Couples who don’t have kids.

dixonsafc said:
I have zero interest in having kids.

I enjoy my free time and extra money, and have zero paternal instinct whatsoever. Kids are f***ing horrible. There's no chance to send the fuckers back if you don't fancy it either, you've got a minimum 18 year commitment.

All my mates that have kids look miserable all the time.
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Load of shit that lad, your mates who have kids aren’t miserable at all they’ve been given the best gift that life can give them. Nothing comes close to having a child and it is honestly the meaning of life
 


Ramshanker said:
fair play, I'd be shit in sales, I'm too nice
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It's not being nasty, or ripping people off. It's just making sure you sell them your stuff, instead of someone else getting the deal.
I'm a nice guy.😁
safcforver said:
Load of shit that lad, your mates who have kids aren’t miserable at all they’ve been given the best gift that life can give them. Nothing comes close to having a child and it is honestly the meaning of life
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In your opinion.

Deeper minds than yours or mine have pondered the meaning of life mate, for thousands of years, and never come to such a succinct conclusion.
 
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Georgewhitt said:
It's not being nasty, or ripping people off. It's just making sure you sell them your stuff, instead of someone else getting the deal.
I'm a nice guy.😁

In your opinion.

Deeper minds than yours or mine have pondered the meaning of life mate, for thousands of years, and never come to such a succinct conclusion.
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Don’t care about any other opinion. Nothing will bring you happiness than a dependant child learning and growing from you
 
safcforver said:
Don’t care about any other opinion. Nothing will bring you happiness than a dependant child learning and growing from you
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In your opinion.
You have absolutely no idea what brings me happiness, and it is arrogant in the extreme to tell me what will or won't bring me that happiness.
If your experience of parenthood makes you feel that way, then brilliant. I'm glad for you, but do not presume that anyone who has not experienced it, either through circumstance or choice, is somehow getting less joy from life.
 
My ex-wife and I never wanted them. She is even less maternal than I was paternal. I did used to want to have children for a long time, because I suffered serious emotional abuse as a child and wanted to give someone a better life than I had. Thankfully I didn't as it is a bad reason for having children and I was later diagnosed with complex trauma, and there is a good chance I would have passed that trauma on to a child. And that leads on to what I think is a far more important matter - people often have children for terrible reasons like trying to fix broken relationships, religious expectation, parental expectations etc.

My partner has a daughter who I love as my own. Parenting her is one of the most natural things in the world to me. I haven't a conscious clue what I am doing, but know exactly what I am not doing.
 
Mackem DJ said:
I dont mean those poor souls who *want* kids but medically can’t have them. My heart genuinely goes out to these folks. But what’s the craic with couples who just never have kids?

Don’t get me wrong, generally I hate other peoples kids and my own drive me to distraction at times. They cause me loads of aggravation raising them in a generation where they are constantly being influenced by dickheads & act up accordingly.

That said I can’t really grasp why couples chose not to have kids, other than to indulge themselves for as long as possible in their lives? And not have to ‘share’ their love.

I get the distinct impression many of the SMB are either single or they are divorced or are in deeply unhappy marriages so it’ll be interesting to get peoples thoughts.
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I never wanted kids, I have two of my own and the Mrs (no) has one as well.

Got to be honest, as much as I love my kids I still would have preferred to be childless.
 
Most men know or I've met who had kids ended up getting turfed out to live in a flat and have to give a decent chunk of their earnings to their ex.

The other men I know in relationships with kids are completely under the thumb, because they're scared to become the guys in the first example I gave.

Met an awful lot of terrible blokes with kids that make that their one thing to prove what a great person with a warm heart they are; rather than say, ooh I dunno, treating EVERYONE kindly. "Oh my kids are my world, I'd do anything for them." blah blah f***ing blah. How about everyone else who you trample all over? How about being decent to them?
 
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safcforver said:
Load of shit that lad, your mates who have kids aren’t miserable at all they’ve been given the best gift that life can give them. Nothing comes close to having a child and it is honestly the meaning of life
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I’ve spoken to at least two of the lads who love their kids to bits but have said that given a chance to go back they’d chose not to have kids.

It’s obviously something that’s very important in your life, which there’s nothing wrong with. I personally couldn’t think of anything worse.
 
dixonsafc said:
I’ve spoken to at least two of the lads who love their kids to bits but have said that given a chance to go back they’d chose not to have kids.

It’s obviously something that’s very important in your life, which there’s nothing wrong with. I personally couldn’t think of anything worse.
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Really!!

‘ Can’t think of anything worse’

Than experience the biggest joy in life bar none!

weird statement that from you mates like ‘ love their kids to bits’ but it had chance to go back would not want them!!

Can’t love them to bits that much then!!
 
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Voice of fair play said:
Really!!

‘ Can’t think of anything worse’

Than experience the biggest joy in life bar none!

weird statement that from you mates like ‘ love their kids to bits’ but it had chance to go back would not want them!!

Can’t love them to bits that much then!!
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It may be to you, and that's fair enough but I don't have a paternal bone in my body.

I appreciate my opinion is the outlier, but I don't see why I would have kids because of social convention and that other people think it's good when I don't want to?

You'd have to take that up with them, I'm just repeating what they've said to me.
 
Let’s get down to business here shall we and look at it as it actually is on an animalistic basis as that’s what we are animals.



If a woman doesn’t want kids at any stage of her life then it’s rather peculiar don’t you think?Hormones not right or something.It’s in there DNA to carry bairns and look after them ,just as it’s in blokes to stick their Chucky in owt with a frock on.
 
dixonsafc said:
It may be to you, and that's fair enough but I don't have a paternal bone in my body.

I appreciate my opinion is the outlier, but I don't see why I would have kids because of social convention and that other people think it's good when I don't want to?

You'd have to take that up with them, I'm just repeating what they've said to me.
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I know a couple of lads who say the same. I’m quite lucky that I don’t get pestered about when I’ll change my mind and have some. Most of my family understand my position and most of my mates, including the ones with kids, are jealous and say they wish they’d done the same.

People have a very romantic idea of having children and say things like “it’s the greatest joy / love” but I’ve watched people who say that crap become depressed, break down, divorce as a result even if they don’t realise it. The stress, tiredness, financial and social burden they bring can wreck people and their marriages.

There’s plenty of kids who have disabilities or who grow up with serious issues from external factors that can essentially ruin your life. Obviously you don’t necessarily see it that way if it happens to you and your child but it does. I’ve got a lot of family members who’ve got physical or mental issues who I love to bits but I wouldn’t want to bring someone into the world who had to go through what they did.
 
We have two boys. They are grown up and living their own lives. We raised them to be adventurous and spread their wings which they have done. We are now back to being on our own. I've enjoyed all parts of parenthood and continue to do so. Can't imagine not having had those experiences and not having two lovely human beings in my life now.
 

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