New idea to stop motorcycle theft

[The Mole]

Just had an idea.
Make all motorcycles start only by inputting a card which shows the rider has a licence and is insured. Like a slot in place of the ignition

Would stop all motorcycle stealing overnight. Plus riders not insured or who haven’t passed their test.

Still working on the finer details tho

 

[Hettonlass]

Have you applied to Dragons Den?

 

[Walter Ego]

Great idea that mate.

 

[RichD]

Just had an idea.
Make all motorcycles start only by inputting a card which shows the rider has a licence and is insured. Like a slot in place of the ignition

Would stop all motorcycle stealing overnight. Plus riders not insured or who haven’t passed their test.

Still working on the finer details tho

What happens when the bike thefts just clone the card ? plus what happens if you own the bike but don't ride it ?

 

[look out piano]

Some sort of manual contraption that senses the hands on the handlebars aren't the owners, metal bits come out like handcuffs and attach their hands to said handlebars, then the bike starts up automatically and goes to 100mph in a straight line and the brakes don't work..........that'll learn em.

 

[Goat Eyes]

Surely you can just push the bike away? no card required.

f***ing woeful, ill thought out idea this. What a dribbler.

This is one for you to pitch to JML at best.

 

[Big Sharp Teeth]

If I had a bike I’d do it up so the engine was on a swivel. Every time I parked it I’d spin the engine round 180 degrees so if someone did steal it they’d shoot off backwards when they tried to ride it away. They’d probably end up in a river or a cream cake shop. Just desserts I’d say! Ho ho.

 

[Escape Velocity]

No good when the cards start getting cloned.

 

[lucky]

Surely you can just push the bike away? no card required.

f***ing woeful, ill thought out idea this. What a dribbler.

This is one for you to pitch to JML at best.

JML have some absoloute shit , Can you remember the little magazines what you got through the door ( or with the papers ) stuff like manual video rewinders and general shit .

 

[Cockney Mackem]

How about some sort of scanner in the seat which is imprinted on the unique signature of the owner's genitals, bumhole and gooch?

 

[Boinger]

Surely you can just push the bike away? no card required.

f***ing woeful, ill thought out idea this. What a dribbler.

This is one for you to pitch to JML at best.

 

[Dan..Dan..Dan..Dan]

Just make the wheels 'quick release'. You can take them off when you park up and wear the wheels as smashing earrings.

 

[Snugster]

JML have some absoloute shit , Can you remember the little magazines what you got through the door ( or with the papers ) stuff like manual video rewinders and general shit

Betterware catalogues!
Some of the products looked like they came from Viz.
My wife would order stuff cos she felt sorry for the bloke that delivered.

 

[cornish mackem]

My mates Vespa was taken, lifted into a van and gone from sight.
Many bike thefts are not riden away

How about some sort of scanner in the seat which is imprinted on the unique signature of the owner's genitals, bumhole and gooch?

The AA breakdown people have a tag on their belts and a receiver in the seat. If that tag doesn’t sit in the drivers seat, the van doesn’t go anywhere

 

[Boinger]

Betterware catalogues!
Some of the products looked like they came from Viz.
My wife would order stuff cos she felt sorry for the bloke that delivered.

Speaking of which.... an upgrade of OPs original idea?

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[Billericay Dichio]

Death sentence for the thief. I'm going all Nottingham thread on this one.

 

[Tuono]

Just had an idea.
Make all motorcycles start only by inputting a card which shows the rider has a licence and is insured. Like a slot in place of the ignition

Would stop all motorcycle stealing overnight. Plus riders not insured or who haven’t passed their test.

Still working on the finer details tho

You're 30 years too late. Honda have had "credit card" keyed bikes since 1993.

 

[sidneyeric]

Allow the use of force to stop them (ie knock them off) without repercussions.

 

[Dan..Dan..Dan..Dan]

Betterware catalogues!

I recall the Innovations catalogues?

 

[STUMPY]

Allow the use of force to stop them (ie knock them off) without repercussions.

Great idea in principle but don't forget the bike could get scratched