Ins/Outs: March

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Striker
In:
Cricket jumpers
Lois jeans
Deep pile fleeces
Best Company
Watermelon Extra
Schlager
Giving wedgies
Bottle green wedge haircuts
Waxed jackets
Lemons
Doing the do
Getting the round in a Belgian accent
Ralph Lauren
Hats that make you look like you’re a forest trooper from Return of the Jedi
Tripping up people with beards
The hidden Maori corner at Grindon
Expensive gloves
Raclettes
Peeping through hedges

Out:
Saturday night TV
Sunderland’s inability to hold onto a lead
Soccer AM
Twat-panted bodybuilders
Steak
Tattoos
Fortnite
Drug bores
Tea
People dressing like a casual from 1985
Allergies
Thai food
Brogues
People who arselick Charlie Methven when they see him out
Vulgar tom
Shouty loud twats
Footballers’ dress sense
 


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