Hangover Cures



Usual hangovers that require me to leave the house a combination or all of the following.

Shower
Cup of coffee
Sprite
Wank
Breakfast bap of sorts
Few lagers
Scottish breakfast

For a major hangover that lasts until the evening a dirty takeaway around 6pm.
 
Lashings of self pity and a nexium control tablet to stave off the heartburn caused by the inevitable recovery drinks and takeaway.
 
I once made the mistake of having All Bran for breakfast after I'd been out the night before. I could feel the gas inside building up and working in an office at the time I just couldn't let it go. After hours of doing this I went to the toilet and could feel it was going to be a big one. I put the plastic seat down, lifted my leg up and let out the biggest loudest fart I've ever heard. It even bounced around the toilets because of the tiles as it went up in pitch like a motorbike coming towards you. Luckily I recorded it and there's a laugh from me as the reverb dies away. I hid it amongst some songs on a CD at a festival.
 

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