What do you think about this?



Fred Secrets said:
One of my very good friends, for the last couple of months, at least, is ringing me constantly. Constantly. Now, pretty much everyone I'd consider myself to be good friends with, unless we've a night out or something coming up, we might only speak once every few weeks, if that. That's enough. All other contact is sending childish videos on WhatsApp etc. We don't feel the need to ring each other constantly for a chat. When we meet up for a few pints every so often, that when the catching up is done.

As it stands, he's rang me 17 times in the last 20 days. Sometimes twice a day. Is that normal in anyone's opinion? Some calls I'm not able to answer, some I chose not to & some I do. It's driving me absolutely insane. There's no possible way of me telling him to just relax with all the phone calls without him more than likely getting offended. I honestly don't know why he's ringing me so much. He doesn't ring his Mrs that much. I spoke to him on Friday, he rang twice on Saturday, once yesterday & again today. I mean, FFS, please give me a break.

Any suggestions on how to deal with this without falling out with him?
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Just tell him to fuck off and stop ringing you as much because you cannot be boshed and only fanny do this. A real mate would not take that to heart, tell you to fuck off back and you would have a good giggle over it all. ;)
 
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monkeytassle said:
Hi mate. Are you OK? Seem to be speaking more than usual. Anything up I can help with or if you need me keep calling.

Simple no?
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Say this!

My son starts conversations with me about random irrelevant things when he's struggling with his mental health. It's when he doesn't want to say he's feeling unwell but he wants some company.
 
monkeytassle said:
Hi mate. Are you OK? Seem to be speaking more than usual. Anything up I can help with or if you need me keep calling.

Simple no?
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But it won't be as simple as that. No matter what way I dress it up, I'll be basically telling him to stop ringing me.

& like I said, there's no issue in his life. He'll just say "Who the fuck does he think he is? I'm only ringing for a chat".
humbug said:
he's not wanting to be more than good friends is he?
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Not at all. Like I said, just using me half the time to keep him company on the drive home.
Derekftm said:
Cant be very close if your frightened to ask him a simple question
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I said he's a good friend, not a close one.
 
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Fred Secrets said:
But it won't be as simple as that. No matter what way I dress it up, I'll be basically telling him to stop ringing me.

& like I said, there's no issue in his life. He'll just say "Who the fuck does he think he is? I'm only ringing for a chat".


Not at all. Like I said, just using me half the time to keep him company on the drive home.


I said he's a good friend, not a close one.
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If he's a mate he'll understand
 
Just ask him, as tactfully as possible, "as a mate, do you mind if I ask, is everything ok ?
it's just that you've suddenly started to phone me a lot lately, which you never used to do, and I was wondering if everything is ok"

Hopefully, he'll appreciate your concern, and he may well explain the reason behind his frequent phone calls.

I speak to only one of my mates, once a fortnight, for a couple of minutes on the day afore a match, just to see where we're meeting for a pre match drink.
 
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monkeytassle said:
If he's a mate he'll understand
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He'll understandably think I'm telling him to stop ringing me, more like. & even then, he'll be second guessing himself then, thinking "OK, is it OK to ring him now"? Fuck that, I don't want to try to control my friends. At least this thread is confirmation that it is actually weird behaviour. My Mrs just thinks I'm being an odd twat.

I spoke to him on Friday, told him that I was going for a meal with the wife and kids on Saturday night. He rang on Saturday, I missed the call. He rang on Saturday night when I was in the restaurant & I just texted him telling him where I was. He rang yesterday, I had my hands full with the kids so couldn't answer. He then texted me last night asking what the food was like the night before. 🤷‍♂️
 

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