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Depression

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lucky said:
I am so sorry I have not replied to any posts for some reason when people have messaged on here I haven't been notified. I hope that everyone of you are safe and well this morning ❤️.
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don’t put too much pressure on yourself to respond to everything mate, you need to look after yourself too.
 
Hope everyone is okay. The feeling of hopelessness is dragging me down massively today like. Struggled to sleep for days and just seem to be getting absolutely nowhere with getting a job. Trying hard to find a reason to get out of bed every day. Try to put a brave face on for the sake of the kids on a weekend but the only thing that gets me out the house is going to the gym.
 
rey mysterio said:
Hope everyone is okay. The feeling of hopelessness is dragging me down massively today like. Struggled to sleep for days and just seem to be getting absolutely nowhere with getting a job. Trying hard to find a reason to get out of bed every day. Try to put a brave face on for the sake of the kids on a weekend but the only thing that gets me out the house is going to the gym.
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Ahhh mate it's an awful awful place but don't let that gym slip. That's amazing you still dragging yourself to the gym 👏.
 
lucky said:
Ahhh mate it's an awful awful place but don't let that gym slip. That's amazing you still dragging yourself to the gym 👏.
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Thanks mate. It’s the only thing that’s keeping me going to be honest.

The other day the bairn came in my room and must have picked up something because he gave me a hug and said everything would be alright. Absolutely killed me that did. The one thing that scares me in life is failing as a parent and I keep trying to tell myself that ultimately as long as I can be there for them nothing else really matters. But being unable to provide for them at the moment feels absolutely horrific.
 
rey mysterio said:
Thanks mate. It’s the only thing that’s keeping me going to be honest.

The other day the bairn came in my room and must have picked up something because he gave me a hug and said everything would be alright. Absolutely killed me that did. The one thing that scares me in life is failing as a parent and I keep trying to tell myself that ultimately as long as I can be there for them nothing else really matters. But being unable to provide for them at the moment feels absolutely horrific.
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Ahhh that would get to me big time as well but just imagine not being there at all for them that would be a million times worse 💔 .
 
rey mysterio said:
Thanks mate. It’s the only thing that’s keeping me going to be honest.

The other day the bairn came in my room and must have picked up something because he gave me a hug and said everything would be alright. Absolutely killed me that did. The one thing that scares me in life is failing as a parent and I keep trying to tell myself that ultimately as long as I can be there for them nothing else really matters. But being unable to provide for them at the moment feels absolutely horrific.
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You are providing for them at the moment mate. Being a parent is far more than financial. Keep your head up
 
Hendon Mad Frog said:
I've just been having a discussion with someone who works in the NHS and has worked in mental health roles previously. It got onto the topic of SSRI prescription and they said a GP prescribing medication within minutes on your first appointment goes against NICE guidelines and that a complaint should be made.

I and everyone else I know who've been prescribed SSRIs was done so within a 5-10 minute appointment with no real holistical assessment or consultation. In my case, I was told to fill in a questionaire that took a minute and then offered Sertraline straigtht away.

He's claiming he doesn't know of any GP who does this and I'm just wondering how common it actually is to be prescribed SSRIs that quickly?
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Disagree with your friend, unless they know the exact details conversation that’s been had. There’s absolutely nothing in NICE
bagpiperay said:
To answer your specific question, you need to be aware there are two diagnostic categories that that mental health professionals work with and use for diagnosing. One is the DSM 5(Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) and the other is NICE 11 (National Institute For Health and Care and Excellence). They are similar but still different in some ways. Psychiatrists generally use the NICE guidance in the UK and American Psychiatrists the DSM categories. As far as comorbidity (occurring together) is concerned, it means the following in the USA:

'In mental health, one of the more common comorbidities is that of
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. Some estimates show that
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of those with anxiety will also have symptoms of depression, and the numbers are similar for those with depression also experiencing anxiety.'

In the UK we refer often refer to NICE for facts and figures as well as treatment guidelines. It says the following 'More than half of people aged 16 to 64 years who meet the diagnostic criteria for at least 1 common mental health disorder experience comorbid anxiety and depressive disorders.

Specific criteria are used for diagnostic purposes of all mental health disorders. In NICE there is indeed a category for diagnosing anxiety and depression (6A73) which is as follows:

Description
Mixed depressive and anxiety disorder is characterised by symptoms of both anxiety and depression more days than not for a period of two weeks or more. Depressive symptoms include depressed mood or markedly diminished interest or pleasure in activities. There are multiple anxiety symptoms, which may include feeling nervous, anxious, or on edge, not being able to control worrying thoughts, fear that something awful will happen, having trouble relaxing, muscle tension, or sympathetic autonomic symptoms. Neither set of symptoms, considered separately, is sufficiently severe, numerous, or persistent to justify a diagnosis of another depressive disorder or an anxiety or fear-related disorder. The symptoms result in significant distress or significant impairment in personal, family, social, educational, occupational or other important areas of functioning. There is no history of manic or mixed episodes, which would indicate the presence of a bipolar disorder.
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We use WHO’s diagnostic criteria from the ICD11.
 
rey mysterio said:
Thanks mate. It’s the only thing that’s keeping me going to be honest.

The other day the bairn came in my room and must have picked up something because he gave me a hug and said everything would be alright. Absolutely killed me that did. The one thing that scares me in life is failing as a parent and I keep trying to tell myself that ultimately as long as I can be there for them nothing else really matters. But being unable to provide for them at the moment feels absolutely horrific.
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The best thing you can do for your kids is to look after yourself. Worrying yourself literally into sickness will hurt them more in the long run than some temporary situation.
 
rey mysterio said:
Hope everyone is okay. The feeling of hopelessness is dragging me down massively today like. Struggled to sleep for days and just seem to be getting absolutely nowhere with getting a job. Trying hard to find a reason to get out of bed every day. Try to put a brave face on for the sake of the kids on a weekend but the only thing that gets me out the house is going to the gym.
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You've made it pretty clear you don't like me for whatever reason, but I don't do grudges or childish crap, so here's some advice from one human being to another. Try not to put a brave face on, especially in front of your kids...they are developing, and that means they have an acceptance of you in whatever form, no matter your physical or mental health. Ask yourself why I should irk you in any way...when you find an answer. many other things will become clear.

I'm weird, if I pretended I wasn't my life would have been one long miserable lie.

I wish you well.
 
rey mysterio said:
Hope everyone is okay. The feeling of hopelessness is dragging me down massively today like. Struggled to sleep for days and just seem to be getting absolutely nowhere with getting a job. Trying hard to find a reason to get out of bed every day. Try to put a brave face on for the sake of the kids on a weekend but the only thing that gets me out the house is going to the gym.
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Best wishes to you.

I agree with Gelan from my personal experience at least. I think hiding how you feel just makes it harder. I was struggling a couple of weeks ago and I spent several days with my parents in law hiding it and pretending everything was ok. It was draining and was just making it worse. It wasnt until I was back home and opened up to everyone about how I was struggling that I felt better. People cant help you if they dont know you need help.

My dad has always hidden his feelings or if he was feeling unwell. I have always wished he would just be honest. What he thinks is being brave tbh I see as weakness.
 
@rey mysterio how you doing mate ?
Turner the Cat said:
Best wishes to you.

I agree with Gelan from my personal experience at least. I think hiding how you feel just makes it harder. I was struggling a couple of weeks ago and I spent several days with my parents in law hiding it and pretending everything was ok. It was draining and was just making it worse. It wasnt until I was back home and opened up to everyone about how I was struggling that I felt better. People cant help you if they dont know you need help.

My dad has always hidden his feelings or if he was feeling unwell. I have always wished he would just be honest. What he thinks is being brave tbh I see as weakness.
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Well done mate for opening up that really is so brave and the more people like yourself can help others so much just by telling your experience 👏.
 
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Gelan said:
You've made it pretty clear you don't like me for whatever reason, but I don't do grudges or childish crap, so here's some advice from one human being to another. Try not to put a brave face on, especially in front of your kids...they are developing, and that means they have an acceptance of you in whatever form, no matter your physical or mental health. Ask yourself why I should irk you in any way...when you find an answer. many other things will become clear.

I'm weird, if I pretended I wasn't my life would have been one long miserable lie.

I wish you well.
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Yeah I get what you mean like. I get that a lot about not looking down in front of the kids from my parents but I don’t think they have any real idea what they are on about, especially as their answer to resolve problems is whoever shouts loudest in the argument wins.

Not sure where you think I don’t like you from though I think you’re canny ;)
lucky said:
@rey mysterio how you doing mate ?

Well done mate for opening up that really is so brave and the more people like yourself can help others so much just by telling your experience 👏.
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I’m plodding along thanks, hope you’re okay and the others on here, still no update about a job although I have an interview with a different place on Monday and it’s in my line of work so hopefully that comes off.

The weather is making me feel a lot better too. Any reason to get outside I suppose
 
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rey mysterio said:
Yeah I get what you mean like. I get that a lot about not looking down in front of the kids from my parents but I don’t think they have any real idea what they are on about, especially as their answer to resolve problems is whoever shouts loudest in the argument wins.

Not sure where you think I don’t like you from though I think you’re canny ;)


I’m plodding along thanks, hope you’re okay and the others on here, still no update about a job although I have an interview with a different place on Monday and it’s in my line of work so hopefully that comes off.

The weather is making me feel a lot better too. Any reason to get outside I suppose
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Good luck for Monday mate and enjoy the sun and yeah I'm good thankyou.
 
Hi chaps seems like you are all motoring on 🙏

Was in the town last night and it was about 2am saw a lass with loads of cuts on her arms :( spoke to her for a bit and she came back apologising about how she was speaking to me... Had a low feeling for about 30 mins with my head down and a couple of canny people checked on me 👍 .She mentioned about me having a wife and told her I wasn't. My insecurities came flooding back and felt like I fucked it up... but I did have a good night though :lol:

take care everyone you are all class!
 
So down tonight, a week long visit from a friend and his wife who I've known for 55 years. A gentle laughter filled soul and his mind is going, and it's quite noticeable, and at one point he reared up at his wife and this was so out of character to the person he once was.
It feels like a bereavement.
He and I used to hang out with another guy in the 60's and 70's who has been in a slough of anxiety and depression ever since his first daughter died some years ago.
Ma in law is ageing badly, withdrawn, again incredibly anxious and depressed and my other half has had to go back to England for a while to try and sort her.
So I'm sitting here alone, I'm looking back over premature bereavements, lovers and friends gone before, and life just really seems to be a series of continual losses-
I've had reactive depression before but have just always had sufficient resouces not to spiral down.
And tonight... feels very painful. A f***ing great wall of grief-
Is serial loss somehow accumulative because I thought I'd dealt with most of this years ago?
Or is it seeing my dear friend so reduced and realising I'm not immortal.

Thanks for the space to express all this.
 
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