- Status
R
Richy Rich
Guest
Heard a lot on here about having and coping with the disease but not a lot about how it came to be, can anyone shed any light of how the problem started/built up? What started it - personal circumstances, society, people, head injury? Interested to know kind of events trigger it, is it just the ceasing of seratonin production or is it also a mental illness where the person is crucified by their own thoughts and black outlook on life?
Last edited by a moderator:
Georgey Squaat Pants
Striker
First time i went this is what i got but it was through the local pct in kent, it was a waste of time, 5 telephone appointments over 10 weeks. seriously think it made me worse, when i moved up to northumberland i went back and the gp was excellent, you need to force the issuew though pal.
S
SKP
Guest
Hopefully this thread is helping a few people out
It seems some are opening up without thinking about it, I've seen it briefly with my parents and it ain't nice
Talk to your mates, if not pm someone on this thread for a chat
It seems some are opening up without thinking about it, I've seen it briefly with my parents and it ain't nice
Talk to your mates, if not pm someone on this thread for a chat
T
The Great Perhaps
Guest
I'm keeping things at arms length because when she lashes out I bear the f***ing brunt and I'm delicate meself at the minute.
watsonuk1
Striker
i tend to just read the stuff that goes on here. i never really feel confident enough to join in. just wanted to say i know a few people on here and I'm not going to name them but reading through this thread has made me really proud to know them. hopefully i will start posting more. me personally i do find myself low and i have had times of dark moments but I've never experienced what its like to be truly suffer from depression and i hope i never do.
M
mackem_jo2
Guest
mine started after I had my first child, i spent a long time being diagnosed as 'just' post natal depression but on seeing a very good CPN who realised there was something more going on I was referred to a psych who diagnosed me as Bi-polar 2. Like schizophrenia for example, bi-polar is often triggered in late teens- early 20's with no signs beforehand, it just seems like the change in seratonin levels following my pregnancy was my trigger. With the benefit of hindsight though there's a few members of my extended family who were very likely suffering the same many many years ago so I think there's a genetic element too :-(
I'll be honest though, the provision in Sunderland is very poor, the CPN service is horrendously over stretched & in the 4-5 years i've been seeing the psychs i've seen at least that many consultants & they're always locums which means most of your appt is spent with them recapping your entire mental health history all over again.
yorkyexile
Striker
Dont honestly know and looking back from diagnosis i realise ive been suffering it for years.Ive had to go back to the doctors last week cos the 20mg`s werent working anymore.Im now on 40`s and counting the hours till the extra dosage kicks in.
I can see why my brother in law did away with himself,and others as well because once you get yourself "inside your own head" some of the thoughts are unbelievable
R
Richy Rich
Guest
mine started after I had my first child, i spent a long time being diagnosed as 'just' post natal depression but on seeing a very good CPN who realised there was something more going on I was referred to a psych who diagnosed me as Bi-polar 2. Like schizophrenia for example, bi-polar is often triggered in late teens- early 20's with no signs beforehand, it just seems like the change in seratonin levels following my pregnancy was my trigger. With the benefit of hindsight though there's a few members of my extended family who were very likely suffering the same many many years ago so I think there's a genetic element too :-(
I'll be honest though, the provision in Sunderland is very poor, the CPN service is horrendously over stretched & in the 4-5 years i've been seeing the psychs i've seen at least that many consultants & they're always locums which means most of your appt is spent with them recapping your entire mental health history all over again.
The lack of help and standard of medical professionals in Sunderland is scary, too much undiagnosed / mis-diagnosis or "this pill will fix everything - next!" going on, like we end up with the dog ends of the medical world. Mental illness can rob you of your friends, your dignity and ultimately your life so it's important that it's diagnosed quickly and dealt with properly. Good to see you got sorted out eventually and had people around you that knew what was going on.
Can only speak for myself but in my case part of it was learned behaviour, my old man was depressed for years and his reactions to people when I was a kid shaped me - constantly snapping, seeing everything in terms of perfection/total failure.
Tried to off myself at 17, shat out it and got my stomach pumped, went to see a shrink, guy looked at me like I was something under his shoe so never went back.
Spent next 10 years working like a trojan and boozing like fuck, convinced myself I was OK. Then I met the missus (no) and had our first kid.
I was in the process of quitting my job due to a serious fallout with the boss and his approach, suddenly I had a kid on the way and no income - beat myself up to fuck about it, couldn't think clearly, you convince yourself that it's all on you and no-one can help and no-one will listen. Went onto tablets, never did any counselling in a meaningful way. bumbled through and we had another 2 kids, eventually I got kicked out as my behaviour was horrible, I'd turned into my old man.
Kind of got through that, been on decent terms for the past 5 years, then in November I had a total breakdown, freaking out at the kids for making noise, staring out the window and working out how many seconds it would take to hit the ground. Go back on meds quick sharp, but it was a scary few weeks.
Been doing some self help stuff as I wait to get into a group up here, and have looked at how I got there. It wasn't an overnight thing, I had been gradually isolating myself, slowly withdrawing from everything I had enjoyed until I got to the stage i didnt want to go out.
The question of chemical imbalance v behaviours is complicated. Theres a thing called the 5 areas model, which shows how behaviours influence mood, physical symptoms etc
Logon or register to see this image
Anyway, the anti-depressents affect the physical symptoms (letting you sleep, taking the edge off your anxiety and the like) which affects the rest and allows you to do some work looking at how you got there and how you can move on and deal with life.
Soudns easy typing it, but it's f***ing murder putting it into practice
Last edited:
Kubicki85
Striker
Don't normally post anything like this but here goes:
I have suffered from depression for as long as i can remember. I also suffer my anxiety and often get panic attacks, though the latter rarely happens these days, but was a daily occurrence when i was a child.
The problem i have is that it changes on a daily basis, one day I'm perfectly fine the next the complete opposite.
I started training as a counsellor 3 year ago after going a good couple of year believing i was rid of the depression all together. Thought it would be great to be able to put my experiences to good use. Sadly it crept back into my life but the training and studying has helped me alot, but obviously it can be very difficult aswell trying to focus on difficult subject matters when your trying to figure your own mental thoughts out too.
I also suffer at night really bad, too much time to over think things. Fear of death or anything morbid. It sounds pathetic but it's a horrible feeling to come over you. The reality what is to come to us all and you can't escape it.
I have suffered from depression for as long as i can remember. I also suffer my anxiety and often get panic attacks, though the latter rarely happens these days, but was a daily occurrence when i was a child.
The problem i have is that it changes on a daily basis, one day I'm perfectly fine the next the complete opposite.
I started training as a counsellor 3 year ago after going a good couple of year believing i was rid of the depression all together. Thought it would be great to be able to put my experiences to good use. Sadly it crept back into my life but the training and studying has helped me alot, but obviously it can be very difficult aswell trying to focus on difficult subject matters when your trying to figure your own mental thoughts out too.
I also suffer at night really bad, too much time to over think things. Fear of death or anything morbid. It sounds pathetic but it's a horrible feeling to come over you. The reality what is to come to us all and you can't escape it.
Last edited:
R
Richy Rich
Guest
Stick in there mate, your subconsious can be the biggest bully. Interesting you quote "getting inside your own head" as it always seems to be the more intelligent, deep thinking individuals that it blights, the phrase "insane genius" was'nt coined for nothing - I wonder if channelling that high perception and mental power at something like a new hobby or interest would help?
Can only speak for myself but in my case part of it was learned behaviour, my old man was depressed for years and his reactions to people when I was a kid shaped me - constantly snapping, seeing everything in terms of perfection/total failure.
Tried to off myself at 17, shat out it and got my stomach pumped, went to see a shrink, guy looked at me like I was something under his shoe so never went back.
Spent next 10 years working like a trojan and boozing like fuck, convinced myself I was OK. Then I met the missus (no) and had our first kid.
I was in the process of quitting my job due to a serious fallout with the boss and his approach, suddenly I had a kid on the way and no income - beat myself up to fuck about it, couldn't think clearly, you convince yourself that it's all on you and no-one can help and no-one will listen. Went onto tablets, never did any counselling in a meaningful way. bumbled through and we had another 2 kids, eventually I got kicked out as my behaviour was horrible, I'd turned into my old man.
Kind of got through that, been on decent terms for the past 5 years, then in November I had a total breakdown, freaking out at the kids for making noise, staring out the window and working out how many seconds it would take to hit the ground. Go back on meds quick sharp, but it was a scary few weeks.
Been doing some self help stuff as I wait to get into a group up here, and have looked at how I got there. It wasn't an overnight thing, I had been gradually isolating myself, slowly withdrawing from everything I had enjoyed until I got to the stage i didnt want to go out.
The question of chemical imbalance v behaviours is complicated. Theres a thing called the 5 areas model, which shows how behaviours influence mood, physical symptoms etcLogon or register to see this image
Anyway, the anti-depressents affect the physical symptoms (letting you sleep, taking the edge off your anxiety and the like) which affects the rest and allows you to do some work looking at how you got there and how you can move on and deal with life.
Soudns easy typing it, but it's f***ing murder putting it into practice
Christ that's horrendous man, well done for getting through it. The thing about the learned behaviour with your old man sounds a lot like depression brought about by a personality disorder like aspergers or bi-polar (which would have been undiagnosed) these things can also be hereditary and might have played as big a part as the learned behaviour.
Paddy O'Dors
Striker
Just had the two worst years of my life personally, and while I never felt suicidal there's been days when I wanted to go to bed at 8pm, and when I did and woke up wanted the day to end cos I still had the same old shit to look forward too. Just over the moon that I've stopped letting the cause of my feeling down taking the piss out of my good nature, and instead of looking backward looking forward.
burchmackem
Striker
Struggled with this my whole life and even my best mate didn't know I did. It's just something I thought was normal I guess and it took nearly losing my wife before I finally hit bottom and got on meds. Thank fuck for it, too, because I'd be either not here or divorced.
It's a tough one to talk about and even tougher to spot in other people, honestly, because sufferers don't want to seem mopey or a drain on other people. Also, there's a lot of self-medicating, so when you see your mates, if it's over a pint, then everything's good. Drink makes it go away for awhile.
Don't know what else to say, sorry.
It's a tough one to talk about and even tougher to spot in other people, honestly, because sufferers don't want to seem mopey or a drain on other people. Also, there's a lot of self-medicating, so when you see your mates, if it's over a pint, then everything's good. Drink makes it go away for awhile.
Don't know what else to say, sorry.
naughtynose said:
And you shouldn't be ashamed of it, ever.
JimmyQuinn said:
You need to think about whether chemical imbalances in your body are part of it though. Hope you find the answers mate.
BucketBiff
Striker
I ve been suffering from it now for about a year, I can have good days but it's always in the back of my mind when am I going to dip,then the inevitable happens and lasts anything up to 2 weeks sometimes longer. Then the good days come, it's like a big round about where am stuck in the inside lane and need to turn left, move across the lanes and just when I think I can see a gap in the traffic and see my turn off, I get cut up and end up back where I started..it's driving round the f***ing bend if I m honest.
Kubicki85 said:Don't normally post anything like this but here goes:
I have suffered from depression for as long as i can remember. I also suffer my anxiety and often get panic attacks, though the latter rarely happens these days, but was a daily occurrence when i was a child.
The problem i have is that it changes on a daily basis, one day I'm perfectly fine the next the complete opposite.
I started training as a counsellor 3 year ago after going a good couple of year believing i was rid of the depression all together. Thought it would be great to be able to put my experiences to good use. Sadly it crept back into my life but the training and studying has helped me alot, but obviously it can be very difficult aswell trying to focus on difficult subject matters when your trying to figure your own mental thoughts out too.
I also suffer at night really bad, too much time to over think things. Fear of death or anything morbid. It sounds pathetic but it's a horrible feeling to come over you. The reality what is to come to us all and you can't escape it.
I think a lot of people will really appreciate you contributing that. I know it's only a silly website but even if all your friends and loved ones are busy or you don't feel you can burden them, you're never alone.
This- like many others on here I've suffered occasional bouts of depression and still get them from time to time so if anyone ever feels the need to write their thoughts down then you can always send me a PM- the best thing to do is speak to a doctor or a friend or loved one but sometimes people arent ready for that and just want to talk to a relative stranger but might not feel comfortable phoning the samaritan type phone lines, if anyone is ever in that situation I, along with many others on here, am always happy to listen. The worst thing anyone can do is try and battle it on their own.
JimmyQuinn
Winger
Yeah, I know.
In fairness to the doctor, he was reluctant to go straight down that route. He said try some lifestyle changes and that (which I really need to motivate myself to do ASAP) and maybe see a counsellor (which I've booked myself in for, hopefully hearing about an appointment date soon), and then if that doesn't work, we'll reassess the situation.
Got a big six months or so coming up, so just trying to motivate myself through that. Didn't really wanna mix medication into it in case it messes things up completely.
- Status
