Disappearance of Sarah Everard in London

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monkeytassle said:
I'm playing devil's advocate as usual. It simply isn't right that a woman cannot walk home in the dark without fear of being attacked. Similarly I felt terrible walking behind a lady to pick my daughter up from school because I could sense she was clearly uncomfortable.

Maybe the issue is the judicial system
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I think in all honesty part of the answer is men calling out other men for misogyny. I'm not being snipey and I'm not tarring all men with the same brush. I just think men can play a huge role by telling other men it's not acceptable if they hear it. This would go a long way to making misogyny unacceptable.
 
janiep said:
I hate that they used the word 'opportunistic'. It feels really wrong. This is a hate crime, you have to really, really hate women to do something like this to a woman, you have to think that they're shit and not human. Using the word 'opportunisitic' also has a subtext which believe me women pick up: 'don't give them the opportunity, girls'. I.e. putting the onus for containing shocking male behaviour onto women yet again, exactly what so many people have been calling out this week.
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How would you label a man raping a man?
 
monkeytassle said:
I just find it incredibly confusing. If an attractive woman walks past me in the street do I look? Yes of course. Do I wolf whistle. No. Do I slap her arse. No. Would I mind if the roles were reversed and the lady looked at my adonis like body lustfully. No.

Seems to boil down to behaving appropriately which sadly it seems like many are incapable of.

We're supposed to be attracted to the opposite sex
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Plus women look just as much as men. They are just better at hiding it. Where it goes over the top & weird is blokes following them and not taking no for an answer.

Men don't take rejection well.
 
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monkeytassle said:
How would you label a man raping a man?
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A rapist.

Two men of my acquaintance were raped as children, one by his scout master and one by his brother. I have talked to both of them long and deeply about it. I have seen how it shattered their souls, just as it does to women. They are both wonderful men who I (platonically) love. I take the issue of male rape very seriously and so forgive me if I don't engage in message board chit chat about it. Not having a go.
 
janiep said:
I think in all honesty part of the answer is men calling out other men for misogyny. I'm not being snipey and I'm not tarring all men with the same brush. I just think men can play a huge role by telling other men it's not acceptable if they hear it. This would go a long way to making misogyny unacceptable.
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I agree. My team at work got too laddy so we levelled or up with female employees (my initiative). I was called a dirty old man doing so. Funnily enough team is awesome and the best thing is we are are all very relaxed when it comes to daft innuendo and jokes as we're consenting adults
janiep said:
A rapist.

Two men of my acquaintance were raped as children, one by his scout master and one by his brother. I have talked to both of them long and deeply about it. I have seen how it shattered their souls, just as it does to women. They are both wonderful men who I (platonically) love. I take the issue of male rape very seriously and so forgive me if I don't engage in message board chit chat about it. Not having a go.
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Would it be a hate crime?
 
janiep said:
Builders tend not to wolf whistle now. It's taken very seriously. Builders of my acquaintance tell me if it happens, and a woman complains to the council, the council will like as not shut the site down. Good.
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This is part of the problem women don’t complain or report incidents enough if they did the stats would be even more horrific and might lead to something being done I hope there’s a campaign to encourage more women to report their experiences we can’t go on like this
 
janiep said:
I hate that they used the word 'opportunistic'. It feels really wrong. This is a hate crime, you have to really, really hate women to do something like this to a woman, you have to think that they're shit and not human. Using the word 'opportunisitic' also has a subtext which believe me women pick up: 'don't give them the opportunity, girls'. I.e. putting the onus for containing shocking male behaviour onto women yet again, exactly what so many people have been calling out this week.
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What annoys me the most is that piece of shit saw an innocent young woman walking along and decided that he wanted her, that he would take her and that he would murder her. A woman doing nothing wrong, just walking home, minding her own business and now she's dead.
 
monkeytassle said:
I agree. My team at work got too laddy so we levelled or up with female employees (my initiative). I was called a dirty old man doing so. Funnily enough team is awesome and the best thing is we are are all very relaxed when it comes to daft innuendo and jokes as we're consenting adults

Would it be a hate crime?
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a) That's good, but I've got to be honest a team culture of innuendo and jokes is a bit .... well, I hope you're sure they're all OK with it.

b) Yes. I belive their rapists treated them like they were pieces of shit and not human.
 
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janiep said:
a) That's good, but I've got to be honest a team culture of innuendo and jokes is a bit .... well, I hope you're sure they're all OK with it.

b) Yes. I belive their rapists treated them like they were pieces of shit and not human.
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Ok so b) means it's non gender specifc?
 
It obviously affects women more than men but i don't think walking home alone at that time of night along deserted streets would be particularly safe for anyone.
 
janiep said:
Because for one night it would be lovely to walk the streets safely.

It's not a serious suggestion by the way, it's meant to get men thinking because of course it's not all men, but it is every woman - all of us, every single one of us, does not feel safe a lot of the time.
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“Every single woman doesnt feel safe a lot of the time.”

Canny statement. i’m a terrible generaliser, i do it all the time when trying to get a point across but f***ing hell thats some craic :lol:
 
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