dangermows
Striker
You'll be rewarded in Heaven (on the off chance there is one of course).
|Domestic violence stats.
- Thread starter Gelan
- Start date
Boz33
Striker
Tip top attitude fella, much respect
Gelan
Winger
I forgot to mention that the song "Delila" is responsible for most DV in Wales.
Around 70% of domestic assaults are alcohol fuelled...but everyone likes a drink, sadly.
The stealth ones hit you in a way so the injuries are hidden and it's harder to get help without visible signs. For example, holding you down by the throat and punching you in the torso. You can be walking round with bruises but nobody can see because they're under your clothes.
It's not always injuries to yourself. Sometimes they deliberately break things in the house, like smashing your glasses on the floor or punching a hole in the wall.
Then there's the mind games. They start arguments with your friends and family and make them feel uncomfortable, so they drift away from you.
They monitor who you speak to online and moderate your messages so things are deleted before you get to read them which damages friendships.
They control how much you can eat by doing things like secretly counting the biscuits in the biscuit tin and then getting angry because you've eaten some of them.
They put you down all the time and damage your self worth and self confidence by calling you names and telling you that nobody else likes you, you're a waste of space etc.
They gaslight. You might say you'll be back by 4pm, but then when you arrive home they go ballistic and demand to know where you've been and tell you that you said you'd be back at 2pm. Repeat often enough and you end up confused and doubt your own state of mind. Then they claim you're mentally ill and will have the children taken off you if you try and get help.
You just end up living in a permanent state of fear and confusion.
It's not always injuries to yourself. Sometimes they deliberately break things in the house, like smashing your glasses on the floor or punching a hole in the wall.
Then there's the mind games. They start arguments with your friends and family and make them feel uncomfortable, so they drift away from you.
They monitor who you speak to online and moderate your messages so things are deleted before you get to read them which damages friendships.
They control how much you can eat by doing things like secretly counting the biscuits in the biscuit tin and then getting angry because you've eaten some of them.
They put you down all the time and damage your self worth and self confidence by calling you names and telling you that nobody else likes you, you're a waste of space etc.
They gaslight. You might say you'll be back by 4pm, but then when you arrive home they go ballistic and demand to know where you've been and tell you that you said you'd be back at 2pm. Repeat often enough and you end up confused and doubt your own state of mind. Then they claim you're mentally ill and will have the children taken off you if you try and get help.
You just end up living in a permanent state of fear and confusion.
Billy2Sheds
Winger
It is estimated that 23% of women and 18% of men in the UK have hit their partner at least once in their relationships. The last census shows that there are around 19 million adults in relationships...not good at maths but that equates to millions of assaults. I cannot find out how these estimates were arrived at, so I asked everyone I knew if they'd ever hit their partner. From 15 couples only two haven't come to blows, these being the newest relationships. I could and should add two more that were "no comment" Is this a modern phenomena? I grew up in the 50's and knew about every volatile relationship in our street...how that was thought of as a part of everyday life is beyond me. Basically, we are still savages in this way, and I believe the level of domestic violence hasn't changed much since I was a kid, it's just more advertised. My father never raised his voice to my mother let alone a hand, so I carried on the family tradition, but no way does that set me on a pedestal because luckily I was given the correct life instructions.
Absent fathers? Bad father's? Bad siblings? Nut job partners? I have no idea, but it's across all social classes and nowt to do with wealth.
Your input would be useful for my research...cheers
Are you not a victim yourself? Sure you’ve posted previously that you’ve been set about / assaulted by your partner
BarrySheensAutograph
Central Defender
I'm pretty sure I read somewhere that Lesbians have the highest percentage of Domestic Abuse than any other group.
Gelan
Winger
Yes I am, hence the research...can't say the past bothers me much, but I understand some events stop us living for the day. My work isn't going to remedy the effect of relationship trauma, but it may bring an understanding and a modicom of comfort.
