Depression thread continued...

[CPLforever]

Mine was for my anxiety and panic attacks. I was on the ceiling two to three days before I was due to go and was taking propranolol just to get out of the house because the panic attacks were so bad. I just couldn’t keep doing it, I felt like it was making it worse. When I took the decision to stop I honestly felt like a massive weight had been lifted.

I have like this at my one to one, dreading it for days in advance then feeling like a wet rag afterwards. Have you thought about group. I have done this as well and even tho I thought I wouldn't like it I did. Group was more about learning techniques to cope mind more than root causes but asDB star said those grounding techniques do give you breathing time and space.

 

[Amber]

I have like this at my one to one, dreading it for days in advance then feeling like a wet rag afterwards. Have you thought about group. I have done this as well and even tho I thought I wouldn't like it I did. Group was more about learning techniques to cope mind more than root causes but asDB star said those grounding techniques do give you breathing time and space.

Ah cpl I’m sorry you feel like that too, it’s awful. They didn’t offer me it and truthfully I don’t think I would cope with that either. I’ve been given lots of info which I am using, especially the 4 2 6 breathing, I find that does calm me down. I get so frustrated with myself because I know it’s my brain that’s causing the physical symptoms. I know this sounds barmy but when I get an attack I do this swallowing thing because I feel like my throat is closing up, so I swallow, swallow, swallow to make sure it’s not then I get to the point where I can’t swallow and I honestly feel like I’m going to die. Therapist said what would happen if you couldn’t swallow would you die? I said no but I feel like I’m going to. So I’ve tried to stop it but it’s so ingrained it’s hard not to.

I can imagine that could cause a loop. Sometimes we can stabilise then deal with the causes. I've had to learn grounding techniques in therapy. I can only imagine how bad persistent panic attacks are as I've always had a tendency to disassociate instead. Not sure if that is fortunate or unfortunate, because you can't make sound decision when you're disassociated and I've made some absolutely terrible decisions through those periods

I think being disassociated sounds just as bad as panic attacks to be honest. They both has such a huge impact on your life.

 

[BILLY BUS PASS]

Ah cpl I’m sorry you feel like that too, it’s awful. They didn’t offer me it and truthfully I don’t think I would cope with that either. I’ve been given lots of info which I am using, especially the 4 2 6 breathing, I find that does calm me down. I get so frustrated with myself because I know it’s my brain that’s causing the physical symptoms. I know this sounds barmy but when I get an attack I do this swallowing thing because I feel like my throat is closing up, so I swallow, swallow, swallow to make sure it’s not then I get to the point where I can’t swallow and I honestly feel like I’m going to die. Therapist said what would happen if you couldn’t swallow would you die? I said no but I feel like I’m going to. So I’ve tried to stop it but it’s so ingrained it’s hard not to.

I think being disassociated sounds just as bad as panic attacks to be honest. They both has such a huge impact on your life.

Something you said makes perfect sense to me ………. Ya head will fukk you up if you let it, just got to find Proppa ways to get relaxed or give yourself time to gather yourself but don’t avoid situations as ya brain will fukk you up even more if you do.
Breathing techniques and mediation definitely helped me.

I’m no expert mind just relaying what I learned from adult speech therapy session's I did will be 20 years ago now. Feels like a life time ago as far as that is concerned but these techniques definitely helped. I’m not “cured” but I don’t get the dreaded panic when going into a shop or on a bus or into a strange pub and having to speak to new people.
The creeping death in meetings where you have to introduce yourself is still a killer but I can usually calm myself and get composed.
Ya brain is a bastard and definitely not your friend if you let it be.

 

[Amber]

Something you said makes perfect sense to me ………. Ya head will fukk you up if you let it, just got to find Proppa ways to get relaxed or give yourself time to gather yourself but don’t avoid situations as ya brain will fukk you up even more if you do.
Breathing techniques and mediation definitely helped me.

I’m no expert mind just relaying what I learned from adult speech therapy session's I did will be 20 years ago now. Feels like a life time ago as far as that is concerned but these techniques definitely helped. I’m not “cured” but I don’t get the dreaded panic when going into a shop or on a bus or into a strange pub and having to speak to new people.
The creeping death in meetings where you have to introduce yourself is still a killer but I can usually calm myself and get composed.
Ya brain is a bastard and definitely not your friend if you let it be.

I feel like I’m at war with it, my brain, a lot of the time. You are spot on with what you’ve said. I used to go to skinny pigs and loved it then one session I had a huge panic attack and had to ring my mam to calm me down
I couldn’t go back, I tried but my brain was now on full alert and telling me that this place was dangerous and the fight or flight kicked in as soon as I walked through the doors. I know the science or whatever you want to call it behind it yet I can’t control it. Omg I feel for you about the having to introduce yourself, I stopped going to slimming world because I couldn’t bear the wait until she got to me to ask how I had been doing that week, I was actually sweating waiting for it and my stomach churning. So I do avoid situations now, I avoid things that I know will set one off, your world becomes much smaller

 

[BILLY BUS PASS]

Believe me and I’m not trying to tell you what to do here but once you avoid a situation it makes it ten times worse.
Have you ever looked at anyone with a stammer they often have many ticks or twitches ?? That’s because that once helped them get their words out but then one day it doesn’t work but by then it has become part of their routine.
I remember the therapist in one of my early sessions she said do you change words mid sentence and I said “yes it’s the English language there are many words to fit a situation” I can still see her shaking her head, she said your mind is racing all over the place to avoid things you’ve had trouble le with in the past, we have got to undo 40 years of bad habits and practices here.
Breathing and meditation really helped me for a couple of years I did relaxation every night before bed now if I feel my mind racing ahead I just take the time to calm down. Once you know what calm feels like it’s kind of easy to know when you are there ……… if that makes sense.
It will be a constant thing in my life but it is something in the last 20 years is less and less of an issue.
I know everyone is different but it took me time to apply myself to try to do something about it and it’s one of them best things I did.

 

[Amber]

Believe me and I’m not trying to tell you what to do here but once you avoid a situation it makes it ten times worse.
Have you ever looked at anyone with a stammer they often have many ticks or twitches ?? That’s because that once helped them get their words out but then one day it doesn’t work but by then it has become part of their routine.
I remember the therapist in one of my early sessions she said do you change words mid sentence and I said “yes it’s the English language there are many words to fit a situation” I can still see her shaking her head, she said your mind is racing all over the place to avoid things you’ve had trouble le with in the past, we have got to undo 40 years of bad habits and practices here.
Breathing and meditation really helped me for a couple of years I did relaxation every night before bed now if I feel my mind racing ahead I just take the time to calm down. Once you know what calm feels like it’s kind of easy to know when you are there ……… if that makes sense.
It will be a constant thing in my life but it is something in the last 20 years is less and less of an issue.
I know everyone is different but it took me time to apply myself to try to do something about it and it’s one of them best things I did.

I really appreciate your thoughts on this, thank you. I know you are right and I have to work harder on it

 

[D.A]

Saw this on Facebook.

ATTENTION ALL MEN

If you are Male, over 16 and suffering with Mental Health Issues please join us today. You no longer have to feel alone, there is a place for you to turn.

The Man Cave is my online help and support group for Men of all ages who struggle with Mental Health Issues. The reason I set this up was because 7 years ago I got diagnosed with PTSD, depression and anxiety. I’ve lived it, I’ve been through it, I’ve felt it all and seen the way it can rip a human being apart, I’ve been broken beyond words and even wanted to end it all. I’ve watched it hurt people around me too. I’ve felt how alone it makes you feel, how embarrassed it makes you feel to open up and talk and how you feel you are not worthy or deserving of a normal life. After a lot of hard work on myself I’ve been one of the lucky ones and come through the darkest of tunnels and the fight of my life. I wanted to do something to help others, I am not trying to be a counsellor but I have experience and a survival guide that may help others see the same light in the tunnel as I have. I want to help and genuinely believe this group has the potential to do that. The group is non judgemental, safe and completely private and I would love as many men as possible to join. The stigma around men suffering is a disgrace, men are allowed to suffer too, it’s ok to not be ok and I want to raise more awareness on this. The male suicide rate is so high too and we need to help stop men just becoming a statistic because the help wasn’t there. I’m looking to grow this as big as possible and help and support those who really want and need it.

Come and be part of our brotherhood of over 3500 Men and start your healing journey.

Stu

You must be logged on to see external links

 

[BILLY BUS PASS]

I really appreciate your thoughts on this, thank you. I know you are right and I have to work harder on it

Working harder on it sounds like putting more pressure on yourself …………… just approach it differently that’s all …..if you want to that is.

 

[FifeMackem95]

Embarrassingly posted this in the wrong thread so some may have seen however please see below…

Evening, a quick one from me for this thread. Never been in this part of RTG so bear with me.

Maybe I’m out of turn mentioning depression as it’s a serious issue, however I’m unsure how else to classify my current state. Hating social interaction, always low mood, hate facing the world on a morning and generally just cynical about a lot of things (strangely, apart from SAFC!). I’m very lucky in the fact that in most of my life I’m in a good position (eg, engaged with a wedding coming up next year, good circle of friends etc) but I simply can’t get out of the habit of negative thinking, seeing the worst in everything and many other things that I simply struggle to articulate to anyone and struggle with independently. The only time I’m (genuinely and truly) happy is when I’m on the beers with friends. Hence the 3am message (feel pathetic tbh but this message is the first step of trying to move towards improving things for myself).

Struggling with the above in accompaniment with my health issue that is chronic fatigue syndrome. I do speak to people and my immediate family are obviously aware but I really don’t feel like anyone is truly aware of my attitude/feelings. A big struggle is getting people to understand this.

Appreciate the above is a lot and quite serious (to me anyway, and yes I absolutely love putting stuff in brackets) but don’t really have anywhere else to express my feelings and this forum seems appropriate with understanding members (apart from if you say Soeakman is canny and Keith Downie just does his job ).

But as per above, I completely accept I’m very fortunate and a million miles away from some of the true struggles people face. I have that perspective but still struggle. Any thoughts/advice from anyone that’s reading this would be appreciated so much.

I (do not) look forward to the fear of waking up and seeing I’ve actually put my feelings out there. Appreciate any messages I receive in advance, negative or positive.

Haway the lads.

Hope I don’t seem as if I’m feeling sorry for myself and licking any wounds

 

[Becs]

Struggling with the above in accompaniment with my health issue that is chronic fatigue syndrome. I do speak to people and my immediate family are obviously aware but I really don’t feel like anyone is truly aware of my attitude/feelings. A big struggle is getting people to understand this.

Sorry to hear that.

It's the same with Crohns. People think of it as a bit of an upset tummy. They don't realise it's a whole body illness and sometimes my body just says nope! I've had to share material from Crohns and Colitis so when I say I'm unwell and can't go out or can't do something, people understand it's because I'm genuinely feeling unwell through fatigue, or random pain elsewhere in my body or whatever.

Is there a charity or something for chronic fatigue that spells out how you are feeling and how you struggle with things?

 

[InsomniacAttack]

Embarrassingly posted this in the wrong thread so some may have seen however please see below…

Evening, a quick one from me for this thread. Never been in this part of RTG so bear with me.

Maybe I’m out of turn mentioning depression as it’s a serious issue, however I’m unsure how else to classify my current state. Hating social interaction, always low mood, hate facing the world on a morning and generally just cynical about a lot of things (strangely, apart from SAFC!). I’m very lucky in the fact that in most of my life I’m in a good position (eg, engaged with a wedding coming up next year, good circle of friends etc) but I simply can’t get out of the habit of negative thinking, seeing the worst in everything and many other things that I simply struggle to articulate to anyone and struggle with independently. The only time I’m (genuinely and truly) happy is when I’m on the beers with friends. Hence the 3am message (feel pathetic tbh but this message is the first step of trying to move towards improving things for myself).

Struggling with the above in accompaniment with my health issue that is chronic fatigue syndrome. I do speak to people and my immediate family are obviously aware but I really don’t feel like anyone is truly aware of my attitude/feelings. A big struggle is getting people to understand this.

Appreciate the above is a lot and quite serious (to me anyway, and yes I absolutely love putting stuff in brackets) but don’t really have anywhere else to express my feelings and this forum seems appropriate with understanding members (apart from if you say Soeakman is canny and Keith Downie just does his job ).

But as per above, I completely accept I’m very fortunate and a million miles away from some of the true struggles people face. I have that perspective but still struggle. Any thoughts/advice from anyone that’s reading this would be appreciated so much.

I (do not) look forward to the fear of waking up and seeing I’ve actually put my feelings out there. Appreciate any messages I receive in advance, negative or positive.

Haway the lads.

Hope I don’t seem as if I’m feeling sorry for myself and licking any wounds

Well done for writing all that down. Takes bollocks to talk about it when you're feeling this way.

 

[Batdad]

Embarrassingly posted this in the wrong thread so some may have seen however please see below…

Evening, a quick one from me for this thread. Never been in this part of RTG so bear with me.

Maybe I’m out of turn mentioning depression as it’s a serious issue, however I’m unsure how else to classify my current state. Hating social interaction, always low mood, hate facing the world on a morning and generally just cynical about a lot of things (strangely, apart from SAFC!). I’m very lucky in the fact that in most of my life I’m in a good position (eg, engaged with a wedding coming up next year, good circle of friends etc) but I simply can’t get out of the habit of negative thinking, seeing the worst in everything and many other things that I simply struggle to articulate to anyone and struggle with independently. The only time I’m (genuinely and truly) happy is when I’m on the beers with friends. Hence the 3am message (feel pathetic tbh but this message is the first step of trying to move towards improving things for myself).

Struggling with the above in accompaniment with my health issue that is chronic fatigue syndrome. I do speak to people and my immediate family are obviously aware but I really don’t feel like anyone is truly aware of my attitude/feelings. A big struggle is getting people to understand this.

Appreciate the above is a lot and quite serious (to me anyway, and yes I absolutely love putting stuff in brackets) but don’t really have anywhere else to express my feelings and this forum seems appropriate with understanding members (apart from if you say Soeakman is canny and Keith Downie just does his job ).

But as per above, I completely accept I’m very fortunate and a million miles away from some of the true struggles people face. I have that perspective but still struggle. Any thoughts/advice from anyone that’s reading this would be appreciated so much.

I (do not) look forward to the fear of waking up and seeing I’ve actually put my feelings out there. Appreciate any messages I receive in advance, negative or positive.

Haway the lads.

Hope I don’t seem as if I’m feeling sorry for myself and licking any wounds

CBT targets stuff like this.

 

[Shambo]

Embarrassingly posted this in the wrong thread so some may have seen however please see below…

Evening, a quick one from me for this thread. Never been in this part of RTG so bear with me.

Maybe I’m out of turn mentioning depression as it’s a serious issue, however I’m unsure how else to classify my current state. Hating social interaction, always low mood, hate facing the world on a morning and generally just cynical about a lot of things (strangely, apart from SAFC!). I’m very lucky in the fact that in most of my life I’m in a good position (eg, engaged with a wedding coming up next year, good circle of friends etc) but I simply can’t get out of the habit of negative thinking, seeing the worst in everything and many other things that I simply struggle to articulate to anyone and struggle with independently. The only time I’m (genuinely and truly) happy is when I’m on the beers with friends. Hence the 3am message (feel pathetic tbh but this message is the first step of trying to move towards improving things for myself).

Struggling with the above in accompaniment with my health issue that is chronic fatigue syndrome. I do speak to people and my immediate family are obviously aware but I really don’t feel like anyone is truly aware of my attitude/feelings. A big struggle is getting people to understand this.

Appreciate the above is a lot and quite serious (to me anyway, and yes I absolutely love putting stuff in brackets) but don’t really have anywhere else to express my feelings and this forum seems appropriate with understanding members (apart from if you say Soeakman is canny and Keith Downie just does his job ).

But as per above, I completely accept I’m very fortunate and a million miles away from some of the true struggles people face. I have that perspective but still struggle. Any thoughts/advice from anyone that’s reading this would be appreciated so much.

I (do not) look forward to the fear of waking up and seeing I’ve actually put my feelings out there. Appreciate any messages I receive in advance, negative or positive.

Haway the lads.

Hope I don’t seem as if I’m feeling sorry for myself and licking any wounds

fair play for opening up and saying how you feel. Depression can be, and often is, nothing at all to do with a persons circumstances. Nothing at all wrong with looking into how to make yourself feel better, or going to talk to someone about it. It shows you want to make an effort to be happier and not wallow!

 

[InsomniacAttack]

Embarrassingly posted this in the wrong thread so some may have seen however please see below…

Evening, a quick one from me for this thread. Never been in this part of RTG so bear with me.

Maybe I’m out of turn mentioning depression as it’s a serious issue, however I’m unsure how else to classify my current state. Hating social interaction, always low mood, hate facing the world on a morning and generally just cynical about a lot of things (strangely, apart from SAFC!). I’m very lucky in the fact that in most of my life I’m in a good position (eg, engaged with a wedding coming up next year, good circle of friends etc) but I simply can’t get out of the habit of negative thinking, seeing the worst in everything and many other things that I simply struggle to articulate to anyone and struggle with independently. The only time I’m (genuinely and truly) happy is when I’m on the beers with friends. Hence the 3am message (feel pathetic tbh but this message is the first step of trying to move towards improving things for myself).

Struggling with the above in accompaniment with my health issue that is chronic fatigue syndrome. I do speak to people and my immediate family are obviously aware but I really don’t feel like anyone is truly aware of my attitude/feelings. A big struggle is getting people to understand this.

Appreciate the above is a lot and quite serious (to me anyway, and yes I absolutely love putting stuff in brackets) but don’t really have anywhere else to express my feelings and this forum seems appropriate with understanding members (apart from if you say Soeakman is canny and Keith Downie just does his job ).

But as per above, I completely accept I’m very fortunate and a million miles away from some of the true struggles people face. I have that perspective but still struggle. Any thoughts/advice from anyone that’s reading this would be appreciated so much.

I (do not) look forward to the fear of waking up and seeing I’ve actually put my feelings out there. Appreciate any messages I receive in advance, negative or positive.

Haway the lads.

Hope I don’t seem as if I’m feeling sorry for myself and licking any wounds

@FifeMackem95 been a few days how are you feeling mate? Hope all OK.

 

[scraff]

If anyone is struggling and brave enough to take a dip in the sea on Sunday mornings I will wholeheartedly recommend the iceguys. Great set of blokes looking out for each other. Not just going in the sea they have therapeutic workshops and walking football and sometimes organise other activities. You will find them on facey and insta iceguyscic

 

[Bulmers]

I’m slightly different I accepted that Christmas has nothing to do with god or religion and is the pagan festival of welcoming back the sun. Christanity simply pinched it. It was on one of those What is Christmas programs that Jesus was born in April.

Christ you mean Mithra, at least the Christians only nicked ideas not back in the day.

 

[lucky]

If anyone is struggling and brave enough to take a dip in the sea on Sunday mornings I will wholeheartedly recommend the iceguys. Great set of blokes looking out for each other. Not just going in the sea they have therapeutic workshops and walking football and sometimes organise other activities. You will find them on facey and insta iceguyscic

Jesus not for me I'm too soft but good luck mate
Hope everyone doing alright and as well as they can be and sending all my love to everyone out there .

 

[joebolton]

I just popped on to say hello and I sincerely hope everyone is managing ok.

It is a really hard part of the year , and I know I started to go downhill when I started seeing everyone’s fantastic Christmas’s on social media , and I look at mine.

I can see now why I like work so much. I get the “meaningful human contact “ every day there.
Broke up on Monday and it’s another 60 hours to survive till I get back.

My mates are either offshore , working ( NHS and police) or don’t go out anyway. I have had a good morning today , took next doors dog on a 6 mile walk with a couple of the stay at home lads. Same tomorrow , then that gap between 12 and bedtime.

Sunday I see my son for a few hours , pamper night ready for work on Monday. Full day of football Sunday as well that helps.

I’m thinking out loud here , sorry. I hope you are all ok , and something great happens for you all in the new year. X

 

[lucky]

I just popped on to say hello and I sincerely hope everyone is managing ok.

It is a really hard part of the year , and I know I started to go downhill when I started seeing everyone’s fantastic Christmas’s on social media , and I look at mine.

I can see now why I like work so much. I get the “meaningful human contact “ every day there.
Broke up on Monday and it’s another 60 hours to survive till I get back.

My mates are either offshore , working ( NHS and police) or don’t go out anyway. I have had a good morning today , took next doors dog on a 6 mile walk with a couple of the stay at home lads. Same tomorrow , then that gap between 12 and bedtime.

Sunday I see my son for a few hours , pamper night ready for work on Monday. Full day of football Sunday as well that helps.

I’m thinking out loud here , sorry. I hope you are all ok , and something great happens for you all in the new year. X

Same goes to you mate , hope you have the best year and take no notice of social media it's shite and they only put stuff on for others to see to big them up .
How you managing @joebolton

 

[joebolton]

Same goes to you mate , hope you have the best year and take no notice of social media it's shite and they only put stuff on for others to see to big them up .
How you managing @joebolton

This is the long drag now 12 till bedtime. Going to finish painting the bedroom , try and learn another chord on the guitar.
I just wish me mates were a bit more out there, but they are quite happy just vegging in front of the telly.

I like structure. Mon to Fri 8-6.30 out at work , tea , shower relax. Saturdays for action , but there just doesn’t seem to be any.

I have an option of a date on NYE , which is good , BUT I think she is picking up on my funny ways of routine etc. I know I am going to self sabotage it like the last 3 lasses.

all 3 said ( in effect ) the same thing. Why don’t you let yourself be the man you COULD be.
I don’t know how to. Not for any length of time.

What did that comedian say , I’m like the Dominican Republic , I am great for 5 days , then issues appear

But thanks for asking. 36 hours to go now.