Universal Truths

[MackemBob]

The person in the middle seat in a row at the theatre is the last to arrive, and the first to disappear for a piss before arriving back after everyone else.

Any others?

 

[Chai Relax]

Whenever I'm running late for work I get stuck behind someone doing 30 on 60 roads, who then speed up and do 40 along the 30s

 

[CheersMarra84]

The person in the middle seat in a row at the theatre is the last to arrive, and the first to disappear for a piss before arriving back after everyone else.

Any others?

What did you go to see mate?

 

[Walter Ego]

Whenever I'm running late for work I get stuck behind someone doing 30 on 60 roads, who then speed up and do 40 along the 30s

Cut them a bit of slack, they’ll be juggling a slice of toast no doubt.

 

[Idlewild Mackem]

Mags are *****

 

[MackemBob]

What did you go to see mate?

The Snow Queen. Was canny.

 

[Kevj]

You can always tell if a person is a theatre goer vegan.

 

[PeteFTM]

No matter which urinal you pick, there will always be a cock watcher lurking near

 

[Will e]

No matter how much you shake your peg the last drop always goes down your leg.

Taken from a bog wall when I was a bairn.

 

[Space Hopper]

Despite constant warning, you have never met anybody who has had their arm broken by a swan.

 

[Big Sharp Teeth]

People who ‘tell it like it is’ generally only spout prejudiced and inaccurate narratives that bear little relation to the reality of how ‘it is’.

 

[PinzaC55]

If an argument goes on for more than 5 minutes both sides have lost.

 

[Kevj]

If an argument goes on for more than 5 minutes both sides have lost.

May as well shut this place down then

 

[PinzaC55]

May as well shut this place down then

No argument from me

 

[monkeytassle]

Opening packets of tablets.

 

[Cockney Mackem]

Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards. It makes them soggy and hard to light.

Do not throw cigarettes into the toilet. For they are prone to anger

 

[jcrossan]

There no longer is universal truth. People argue about everything.

If Trump announced the sun rises in the west at least 25 million Americans would believe him

 

[The Raven]

There is no right or wrong anymore just public opinion.

 

[PinzaC55]

A + (not A) = everything.

 

[JAZZMANB]

People who say Cut a long story short ,rarely do