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Depression thread continued...


Horatio Pugwash said:
I haven't read the thread (94 pages!).
But what have people tried in the way of therapy?)
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Been through a few different ones now.

CBT - didnt work for me
EMDR - mixed results, it was with breathing techniques which worked really well, unsure how much the EMDR worked.
Normal one to one therapy, really depends on person who you are talking with, but mine didnt feel she was qualified so was moved to a trauma therapist and then a complex PTSD trained one, lad called David from talking therapies who was fantastic. My second PTSD therapist didnt work out as well but at the same time the mental health team thought the failure for so much therapy to "stick" might be because I could have ADHD, said its difficult to know as many symptoms are the same as childhood trauma, so on the waiting list to speak to some one from psychiatry UK, I did score really high on the tests, its just working out if its a factor or if its a symptom of the trauma.

If you or a loved one is in need of help, get in touch with talking therapies, can self refer dont need your doctor to do it.
 
Parkmaverick said:
Well the pre - Christmas downer has kicked in need to remove myself from Facebook and telly with adverts. Always look forward to Boxing Day and the football but that’s not until the 28th this year. No gigs in December this year so may well be a long month.
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I hear you brother.

No worse time of year to be feeling low. If I could fast forward to Jan 1st I'd do it now!
 
Parkmaverick said:
Well the pre - Christmas downer has kicked in need to remove myself from Facebook and telly with adverts. Always look forward to Boxing Day and the football but that’s not until the 28th this year. No gigs in December this year so may well be a long month.
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Aye I'm dreading Christmas this year. It will be my first one when I won't wake up in the same house as the kids. I can't wait for it to be over.
 
Gennaro Savastano said:
Aye I'm dreading Christmas this year. It will be my first one when I won't wake up in the same house as the kids. I can't wait for it to be over.
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Its 5 years for me my two are both in their 20's one doesn't speak to me at all and one hardly speaks. Sad thing is that I don't know what im supposed to have done/not done so no way to put it right.
 
Parkmaverick said:
Well the pre - Christmas downer has kicked in need to remove myself from Facebook and telly with adverts. Always look forward to Boxing Day and the football but that’s not until the 28th this year. No gigs in December this year so may well be a long month.
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Might have a spare futureheads ticket...
 
Parkmaverick said:
Its 5 years for me my two are both in their 20's one doesn't speak to me at all and one hardly speaks. Sad thing is that I don't know what im supposed to have done/not done so no way to put it right.
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My eldest kid is in his 20s. I parted from his mother when he was 2 or 3 and she moved 100 miles away. I went through the court for a contact order, would drive to collect him for weekends, paid maintenance etc.

I haven’t seen the ungrateful sod for about 2 years! To be honest if he’s now an independent adult then his parents did what was expected. But it would be nice for some contact. He tends to fall out with his relatives which is in his DNA from both parents.
Gennaro Savastano said:
Mine are still kids. Still close at the moment but I'll never get used to not seeing them everyday.
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I went through it and I had some lonely Christmases and new years even though my family lived locally, it just wasn’t the same without seeing my son when he was young.

All you can do is sort out a contact order and spend as much time as you can with them.

Eventually you do find other things to do in your spare time - use this opportunity if you can. I tended to visit pubs and arrange internet dates …. but in hindsight I should have joined a gym, learned a language, done something useful. At least I met some ‘interesting’ women.
 
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Ned Land said:
My eldest kid is in his 20s. I parted from his mother when he was 2 or 3 and she moved 100 miles away. I went through the court for a contact order, would drive to collect him for weekends, paid maintenance etc.

I haven’t seen the ungrateful sod for about 2 years! To be honest if he’s now an independent adult then his parents did what was expected. But it would be nice for some contact. He tends to fall out with his relatives which is in his DNA from both parents.

I went through it and I had some lonely Christmases and new years even though my family lived locally, it just wasn’t the same without seeing my son when he was young.

All you can do is sort out a contact order and spend as much time as you can with them.

Eventually you do find other things to do in your spare time - use this opportunity if you can. I tended to visit pubs and arrange internet dates …. but in hindsight I should have joined a gym, learned a language, done something useful. At least I met some ‘interesting’ women.
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I've joined the gym. I might even start going at some point. I have plans for New Year's but Christmas will be rough lol.
 
Gennaro Savastano said:
Over Christmas I am having them sleepover on the 23rd until early evening on Christmas eve then I am getting them on Boxing day afternoon for a couple of nights.
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👍

Next year you should be having them on Christmas Day. Stick in there, behave impeccably, get everything in writing, don’t get wound up, your day will come. You have a right to alternate Christmas days.

This year can you arrange to be with friends, family, positive people?
 
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Ned Land said:
👍

Next year you should be having them on Christmas Day. Stick in there, behave impeccably, get everything in writing, don’t get wound up, your day will come. You have a right to alternate Christmas days.

This year can you arrange to be with friends, family, positive people?
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Will be having Christmas dinner at my sister's and staying off the drink.
 
Really struggling at the moment. Have a 12 week old and 2 toddlers with minimal family support. Work not letting up and they want me to visit numerous sites home and abroad in December when I barely get any sleep and the wife is struggling to cope without me. I have pushed back and had no sympathy at all. Been really hurt by the lack of family support and network around me. Feel like I'm overly sensitive to every little knock at the moment which is a sign of depression in itself probably, but I am drifting away from people where I am annoyed at the lack of support. Can't work out if I am justified in pulling away or being overly sensitive as it's happening with a few different people. Financial stress on top is hitting us hard at the moment. Luckily haven't turned to gambling as a solution to that which I have done in the past. All feels a bit much atm and I'm sinking.

Sorry I don't post much but always reading and just want to vent somewhere. Hope everyone else is ok.
 
EiffelTower said:
Really struggling at the moment. Have a 12 week old and 2 toddlers with minimal family support. Work not letting up and they want me to visit numerous sites home and abroad in December when I barely get any sleep and the wife is struggling to cope without me. I have pushed back and had no sympathy at all. Been really hurt by the lack of family support and network around me. Feel like I'm overly sensitive to every little knock at the moment which is a sign of depression in itself probably, but I am drifting away from people where I am annoyed at the lack of support. Can't work out if I am justified in pulling away or being overly sensitive as it's happening with a few different people. Financial stress on top is hitting us hard at the moment. Luckily haven't turned to gambling as a solution to that which I have done in the past. All feels a bit much atm and I'm sinking.

Sorry I don't post much but always reading and just want to vent somewhere. Hope everyone else is ok.
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I feel for you mate. Particularly in regards to the lack of support. This place is the only place I can vent, because nobody else in my life gives a toss.
 
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