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Becoming a dad

My two are 12 and 7 and both of them make us proud every day.

Just today we met up with family who we haven't seen in almost 10 years since our wedding and there were 6 kids there between the ages of 12 and 18 months who had never met each other before. All played like they'd known each other for years and loved it, and my two kids have varying degrees of additional needs as well.

At times they've stressed me out and continue to stress me out but I dread to think of where I would be without them and the wife as my ADHD has got worse over the years myself.
 

Mine are 20 and 8.

Both absolutely amazing oldest lad works so hard going to uni,volunteering and working.

The little one is a hundred miles an hour never shuts up but my life would be so boring without him.

Yes they have the same Dad 😆 the question I get asked the most with the big age gap.
 
indymackem said:
My two year old has just started randomly whacking and flipping her lid at me which is.... wild. All sweet and pure until about now! I assume they go through phases?

Hard week like, but she's still comfortably the best thing to happen to us.
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My lad is 3 and a half and still goes through spells of doing this. He’s the softest, kindest kid but then has that switch where me and his mar are apparently his sworn enemies :lol:
 
Best wishes to all new Dads on here, it’s a great feeling. We have an 8 month old granddaughter who has just started crawling, unfortunately my daughter and SiL live in Dubai so me and the missus don’t seen enough of them. Now I’m retired I zoom them most days and it’s magical when the little one recognises me and smiles. They are coming to stay with us for a couple of weeks at the end of the month, can’t wait.
 
toxic tracksuit said:
Early days / weeks / months are awful. Ignore the twats who say 'ohmygod its amazing being a father, I feel complete as a man....etc' It's f***ing awful, hard work and we need to be honest with each other. You also have to support your missus who is equally as tired but has a bust fanny.
You get nothing back from the little shit pumping screaming sleep depraving nowt. Like a really demanding house plant.

THEN

ONE DAY

It smiles.
It sleeps for 6 hours solid
It says 'duh'
Your missus returns to (relative) normality

Then its amazing being a father, you feel complete as a man....
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This is so accurate.
 
We had our girls when we young compared to a lot these days. Our lass was only 19 when we fell pregnant with our first and no doubt our lives changed overnight.
The early years were great and we loved every minute, but people would be lying if they said it was all easy and stress free. We went for 8 years on just my wage as both our parents still worked full time, and for the actual amount of money we would have been better off her working, it was better for us for her not to work and fetch them up being there.

I'm now 39 and my girls are teenagers and absolutely class. We all have season tickets and make a day of it every time. It is quality when you can spend time your kids and have conversations about all sorts. They still have their moments as teenage girls, but I'm over the moon with the people have turned out to be.

My advice would be, don't take a minute for granted. I used to take them out all of time to make sure they kept active as little ones, but I couldn't tell you the last time they asked to go to the park for example. One day it just stopped.

As they turn into teenagers encourage them to be open and honest with you and make sure they are aware that they come to you with anything. My eldest now has a boyfriend which is a truly strange dynamic when they first come over. He's a lovely lad, but I know if there was ever an issue she would come to me as we have that trust.

And get them into the red and white heroes. We've already made memories to last a life time over the past few seasons.
 
We had our 2 quite young. Me and the wife (no) are 27 and have a girl and a boy (7 and 3). MY wife works every other weekend so for the last 6 or so years i've had full weekends where it's just me and the kids (she does 8-8 shifts). I've sort of decided it's my responsibility to make sure they both have hobbies and clubs they go to and tried to make it part of our weekend.

My boy goes to diddikicks every saturday lunchtime, and my daughter starts gymnastics clubs this sunday. It's become part of my weekend and i love seeing how much they come on by having that interraction with other kids. I don't think my wife appreciates is as much as i do and i think at times sees it as a bit of an inconvenience having to "sit through" their clubs, but i genuinely love and are probably as invested as the kids are for them to do well.

School holidays over the summer are on one hand great, as every time the weather is nice we try and do different things together. The 3 of us were down the beach all day last weekend, and i've done trips out to castle ruins etc. Always looking for new things. But on the other hand, i do get down at times when it is such a nice day and we're all out without my wife.

The biggest part of advice i would give is understand and appreciate very early on that the journey of being a dad with young children goes by so fast. And in a blink of an eye you no longer have "babies". My 7 year old is already looking like a teenager with her dress sense and attitude for example, and our son (who was always the baby in the family) starts full time school in september - time flies.

I was watching an old video of our daughter at 1 year old taking her first proper steps and it got me a bit emotional at how far we'd all come, as people, parents etc. So enjoy every moment no matter how hard it is, as i can guarantee there will be a point in time where you wish you could turn back the clock and re live it all.
 
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