Old rhymes from you're chilhood

Fatty and skinny were in the bath
Fatty blew off, and made skinny laugh.

Fatty and Skinny went to the war
Fatty got shot with an apple core
Skinny went home to tell his mam
And all he got was a kick up the bum
 


Dave Herbal said:
I was amazed when I heard my kids doing eeny meeny and they’d changed it to catch a fish by his toe.

A tiger or something maybe, but a bloody fish???
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My bairn (brought up in America obvs) says “Tiger” completely unprompted by me so she must have picked that up at school.

In all honesty when we were bairns I thought we were saying “catch a nicker” i.e. a thief (someone who nicked something). I distinctly remember a teacher when we were in the first year juniors holding up a big baby doll and saying we should say “catch a baby” and being puzzled wondering what was so wrong with “nicker” 😄😄
 
I remember the 1st one as there's a few versions I foind.

Jack and Jill went up the hill
To fetch a pail of water.
Jack fell down on top of Jill,
And now they have a daughter!

Jack and Jill went up the hill
To have a little fun.
Stupid Jill forgot her pill,
And now they have a son!

Jack and Jill went up the hill.
Both were feeling wild.
Jack got laid; Jill got paid.
Now they have a child.
 
We four Beatles from Liverpool are
George on a bike, and Paul in a car
John on a scooter
Honking his hooter
Following Ringo Starr

(to the tune of We Three Kings of Orient are)
 
I think these came from a Rag Mag..... (remember them?)

Hush, hush
Whisper who dares;
Christopher Robin sits on the stairs.
Blood on the carpet
Fur on the mat;
Christopher Robin's castrated the cat.

And:

Mary had a little lamb
It's fleece was black as night;
The scruffy woolly b@stard
Had rolled in badger's sh!te.
 
OLDROKERENDER said:
We four Beatles from Liverpool are
George on a bike, and Paul in a car
John on a scooter
Honking his hooter
Following Ringo Starr

(to the tune of We Three Kings of Orient are)
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There was another one that went summit like this

We 3 Kings of Orient are
one in a tractor
one in a car
one on a scooter
bipping (or honking) his hooter

as usual, can't remember the rest 🤣
 
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If you want to buy a car buy a jag
It’s got a big back seat to have a shag
It’s got a biscuit tin to keep your condoms in
If you want to buy a car a buy a jag

—

We three kings of horsley hill square
Selling knickers £3 a pair
They’re fantastic no elastic
Why don’t you buy a pair
 

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