f***ing leathal that stuff. I’m all minty fresh for the train down to Wembley, but me knackers are tingling like a bastard. There’s got to be some kind of North Korean nuclear substance in that bottle.
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Woman's hilarious 'flaps on fire' rant goes viral after using Original Source mint shower gel
Um, Original Source… can we talk?
I’d like to take you back to around 6.45am this morning, when I stepped into my bath, and found that my usual, rather innocuous bottle of shower gel (Waitrose essentials, Rose) had run out. A tad irritating, but fortuitously, I had a solution close to hand. A brand new, unopened bottle of your very own Mint and Tea Tree Shower Gel. My bodily cleanliness was assured once more. I breathed a sigh of relief.
I took the Mint and Tea Tree Shower Gel and began to work it into a lather. I applied it to first one leg, then the other, and shaved them diligently. (Yes, feel free to be impressed at my commitment to body defoliation at 6.45am on a Wednesday morning. I was too.) So far, so good.
I washed my arms and shaved underneath them. I washed my neck, breasts, stomach and back. Thus far, it had been a positively first class bathing experience.
And then.
AND THEN.
Oh. Dear. God.
MY VAGINA WAS ABLAZE.
For a moment, I wasn’t entirely sure what had happened. Had I repeated the never to be forgotten error when I managed to apply hair removal cream which was strictly not for front bottoms to my front bottom? Had a stray spark inadvertently set light to my pubic thatch?
BECAUSE IT f***ing FELT LIKE IT.
Yes, Original Source, your innocuous looking green bottle of so called shower gel, it turns out, is an absolute f***ing liability. MY FLAPS WERE ON f***ing FIRE. I had a quick look at the ingredients list to see if it contained gasoline. It did not. There was a warning though. ‘KEEP AWAY FROM EYES.’ Keep away from eyes? KEEP AWAY FROM EYES? Frankly, my eyes were the least of my problems right now.
I frantically scrubbed my flaps, which by now felt as though they were being ceremoniously scrubbed by ants wearing ice skates laced with chilli sauce. ‘7,929 tingling leaves’ claimed the front of the bottle. Tingling? TINGLING? This wasn’t tingling my minge. It was starting a f***ing bush fire down there. (Pun entirely intended. You can thank me later.)
Some twelve hours later, my front bottom has finally calmed down, though may well be suffering from as yet unconfirmed PTSD. My eyes have eventually stopped watering. And so, in the interests of public safety, I thought I would pen you this missive.
be like sticking yer tongue on a battery thoughOn the bright side, would have smelt nice.
Twinge reading thatWoman's hilarious 'flaps on fire' rant goes viral after using Original Source mint shower gel
Um, Original Source… can we talk?
I’d like to take you back to around 6.45am this morning, when I stepped into my bath, and found that my usual, rather innocuous bottle of shower gel (Waitrose essentials, Rose) had run out. A tad irritating, but fortuitously, I had a solution close to hand. A brand new, unopened bottle of your very own Mint and Tea Tree Shower Gel. My bodily cleanliness was assured once more. I breathed a sigh of relief.
I took the Mint and Tea Tree Shower Gel and began to work it into a lather. I applied it to first one leg, then the other, and shaved them diligently. (Yes, feel free to be impressed at my commitment to body defoliation at 6.45am on a Wednesday morning. I was too.) So far, so good.
I washed my arms and shaved underneath them. I washed my neck, breasts, stomach and back. Thus far, it had been a positively first class bathing experience.
And then.
AND THEN.
Oh. Dear. God.
MY VAGINA WAS ABLAZE.
For a moment, I wasn’t entirely sure what had happened. Had I repeated the never to be forgotten error when I managed to apply hair removal cream which was strictly not for front bottoms to my front bottom? Had a stray spark inadvertently set light to my pubic thatch?
BECAUSE IT f***ing FELT LIKE IT.
Yes, Original Source, your innocuous looking green bottle of so called shower gel, it turns out, is an absolute f***ing liability. MY FLAPS WERE ON f***ing FIRE. I had a quick look at the ingredients list to see if it contained gasoline. It did not. There was a warning though. ‘KEEP AWAY FROM EYES.’ Keep away from eyes? KEEP AWAY FROM EYES? Frankly, my eyes were the least of my problems right now.
I frantically scrubbed my flaps, which by now felt as though they were being ceremoniously scrubbed by ants wearing ice skates laced with chilli sauce. ‘7,929 tingling leaves’ claimed the front of the bottle. Tingling? TINGLING? This wasn’t tingling my minge. It was starting a f***ing bush fire down there. (Pun entirely intended. You can thank me later.)
Some twelve hours later, my front bottom has finally calmed down, though may well be suffering from as yet unconfirmed PTSD. My eyes have eventually stopped watering. And so, in the interests of public safety, I thought I would pen you this missive.
I knew a lass from Houghton who was like that... and there was no mint involved. I only did it the once and she was binned off. Think she was self lubricating with Alien blood.be like sticking yer tongue on a battery though
I knew a lass from Houghton who was like that... and there was no mint involved. I only did it the once and she was binned off. Think she was self lubricating with Alien blood.
Try some deep heat on them to warm them back up.
Ouch ya fucker I cannot even laugh because I can imagine that is excruciating pain right thereMany years ago I once picked up a tube of the stuff from the kitchen drawer, thinking it was suncream, spread the fker all over my face and chest, hoping it would cool down my sever sunburn. Ended up sitting in a bath of ice cold water for hours trying to get shot of the pain.
Woman's hilarious 'flaps on fire' rant goes viral after using Original Source mint shower gel
Um, Original Source… can we talk?
I’d like to take you back to around 6.45am this morning, when I stepped into my bath, and found that my usual, rather innocuous bottle of shower gel (Waitrose essentials, Rose) had run out. A tad irritating, but fortuitously, I had a solution close to hand. A brand new, unopened bottle of your very own Mint and Tea Tree Shower Gel. My bodily cleanliness was assured once more. I breathed a sigh of relief.
I took the Mint and Tea Tree Shower Gel and began to work it into a lather. I applied it to first one leg, then the other, and shaved them diligently. (Yes, feel free to be impressed at my commitment to body defoliation at 6.45am on a Wednesday morning. I was too.) So far, so good.
I washed my arms and shaved underneath them. I washed my neck, breasts, stomach and back. Thus far, it had been a positively first class bathing experience.
And then.
AND THEN.
Oh. Dear. God.
MY VAGINA WAS ABLAZE.
For a moment, I wasn’t entirely sure what had happened. Had I repeated the never to be forgotten error when I managed to apply hair removal cream which was strictly not for front bottoms to my front bottom? Had a stray spark inadvertently set light to my pubic thatch?
BECAUSE IT f***ing FELT LIKE IT.
Yes, Original Source, your innocuous looking green bottle of so called shower gel, it turns out, is an absolute f***ing liability. MY FLAPS WERE ON f***ing FIRE. I had a quick look at the ingredients list to see if it contained gasoline. It did not. There was a warning though. ‘KEEP AWAY FROM EYES.’ Keep away from eyes? KEEP AWAY FROM EYES? Frankly, my eyes were the least of my problems right now.
I frantically scrubbed my flaps, which by now felt as though they were being ceremoniously scrubbed by ants wearing ice skates laced with chilli sauce. ‘7,929 tingling leaves’ claimed the front of the bottle. Tingling? TINGLING? This wasn’t tingling my minge. It was starting a f***ing bush fire down there. (Pun entirely intended. You can thank me later.)
Some twelve hours later, my front bottom has finally calmed down, though may well be suffering from as yet unconfirmed PTSD. My eyes have eventually stopped watering. And so, in the interests of public safety, I thought I would pen you this missive.
That’s an even better sensation on the nether regions than the shower gel, class stuff.I use minty tea tree shampoo. Used to feel great on me napper but I must have become immune to it as the effect has worn off.