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Depression

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Becs said:
Struggling. I went through menopause way too early because I had surgery to remove my uterus and ovaries as I had endometriosis and PMDD. Menopause has badly affected my joints. I have osteoarthritis now and it's affected my bladder. I'm struggling to do my job as my joints and my body aches so much. I'm on my feet all day and it's a physical job with some heavy lifting. I've had to buy flat old lady shoes as my feet hurt so much.

I'm also in an active crohn's flare. As well as bowel pain, extreme wind and diahorrea, the flare also causes inflammation in joints, fatigue and I've got open sores in my mouth. I'm on a high dose of prednisolone to try and settle that down. The side effects of that drug include insomnia, extreme hunger and fatigue.

This week I've caught a cold. As I'm immunosuppressed, I struggle to fight off simple bugs. I've got chest pain, thick mucus and a cough from that.

I'm struggling to do my job and struggling to do things around the house. The bairn has been helping out, but she's behind in her A-Levels due to the school disruption from RAAC so I feel guilty being a burden on her when she's stressed about school. I've been applying for less physical jobs, but not had any luck yet.

Work in general is bad. Combination of having to do school runs to Durham twice a day as there are no buses and there are roadworks everywhere, so I waste so much time stuck in traffic. I'm stressed all the time about work and getting it done. I'm freelance and paid per call, so the longer I spend sitting in the car, the less calls I can do and the less I earn. There's only my wage coming in and I need to support my daughter. I can't afford to take sick leave as ESA is about £70 a week and I wouldn't get any help with housing as I'm in a mortgaged home. It's a ballache claiming it as you have to jump through hoops and be interrogated to prove you really are sick and I can't be arsed with the hassle of the DWP.

It's all got to me today. I've burst into tears several times and I've just had enough of feeling unwell and struggling to work.

My watch has a body battery and measures body stress. As a comparison, here's today compared with one of the days I was off work in October.

Logon or register to see this image
Click to expand...
Yeah, but apart from that......?
 

MigsGoalKicks said:
I’ve had my first appointment with a psychiatrist today. He’s confirmed I have panic disorder and prescribed me Pregabalin alongside my Mirtazapine. Anyone had any experience of this drug?
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I was on mirtazipine for 2 year between 2017 and 19. I have social anxiety with the occasional low mood (burnout) and would say that for the most part I found it to be OK. It's hard to remember now tbh. Side effects were slight nausea at first and long term, weight gain, the latter I actually liked as I've always been too slim. That dropped off within 6 or so months.

Remember everyone has different experiences with meds with regards to how much they help. I stopped mine after going on holiday, forgetting the meds and after withdrawal symptoms, decided to see how I was without. If I was to go back on meds, it would Mirtazipine. It was a much better experience than Citalopram & others I've had in the past.

Good luck, hopefully you'll be feeling better soon.
 
Becs said:
Some men on here are taking the piss out of my health. I PM'd one and asked him to leave me alone. To be fair, he sent an apology, but then his mate tagged him in another horrible comment referring to me and they started again. I was already at the end of my tether with other stuff and didn't deal with that well last night. Sorry for posting last night. I just needed to get it out as I was chewed up and ruminating.

Speaking of ruminating, the man who assaulted me and my children posts on here. Seeing his name gives me flashbacks to stuff that happened, like me being pinned on the floor by my throat while he punched me in the chest or he held my son against the wall by his chest and punched him in the face. I wish he'd fuck off. He's the biggest mistake I made in my life and my children were harmed because I met him.
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Absolutely shocking. There are obviously some *rseholes that have access to here. Try to forget the past, I accept it's not easy for you or your children but put what you term a "mistake" behind you.

And equally importantly, I hope the job opportunity transpires so you can move forward with that side of things. Gradually they will all fall into place for the better.

That's life if you're positive! Look forward not back.

Footnote: People make mistakes, it's all about getting over them.
 
GTG said:
I just read your follow up post and would hope you would have read mine in the spirit in which it was intended!?!

Btw, the offer I made last year still stands.
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Oh yes, I knew it was meant in good spirit. You're a good un and I appreciate what you've said before xx
 
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Kubicki85 said:
I was on mirtazipine for 2 year between 2017 and 19. I have social anxiety with the occasional low mood (burnout) and would say that for the most part I found it to be OK. It's hard to remember now tbh. Side effects were slight nausea at first and long term, weight gain, the latter I actually liked as I've always been too slim. That dropped off within 6 or so months.

Remember everyone has different experiences with meds with regards to how much they help. I stopped mine after going on holiday, forgetting the meds and after withdrawal symptoms, decided to see how I was without. If I was to go back on meds, it would Mirtazipine. It was a much better experience than Citalopram & others I've had in the past.

Good luck, hopefully you'll be feeling better soon.
Click to expand...

I’ve been on Mirtazapine for years. 45mg which I think is the highest dose. I’ll probably be on it for the rest of my life. It’s pregabalin I want to find out about. I had a terrible reaction when taking sertraline in the past so always a bit concerned when taking a new medication. The psychiatrist told me all the side effects of it so I know my brain will give me these symptoms.
 
Becs said:
Struggling. I went through menopause way too early because I had surgery to remove my uterus and ovaries as I had endometriosis and PMDD. Menopause has badly affected my joints. I have osteoarthritis now and it's affected my bladder. I'm struggling to do my job as my joints and my body aches so much. I'm on my feet all day and it's a physical job with some heavy lifting. I've had to buy flat old lady shoes as my feet hurt so much.

I'm also in an active crohn's flare. As well as bowel pain, extreme wind and diahorrea, the flare also causes inflammation in joints, fatigue and I've got open sores in my mouth. I'm on a high dose of prednisolone to try and settle that down. The side effects of that drug include insomnia, extreme hunger and fatigue.

This week I've caught a cold. As I'm immunosuppressed, I struggle to fight off simple bugs. I've got chest pain, thick mucus and a cough from that.

I'm struggling to do my job and struggling to do things around the house. The bairn has been helping out, but she's behind in her A-Levels due to the school disruption from RAAC so I feel guilty being a burden on her when she's stressed about school. I've been applying for less physical jobs, but not had any luck yet.

Work in general is bad. Combination of having to do school runs to Durham twice a day as there are no buses and there are roadworks everywhere, so I waste so much time stuck in traffic. I'm stressed all the time about work and getting it done. I'm freelance and paid per call, so the longer I spend sitting in the car, the less calls I can do and the less I earn. There's only my wage coming in and I need to support my daughter. I can't afford to take sick leave as ESA is about £70 a week and I wouldn't get any help with housing as I'm in a mortgaged home. It's a ballache claiming it as you have to jump through hoops and be interrogated to prove you really are sick and I can't be arsed with the hassle of the DWP.

It's all got to me today. I've burst into tears several times and I've just had enough of feeling unwell and struggling to work.

My watch has a body battery and measures body stress. As a comparison, here's today compared with one of the days I was off work in October.

Logon or register to see this image
Click to expand...
Really, really sorry to read this Becs.
 
Becs said:
Struggling. I went through menopause way too early because I had surgery to remove my uterus and ovaries as I had endometriosis and PMDD. Menopause has badly affected my joints. I have osteoarthritis now and it's affected my bladder. I'm struggling to do my job as my joints and my body aches so much. I'm on my feet all day and it's a physical job with some heavy lifting. I've had to buy flat old lady shoes as my feet hurt so much.

I'm also in an active crohn's flare. As well as bowel pain, extreme wind and diahorrea, the flare also causes inflammation in joints, fatigue and I've got open sores in my mouth. I'm on a high dose of prednisolone to try and settle that down. The side effects of that drug include insomnia, extreme hunger and fatigue.

This week I've caught a cold. As I'm immunosuppressed, I struggle to fight off simple bugs. I've got chest pain, thick mucus and a cough from that.

I'm struggling to do my job and struggling to do things around the house. The bairn has been helping out, but she's behind in her A-Levels due to the school disruption from RAAC so I feel guilty being a burden on her when she's stressed about school. I've been applying for less physical jobs, but not had any luck yet.

Work in general is bad. Combination of having to do school runs to Durham twice a day as there are no buses and there are roadworks everywhere, so I waste so much time stuck in traffic. I'm stressed all the time about work and getting it done. I'm freelance and paid per call, so the longer I spend sitting in the car, the less calls I can do and the less I earn. There's only my wage coming in and I need to support my daughter. I can't afford to take sick leave as ESA is about £70 a week and I wouldn't get any help with housing as I'm in a mortgaged home. It's a ballache claiming it as you have to jump through hoops and be interrogated to prove you really are sick and I can't be arsed with the hassle of the DWP.

It's all got to me today. I've burst into tears several times and I've just had enough of feeling unwell and struggling to work.

My watch has a body battery and measures body stress. As a comparison, here's today compared with one of the days I was off work in October.

Logon or register to see this image
Click to expand...
On consideration, this post becomes more & more horrendous. I'm sorry it's taken me this amount of time to fully grasp the potential ongoing effects.
 
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D.A said:
Hi, I've mentioned before I work for the foundation of light. We offer a telephone call service if anyone wants to chew the fat. Very informal. Message or reply if you're interested.
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Hello mate.


That’s nice of you to offer and hopefully the folk who are struggling get the help they need.

I’m down the beach with the dog every weekend so if anyone needs a walk, chat and a coffee Im happy for anyone to tag along. It personally does me wonders.


Thanks.
 
Hi all. Hope everyone is doing best they can.

Not posted on here for a while. After a bad start to the year and off in sick for few month.

Now back to work. On citalopram. Just had my dosage upped as I was slipping a few month ago.

Always going to be a struggle. Been 12 year now I’ve struggled. Start of this year I was closest I’ve ever been to ending it.

Was taking the dog out and had the rope in tree.

Anyone who suffers and thinks they are alone they are not. Even on here. It’s helped me loads. Is it is hard to talk to people.

If anyone needs a chat just message. Hope we are keeping on. Love Rhubarb. X
 
Rhubarb said:
Hi all. Hope everyone is doing best they can.

Not posted on here for a while. After a bad start to the year and off in sick for few month.

Now back to work. On citalopram. Just had my dosage upped as I was slipping a few month ago.

Always going to be a struggle. Been 12 year now I’ve struggled. Start of this year I was closest I’ve ever been to ending it.

Was taking the dog out and had the rope in tree.

Anyone who suffers and thinks they are alone they are not. Even on here. It’s helped me loads. Is it is hard to talk to people.

If anyone needs a chat just message. Hope we are keeping on. Love Rhubarb. X
Click to expand...
Same goes to you pal if you ever need a chat or feeling down we all here for you ❤️.
@D.A and @Gillythedilf 👏 what a lovely offer as costs nothing to be kind.
 
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Becs said:
Some men on here are taking the piss out of my health. I PM'd one and asked him to leave me alone. To be fair, he sent an apology, but then his mate tagged him in another horrible comment referring to me and they started again. I was already at the end of my tether with other stuff and didn't deal with that well last night. Sorry for posting last night. I just needed to get it out as I was chewed up and ruminating.

Speaking of ruminating, the man who assaulted me and my children posts on here. Seeing his name gives me flashbacks to stuff that happened, like me being pinned on the floor by my throat while he punched me in the chest or he held my son against the wall by his chest and punched him in the face. I wish he'd fuck off. He's the biggest mistake I made in my life and my children were harmed because I met him.



Can you send details of the EDF job please?

I'm contemplating home working. The little bedroom has a child's bed in it that nobody ever sleeps in and a load of clothes and toys that that bairn has grown out of and it all just got dumped in there out the way. I was thinking if I got rid of the junk and redecorated it, I could make a better home office than the one I have now. I've currently got my desk in the utility room which is functional but it's draughty as the window needs replacing and it's north facing so dull in there on cloudy days. I also think it looks crap when I'm on video calls with the washing machine and dryer in the background.


It's awkward as most of her friends who live here went to other sixth forms. I'm also picking my son up from his house on Tues and Weds and taking him to college and back as he can't get there. I'm following the bus strike thread on here and hoping they can find a breakthrough and get back to running the buses soon.
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I trust you've reported them and they've been banned. I find it incredible that people take the piss out of someone's Ill health.

Most of the local Councils are struggling to find people to fill roles. Might be worth you checking out whether there are any jobs you could apply for.
 
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