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Depression thread continued...

Ciro_DiMarzio said:
Got pre going out anxiety today. Don't know why this happens. Just going out with two mates I've known since I was 4 year old but feel really anxious until I've got a couple of pints down. f***ing weird.

I know they will ask how things are with me and our lass and they're asking with good intentions but I don't want to talk about it with them.
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Strangely I had opposite this weekend. Knew I was going out Saturday night so Friday and Saturday just flew. Great night out loved it. Then from Sunday onwards just silence , monotony. I am just getting it in waves. Hate bank holidays. Already stressing how shit Xmas will be.
Looking forward to work now , some human contact.

I thought about a relationship again , but I wouldn’t wish myself on anyone. I have 3 good mates , but they only go out for a drink now and then.
I will be ok tomorrow. Just need to ride this wave out.
 

joebolton said:
Strangely I had opposite this weekend. Knew I was going out Saturday night so Friday and Saturday just flew. Great night out loved it. Then from Sunday onwards just silence , monotony. I am just getting it in waves. Hate bank holidays. Already stressing how shit Xmas will be.
Looking forward to work now , some human contact.

I thought about a relationship again , but I wouldn’t wish myself on anyone. I have 3 good mates , but they only go out for a drink now and then.
I will be ok tomorrow. Just need to ride this wave out.
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I always seem to go on a downer in the days following a good night out or something I have been looking forward too.
 
Ciro_DiMarzio said:
I always seem to go on a downer in the days following a good night out or something I have been looking forward too.
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Yes like an anti climax thing. Someone I trust said always have something to look forward to.
The problem with my ex ( my problem) was I didn’t look forward to the things she liked to do.
We went to see that Queen tribute act at Durham Cathedral , I thought it was shit. She asked me so I told her , and that was the end of that.
I either need to change myself , start enjoying things other people do, or just accept I am stuck in my ways.
Definitely need to keep off social media , all the happy bastards on there enjoying sitting in outside baths in cottages on the moors 😀
 
Ciro_DiMarzio said:
No.
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If you're feeling depressed and anxious most of the week, maybe it would help. Helped me a lot. Honestly, getting on an SSRI changed my life. I'm still the same person and I still get down and anxious sometimes, but it's not nearly like it was. Can you go see a psychiatrist?
 
burchmackem said:
If you're feeling depressed and anxious most of the week, maybe it would help. Helped me a lot. Honestly, getting on an SSRI changed my life. I'm still the same person and I still get down and anxious sometimes, but it's not nearly like it was. Can you go see a psychiatrist?
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I can't afford counselling but I know I should see a doctor. Been putting it off for years and years.
 
Ciro_DiMarzio said:
I can't afford counselling but I know I should see a doctor. Been putting it off for years and years.
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Is there a clinic or something you could dip into? I mean, counseling helps for sure, but I get the cost. Some places do accept sliding scale, pay-what-you-can rates.
 
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I think that's probably somewhat normal to an extent even if your not suffering depression tbh.

You basically going to something that your looking forward to then either going to get a high off attending, which then then have to come down from or you do t enjoy it and feel down for it being a let down.

Add alcohol into the mix and and it's exemplified due to it being a depressant itself.

Always good to remind yourself that it will pass in these situations as you'll start forgetting about it or find something new to look forward to after.
 
Ciro_DiMarzio said:
I can't afford counselling but I know I should see a doctor. Been putting it off for years and years.
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There's alternatives you could try. Some groups like Andy's Man Club run for free, I've not been but I know people who have and said it's welcoming and they don't ask you to speak etc if you don't want to and wait a bit to get comfortable.obvioualy can be hard to rock up to these group type sessions but worth a though.

You can do online therapy or even counsel yourself if you look online, though obviously these won't work for all and it's finding something that works for you.
 
CPLforever said:
But worse I think if you have one over the limit. I can be OK next day if I have had 2 or 3 but anymore than that and you can't stop me and the next few days are full of what have I done/what have I said.
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Aye, I've definitely fucked up some how on Saturday night after too many but I don't know what I've done. Just going to ignore it and hope it isn't as bad as I'm imagining it is.
Chatty83 said:
I think that's probably somewhat normal to an extent even if your not suffering depression tbh.

You basically going to something that your looking forward to then either going to get a high off attending, which then then have to come down from or you do t enjoy it and feel down for it being a let down.

Add alcohol into the mix and and it's exemplified due to it being a depressant itself.

Always good to remind yourself that it will pass in these situations as you'll start forgetting about it or find something new to look forward to after.
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Aye. I usually have something else lined up to look forward to even if it's months away but I've got absolutely nowt planned at the minute which doesn't help. Need to be really careful with money so can't plan anything expensive.
 
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Ciro_DiMarzio said:
Aye, I've definitely fucked up some how on Saturday night after too many but I don't know what I've done. Just going to ignore it and hope it isn't as bad as I'm imagining it is.
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Honestly, it's never as bad as we think it is. It is our very own internalised reaction to it that a lot of the time makes it feel worse than it is.

That doesn't mean we are worrying or being anxious over nothing.

Something has happened to make us anxious, scared, angry, frustrated unhappy (all those things at once in some cases). All these feelings are legitimate. It is our own ability to manage them that make us spiral.
 
Ciro_DiMarzio said:
Aye, I've definitely fucked up some how on Saturday night after too many but I don't know what I've done. Just going to ignore it and hope it isn't as bad as I'm imagining it is.

Aye. I usually have something else lined up to look forward to even if it's months away but I've got absolutely nowt planned at the minute which doesn't help. Need to be really careful with money so can't plan anything expensive.
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Yeah money can always be an issue but can still find plenty to look forward to - sports events, Euros coming up, new season (prob doesn't help being Sunderland fans lol), new music, video games, movies, TV shows depending what your into.

Again, everyone is different so it's finding things that work. I've recently started learning Japanese on Duolingo, free app, only do about 15 mins a day but you improve slightly, gives you a sense of achievement and worth and because it's free and not time consuming it's something you can just pick up anytime. My plan is to travel to Japan at somepoint when I can afford it but for now this is a good starting point for that eventually trip.

It's also gave me the incentive to do a few other things, just gonna continue with he 15 minute approach for now so if I can find 15 minutes gonna do 15 learning the guitar next. Even if just a few times a week, eventually should be able to improve and I think making little achievements can be a massive boost to anyone with issues with depression etc.
CPLforever said:
Honestly, it's never as bad as we think it is. It is our very own internalised reaction to it that a lot of the time makes it feel worse than it is.

That doesn't mean we are worrying or being anxious over nothing.

Something has happened to make us anxious, scared, angry, frustrated unhappy (all those things at once in some cases). All these feelings are legitimate. It is our own ability to manage them that make us spiral.
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Can do but amount of times I've fabricated something bad in my head and nothing has happened is quite unreal. That little memory block makes you think you've done something bad but half the time or more I reckon your just a drunken mess, dancing singing, maybes talking some shite.

Plenty times you bump into people and they just say you were drunk but harmless. Again, think it's fairly natural though to build that up into something worse than it is and let the imagination run wild. Lots of people do this, prob every day lol
 
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Chatty83 said:
Yeah money can always be an issue but can still find plenty to look forward to - sports events, Euros coming up, new season (prob doesn't help being Sunderland fans lol), new music, video games, movies, TV shows depending what your into.

Again, everyone is different so it's finding things that work. I've recently started learning Japanese on Duolingo, free app, only do about 15 mins a day but you improve slightly, gives you a sense of achievement and worth and because it's free and not time consuming it's something you can just pick up anytime. My plan is to travel to Japan at somepoint when I can afford it but for now this is a good starting point for that eventually trip.

It's also gave me the incentive to do a few other things, just gonna continue with he 15 minute approach for now so if I can find 15 minutes gonna do 15 learning the guitar next. Even if just a few times a week, eventually should be able to improve and I think making little achievements can be a massive boost to anyone with issues with depression etc.

Can do but amount of times I've fabricated something bad in my head and nothing has happened is quite unreal. That little memory block makes you think you've done something bad but half the time or more I reckon your just a drunken mess, dancing singing, maybes talking some shite.

Plenty times you bump into people and they just say you were drunk but harmless. Again, think it's fairly natural though to build that up into something worse than it is and let the imagination run wild. Lots of people do this, prob every day lol
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I am playing alot of games at the minute as it is pretty much the only thing that keeps me calm. I think it annoys out lass though so I can't win.
 
Ciro_DiMarzio said:
I am playing alot of games at the minute as it is pretty much the only thing that keeps me calm. I think it annoys out lass though so I can't win.
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Not any games she's likes to play, maybe try and get her involved. Even if it's just a bit in Mario Kart/Party or something, she might understand more if she can get involved. Or might not like but worth a blast.
 
joebolton said:
Definitely need to keep off social media , all the happy bastards on there enjoying sitting in outside baths in cottages on the moors 😀
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Just take it with a pinch of salt and remember that people only put the best things on social media. Even my own only shows the fun things I've done. Flicking back through May and I've posted about family day outs, went to a gig, last match of the season, daughters birthday and the Northern Lights. All looks positive and none of the negative stuff I've posted on this thread is on there.
Ciro_DiMarzio said:
I can't afford counselling but I know I should see a doctor. Been putting it off for years and years.
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I don't want to nag you again, but you need nagging 😊

Honestly mate you need to find the courage to make that step and contact the GP and free support to see if that helps. Take care pet xx
 
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