Is the match day stand something mental health related?
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Depression
- Thread starter Maravilla
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Thanks mate. I appreciate that. Hope all is well with you and your family xx
Yes it's part of the Foundation's Game of II Halves programme to prevent suicide and provide support for mental health issues.
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Where is this? Sounds a great initiative.
Thinking of you @FlashGordon. I assume you've been to your gp but Becs suggestion of the local men's groups might be somewhere you could gain support.
chopsfc007
Striker
We are here for you mate
Five-Quarter
Midfield
Don't necessarily need to comment much more except to say that's a really "good" post. I don't mean good as such, more insightful
This last fortnight have been struggling again. Am utterly sick. Every day at the moment am going tits up and having to deal with it
A CPN appointment and I might as well have just answered the phone and said I'll save you the bother because I know what you're going to say
The best you can offer when I've poured
out all that, some of which is very hard to describe and talk about/accept, some of which I don't acknowledge is to just put me into an 'anxiety/depression' box - is f***ing talking changes again
Because it's the cheapest quickest option
Am done with services. Years of this now and I get absolutely nowhere every single time
Turner the Cat
Midfield
I was going to ask the other day of peoples experiences dealing with the NHS with mental health issues. My experience is pretty poor both NHS and private. I get the impression thats pretry similar for most.
I asked for CBT once from the NHS and never heard from them again so went private. I had one amazing therapist but three average to poor. I paid £120 an hour for a bloke who was awful.
Five-Quarter
Midfield
Was with the "GP-aligned team" and have had stints a few years ago bouncing into crisis team and then community MH
So I'd hoped I could move forward a bit with some specifics that cause me the biggest problems and look at meds etc
Seemed to talk over the top of me constantly to get the conversation back to a rushed pre-prepared direction
Came off the phone and just sobbed. Felt like being shoved back into the square one queue for something that's pretty generic /a gateway service
It seems it's a game that am not very good at playing
Am going to pursue some sessions of CBT and TBT elsewhere but I can't see me trying the NHS again now
Thanks mate. Probably closing it off a little bit by typing that
Last time I was referred to Talking Changes for help dealing with trauma from past abuse, the counsellor decided to look for other stuff to deal with. We spent three sessions discussing my childhood with a fine tooth comb as he was desperate to find some childhood trauma. There wasn't any.
He then moved onto day to day life and how I manage juggling work, physical health issues, parenting etc. He was probing about my housework and I told him I always do the essentials, like cleaning the kitchen and bathroom as that's a health hazard if you let jobs build up there. If I'm unwell, I'll put off jobs like hoovering for a few days until I get irritated by the dog hair and less essential jobs like cleaning the windows or washing down doorframes and skirting boards just get put off altogether. For some reason he fixated on the windows. He wanted me to draw up a plan where I allocate half an hour a day to cleaning one or two windows, and then by the next session I'd have cleaned all my windows and my life would be much better.
Had several sessions overall with the aim of tackling the scars of abuse, but every time I mentioned my ex, he changed the subject and wanted to talk about something else in my life. Never actually did any work dealing with the issues I referred myself for. Then he suddenly proclaimed I was better and discharged me against my wishes.
Turner the Cat
Midfield
Thanks @Becs and @Five-Quarter I'm sorry for those experiences which sound awful but familiar.
At its core it feels like we all wanted to be listened to and heard but ended up having to deal with people who already came with their own preconceived answers and solutions without bothering to do that at all.
The one I couldnt stand just kept lecturing me on theory and models of cbt most of which i was aware of already. I was suffering with these terrible headaches which I believed were all pyschological but meant doing anything was a struggle. He told me to just get on with things, write down the worst thing that would happen to me and it probably would.
I dont care if thats the theory or not, it wasnt what I wanted or needed and didnt help. Just made me upset.
At its core it feels like we all wanted to be listened to and heard but ended up having to deal with people who already came with their own preconceived answers and solutions without bothering to do that at all.
The one I couldnt stand just kept lecturing me on theory and models of cbt most of which i was aware of already. I was suffering with these terrible headaches which I believed were all pyschological but meant doing anything was a struggle. He told me to just get on with things, write down the worst thing that would happen to me and it probably would.
I dont care if thats the theory or not, it wasnt what I wanted or needed and didnt help. Just made me upset.
CPLforever
Winger
These stories make me despair.
I wonder if the difference in my experience was I had a great GP? She really went into bat for me and still does. It was still hard, don't get me wrong but I persevered. I think it was compounded by a pathological fear of not being believed kept me propelling forward.
But ultimately if I didn't have the support of my GP I think I may have faltered.
Can I suggest something. Would any of you consider asking to see your medical records? I got mine and read through them. They were quite interesting and highlighted a couple of "misunderstandings" "miscommunication", and a wee bit dismissiveness. This helped me in terms of what I felt I should highlight down the line.
Five-Quarter
Midfield
That sounds like the very same script
Childhood - daily life
The things I wanted to address he didn't want to
Then felt like I was being challenged to dismiss what I wanted to raise
Why do you feel like that? I don't frigging know man that's why am talking to you
That's normal- it frigging isn't like
My behaviour/ thoughts / emotions can be quite erratic and random - some people are just random
I need to sort some things out I can't face it just now - Why? Because it'll tip me over the edge just now ya massive pillock
On and on with the script
No hoovering for a few days???, @Gillythedilf would give you a good crack!
I did used to get beaten up when he didn't think I'd done enough housework.
That is f***ing awful mate and am so so sorry and sorry I haven't been replying much to everyone just been sleeping a lot more recently but keep going everyone and its heartbreaking and maddening the amount of times that I have read where you all have been let down by the system in some way
. What someone before said where people just want to be listened to is spot on and that's all you sometimes want/need , Take care all and keep going 
.
CPLforever
Winger
Sorry, I reckon I should scroll through past posts to see if you or someone already mentioned it but have you heard of EDMR? It's a sort of trauma based therapy and can be quite difficult as there is an element of reliving the trauma to be able to cope with it.
Sorry if it's SEB (ha ha i like using SMB parlance) but have a look and take it to your mental health practitioners as a possibility
No I've not heard of that, but I'll google it and look into it.
I've been on a proper downer today. Had a horrible headache as well. Think I'll just write the day off!
Thats awful. I hope you seen the post in the jest it was intended.
Tomorrow is another day mate so yeah write today off and try again tomorrow, just don't give in
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