Leaving a light on when you go out

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I got burgled once when the wife and I were sleeping. Next day a copper called to say they'd arrested the burglar, so I asked for his name and address so I could go round and see him.

The copper replied that I'd be able to see him in court so I said “I only want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying to do that for years!”
 
The King of Um said:
My mam and dad were sick of big phone bills so they got a lock for the phone dial. As soon as they were out I searched the house and found the key. One quarter later, another big phone bill came in, and I'm all,"I wonder how that can be because it's clearly not me." Looking back, I'm probably lucky I didn't accidentally end their marriage in a sea of suspicion of each other having an affair.
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Anyone remember heavy breathers ?

you would come in from school and every now and then your mam/aunt/ganny would say “I’ve had a heavy breather on the phone today”
 
Gillythedilf said:
Anyone remember heavy breathers ?

you would come in from school and every now and then your mam/aunt/ganny would say “I’ve had a heavy breather on the phone today”
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Good call, was a big thing. Everyone had them at some point, jokes on the telly etc. Never hear of them now.

They disappeared about the same time as white dog shit. One for the conspiracy theorists.
 
dangermows said:
Does that really stop people attempting to burgle your gaff?
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Thing I worry about is if your out and leave a light on, if someone knocks and you dont answer, then its an advert that no ones in.

Bit like them ring door bells, you answer and say sorry no ones in, then they know to rob you
 
becs said:
Anyone still remove the car radio and take it with them?
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I got a Clarion Stereo fitted in my xr2i that had a removable front. Parked the car next to the ivy house and some twat bent the driver's door back took the Stereo ( without the front)and all my CDs. Next day went to Tony's audios and I was amazed he had the same stereo without the front! Utter twats
 
Gillythedilf said:
Used to live with me ganny a lot when I was young .She would leave the light on with the wireless if they went out on a night,she would also shout “TARA!!” Back into the house as she was shutting the door .To make on someone was in the house :lol:
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I still do that now.

I also stick the sound of a dog barking on Alexa.
 
Nukehasslefan said:
You have been massively lucky in that respect.
My wife's left the front door key in on a few occasions.
A young kid knocked at the door to tell her she'd left them in.

One night when we all went to bed the front door had blown open. It can't have latched properly.
We got up to find our dog (at the time....border collie/german shepherd cross) sitting at the bottom of the stairs just looking out. Basically either guarding it or contemplating doing a runner but not having the bottle, which was weird when you consider he took any opportunity to take flight if someone opened the door while he was behind them and we'd have to trawl the streets to catch up with the git.

But he was a good house dog and guard dog.
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I've done that before went to lock the front door at night and couldnt find keys was looking all over for them for ages.

Turns out that I left them in the front door when got home from work. Car keys were on them too luckily I didn't hear my car screetching down street.
 
“Alexa, tell Burglar Deterrent to sound like the living room”

Will replicate living room noises when your out.

The kitchen one is OK but sounds like a commercial kitchen washing up 100 pans.
 
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