for England. So fair enough I've given up (I'm quick on the uptake and can take a hint). However though when the bairn was a toddler when the ignorant neighbour didn't respond to his waving and saying hello, he even resorted to saying "hola" as the bairn thought the ignorant fecker couldn't understand English!! :lol:bless him.
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I seriously don't get people like that, we had next door neighbours in a house we moved out years ago that would pretty much blank us if we saw them out and about, the fence was too high to see them out the back to say hello so it wasn't really an issue in day to day life. The mad thing is they greeted us like family when we moved out. we were paranoid as fuck thinking we were we the neighbours from hell (pre kids one dog) until the couple that bought it off us had the exact same bother with them?

My theory was they were into some weird sex shit and thought we could hear them screaming in a combination of ecstasy and pain, our lass says they're probably just mega shy and didn't want to interact with people on a daily basis :lol:

Falconhoof said:
:eek::lol::lol::lol:
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Seriously I'm getting proper annoyed thinking about the fat f***ing witch and her biscuit arsed window closing wanker of a husband right now. :evil::lol:
 
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