Depression

[Hair Flick]

If i was gay I probably wouldn't have this problem of lonliness, for some bizarre reason I'm seemingly attractive to gay lads!

Well then it's obvious.

Go gay, act camp as owt, then wait for a lass to come along and try and turn you straight. Job's a good un.

 

[ChrisAshley]

Well I like you mate. Your one of my favourite posters, you have good craic to me.

Times can be shit but things get better and things do turnaround. I used to be a recluse about 5/6 years ago. Used to just watch tv and eat takeaways when I finished work. Then I started to stick in at the gym and met a proper wad at work in 2011, it fuelled me more for the gym and my confidence skyrocketed. We ended after 6 months but after break up I realised there were loads of lasses to buck and I had loads of new mates through playing sports I hadn't played in years. However in last few years I have had few relationships, some really shit ones too and its not all its cracked up to be, but I do remember the person I was 5 years ago would give his right bollock for what I have/had in last few years.

Set yourself little goals whatever they maybe and good luck mate.

cheers mate, I've been meaning to go the gym and did get my own weight set but need to properly get myself motivated for it, plus probably better going to the gym is better in meeting new people or more lasses to laugh at me.

Cracking post marra. Can't recommend exercise of any sort enough @ChrisAshley mate. Transformation doesn't happen overnight but your self confidence will sky rocket and better things will come of that.

Instead of running away from your problems try something as simple as this first. Put it this way mate, the next 6 months are going to go past anyway, you can either choose to spend them sitting around overthinking and putting yourself in a bad place or you can dedicate it to this and see where you end up. What's to lose here, it's win-win?

Make a promise to yourself that you will go to the gym 3-4 times a week, get on the D&E forum for any tips, questions you might have and track your progress. Write down how you feel after sessions, set little weekly targets or goals to achieve and write down how you feel when you hit them. Diarise all this so you can look back on it and then do something like take a photo now and then one in 6 months to see how far you've gone and how much you've achieved.

Aye I keep thinking about getting in shape but don't bother to do anything about it, I was skinny up till a couple of years ago now my weight is shooting up, gonna end up fat if I don't do anything about it. Got the problem of not having a job at the moment though.

Well then it's obvious.

Go gay, act camp as owt, then wait for a lass to come along and try and turn you straight. Job's a good un.

@alexander told me to do that.

 

[becs]

I can't recommend this one enough:

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If you buy it, buy the eBook version as it contains audio files guiding you through the meditations.

And yes, you must focus on the positive things about being the amazing person that is you, and give yourself a cuddle for being so fabulous.

Downloaded it onto my tablet. My daughter goes to a gymnastics class tonight. I can't watch it and the building is in the middle of nowhere, so I just have to sit around for an hour. I'll start reading it then. Probably lose all the benefits of it when I watch the Hull match later mind

 

[Deleted member 5265]

Downloaded it onto my tablet. My daughter goes to a gymnastics class tonight. I can't watch it and the building is in the middle of nowhere, so I just have to sit around for an hour. I'll start reading it then. Probably lose all the benefits of it when I watch the Hull match later mind

Sounds like a plan. The good thong is you can just put your headphones on and close your eyes and do it whenever, wherever. Just be careful as the first time I did one of the meditations from the book i fell into a 12 hour sleep!

 

[becs]

Sounds like a plan. The good thong is you can just put your headphones on and close your eyes and do it whenever, wherever. Just be careful as the first time I did one of the meditations from the book i fell into a 12 hour sleep!

I'll be careful.

Another friend claims essential oils help her sleep and recommended burning camomile oil from here:

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I've ordered some and a burner and some lavender and I'm going to try burning them in my bedroom on an evening to see if they help.

 

[Silverfox1981]

I think of mindfullness as meditation re-branded.

It's by no means a new thing tho.

 

[johnson]

alright lads, had his for years, never been to a GP, try and deal with it myself, but might be getting too much at the minute.

Anyone here beat it without meds?

 

[Maravilla]

alright lads, had his for years, never been to a GP, try and deal with it myself, but might be getting too much at the minute.

Anyone here beat it without meds?

Was prescribed Sertraline when I first went to the doctors about it but they probably made things worse as they made me feel sick and drowsy, which drastically effected my performance at work. Once I knocked the meds on the head I felt so much better.

Obviously I wouldn't recommend that course of action for everyone but medication isn't an effective treatment of depression in every single case. Pretty sure someone else on here said they also coped better without medication, think it might have been @Flash Gordon. Apologies to the lad if I've got him confused with someone else.

 

[Pij]

There are 3 types of meds, SSRI's like citalopram, Tricyclic's like Trazadone, and mood stabilisers. each med should be given 3-4 weeks to work before an asessment is made on it's effectiveness - I'm on Epilim (primarily for Epilepsy) and for at least the first few weeks I was like a zombie, my brain adjusted and got used to it, I still have depression but it does take the edge off. Whenever I come off my meds I think I'm feeling alright for a few days, then have a really bad episode, meds are not the way forward for everyone, but do be aware that if one pill hasn't helped, there are others to try, and to give them fair chance to work.

 

[Georgey Squaat Pants]

has anyone tried any alternative therapies to help, im looking into it to help me with my illness.

Sorry, the book link doesnt show on my screen for some reason, whats it called please?

 

[becs]

alright lads, had his for years, never been to a GP, try and deal with it myself, but might be getting too much at the minute.

Anyone here beat it without meds?

I was prescribed mirtazapine but I really didn't get on with it. It makes me go to sleep about half an hour after taking it and I do sleep through. However, the next morning I was waking up with horrendous headaches and feeling nauseous. I felt sick, sluggish and tired for most of the day and I was worried about driving as my job involves driving from call to call.

I'm not taking anything at the moment, and looking for other ways to try and improve my sleep as I think insomnia is the biggest cause of my depression.

Sorry, the book link doesnt show on my screen for some reason, whats it called please?

Mindfulness: A practical guide to finding peace in a frantic world by Mark Williams.

 

[IrishMackem88]

Been hit hard with anxiety/depression over the past week or so!

Basically my mind was trying to make up things that I haven't actually thought?

Is this common at all? Was supposed to see a therapist the other day but she had to cancel due to being ill.

Feel lost at the minute, tried talking to my girlfriend and my mam, but I just need closure or something from a professional! I really can't understand why my mind is trying to play tricks on me and to bring me down?

 

[superdougle]

Been hit hard with anxiety/depression over the past week or so!

Basically my mind was trying to make up things that I haven't actually thought?

Is this common at all? Was supposed to see a therapist the other day but she had to cancel due to being ill.

Feel lost at the minute, tried talking to my girlfriend and my mam, but I just need closure or something from a professional! I really can't understand why my mind is trying to play tricks on me and to bring me down?

Google intrusive thoughts may be what you are having

 

[Pij]

Been hit hard with anxiety/depression over the past week or so!

Basically my mind was trying to make up things that I haven't actually thought?

Is this common at all? Was supposed to see a therapist the other day but she had to cancel due to being ill.

Feel lost at the minute, tried talking to my girlfriend and my mam, but I just need closure or something from a professional! I really can't understand why my mind is trying to play tricks on me and to bring me down?

Could be paranoia, which is common for those with depression, it also goes hand in hand with OCD. I have OCD tendencies as part of my CPTSD, basically your brain tries to compensate for feeling out of control, but tends to overcompensate. OCD presents in surprisingly non stereotypical ways, one of which is intrusive thoughts, such as visualising gory accidents, causing gory accidents, some very depraved and sick thoughts that make you feel guilty though you have no control over them. CBT therapy can be useful to 're-train' the brain. It might be a good idea to look into the different disorders mentioned, look at the symptoms and note anything you feel matches, and show that list to your therapist the next time you see them.

 

[IrishMackem88]

Could be paranoia, which is common for those with depression, it also goes hand in hand with OCD. I have OCD tendencies as part of my CPTSD, basically your brain tries to compensate for feeling out of control, but tends to overcompensate. OCD presents in surprisingly non stereotypical ways, one of which is intrusive thoughts, such as visualising gory accidents, causing gory accidents, some very depraved and sick thoughts that make you feel guilty though you have no control over them. CBT therapy can be useful to 're-train' the brain. It might be a good idea to look into the different disorders mentioned, look at the symptoms and note anything you feel matches, and show that list to your therapist the next time you see them.

Cheers pal! Going to a therapist in the next few days and to my GP tomorrow to see if he can help me in some way.

 

[Pij]

Cheers pal! Going to a therapist in the next few days and to my GP tomorrow to see if he can help me in some way.

Very welcome I'm waiting to start therapy soon, anxious ain't the word. GP's aren't much cop other than for physical illnesses and psych referrals, even if they can't offer much help though it'll be good to do as a proactive measure.

 

[IrishMackem88]

Very welcome I'm waiting to start therapy soon, anxious ain't the word. GP's aren't much cop other than for physical illnesses and psych referrals, even if they can't offer much help though it'll be good to do as a proactive measure.

Sorry to hear that you're battling too mate! It's an awful world out there when times are hard, but I guess staying strong and not letting depression/ocd/anxiety win is the main thing! Looking forward to getting over this bout I have and starting my life over again in a positive light!

All the best on your road to recovery pal!

 

[Fred]

I've been suffering from depressive thoughts for just over a year now and I am still struggling with it now.

I've read through a few of the posts on this thread and thought about what it is that is the cause of the problem, however the causes of the problem are the things that I don't want to lose at all.

First of all my 18 month old son is a big problem, due to him being hemiplegic (a form of cerebral palsy), and the second problem is my fiancee, who I presume is also having the same depressive thoughts that I am having.

My depressive thoughts are always on my son and whether he will learn to be able to walk properly or use his right hand at all and even if he can, whether this will lead to him getting bullied when he gets a bit older, due to my girlfriend (and maybe me aswell) wanting him to go through the conventional schools rather than special schools. Also while looking after a 18 month old, I am seriously having trouble having the patience to handle the screaming fits and temper tantrums, due to these depressive thoughts, which can suddenly turn to angry thoughts at the flick of a switch.

And to top it all off I feel like I can't seriously confide in my girlfriend at all, and I feel she feels the same way with me aswell, and all I can see is the cycle repeating over and over again until one of us finally snaps.

I also feel like I can't confide in a gp neither because if I am open and honest with them about everything, it might lead to social services etc getting involved due to it being both parents.

I know its a long winded post but if anyone reads through it I would seriously appreciate a bit of support and I will be eternally grateful.

 

[Sir Lancelot]

I am sorry for what you are going through and can understand how you feel as my daughter was born with problems too.

I think that you need to recognise that there is nothing you can do to change the situation. Your son will either be able to do things or he won't. You being miserable or your partner being miserable, will not change the outcome in any shape or form. So, you need to accept your son as he is and live with the uncertainty of how he will develop. If you can't do that then maybe your son needs to be in a different situation than with you and your partner.

I know this will seem to be a harsh way, but that's the reality. Cope with the situation, take joy from your son as he reaches his milestones in his own good time or move on and allow someone who accepts him as he is to take care of him.

Borrowing trouble by worrying about schools is ridiculous at this point.

 

[Rizla]

I've been suffering from depressive thoughts for just over a year now and I am still struggling with it now.

I've read through a few of the posts on this thread and thought about what it is that is the cause of the problem, however the causes of the problem are the things that I don't want to lose at all.

First of all my 18 month old son is a big problem, due to him being hemiplegic (a form of cerebral palsy), and the second problem is my fiancee, who I presume is also having the same depressive thoughts that I am having.

My depressive thoughts are always on my son and whether he will learn to be able to walk properly or use his right hand at all and even if he can, whether this will lead to him getting bullied when he gets a bit older, due to my girlfriend (and maybe me aswell) wanting him to go through the conventional schools rather than special schools. Also while looking after a 18 month old, I am seriously having trouble having the patience to handle the screaming fits and temper tantrums, due to these depressive thoughts, which can suddenly turn to angry thoughts at the flick of a switch.

And to top it all off I feel like I can't seriously confide in my girlfriend at all, and I feel she feels the same way with me aswell, and all I can see is the cycle repeating over and over again until one of us finally snaps.

I also feel like I can't confide in a gp neither because if I am open and honest with them about everything, it might lead to social services etc getting involved due to it being both parents.

I know its a long winded post but if anyone reads through it I would seriously appreciate a bit of support and I will be eternally grateful.

There will be many parents of children with disabilities suffering from anxiety and stress like you and your wife. If you approached your GP I am sure they would understand because they will have seen it before.

From what you've said, it sounds like counselling would help, you can go through your GP or go privately. If you try the Counselling Directory there are a lot of professionals out there and there will be some that specialise in relationships and families.