Depression

[JAZZMANB]

same shit happened to me. Instead of coming clean she cheated on me for months 200 yards from my front door. Acted normal went on holiday then came back she started going to see a long lost friend of hers. I knew what she was up to but had no proof. I worked nights so she could get away with anything. We split up and 5 months on she still Denies everything but I've been drip fed bits of info to put the puzzle together myself. Because i moved to London I've had to stay in a hotel for work and spent so much time on my own since it happened its drove me insane. The weekend before the split she took £300 out my bank and fucked off with him for the weekend. I know we're he lives and really feel like going to get him and carving him up but I know it's instant jail.

5 months on its all I think about. If she had the decency to admit it I could move on but she's a shithouse. I never touched coke while I was with her but did when I was younger. Last weekend I sat in a hotel room sniffed a grands worth of beak over 3 days while drinking 3 bottles of vodka pretty much straight. My heads gone I can't be arsed with anything. . I was meant to go to bern in the Europa league last week but fucked it off despite paying for the whole trip.
I don't even want to go the match tonight. I had a panic attack yesterday in a f***ing shop and I'm now on anti depressants because of all this. I have all my mates and family on block on my phone because I just can't be arsed with anyone.

Getting out of bed is a result these days for me.

Apologies for waffling lol

Bad crack that mate,its that quandary of losing someone but really they weren't that person and you can't reverse it,from a selfish point of view you need to keep yourself right and take the higher ground.Its a blip dont let it become more.Its all you have and even when all the shit comes out its news for 5 minutes then its all "likes " on Facebook like nowt happened.
Mine would have been easier with a few conversations and a lot of truth instead i got lies and deceit and like you i found out the hard way proving to be cleverer than the both of them.Unlike the earlier Facebook blabber i've said very little though i could drag her name through the mud and that makes me feel good when i se her because she know what i know

It's the up and down I can't stand. I got up this morning dreading a call for work as I had to meet another rep in store and work with him for three hours and I was dead nervous about going. When I got there, he was a lovely bloke and we got on really well. Had a right good natter doing the work. He's got my number and is going to ring me if any other work comes up. Felt all happy when I left store.

Then a friend texted me and told me some home truths about a situation that is troubling me and now I'm sitting at home all by myself crying into a cup of coffee

Takes a while,on top of that every bloody song in the world seems to be about break ups and lost love!!You don't notice when you're happy

 

[efcarentwe]

Bad crack that mate,its that quandary of losing someone but really they weren't that person and you can't reverse it,from a selfish point of view you need to keep yourself right and take the higher ground.Its a blip dont let it become more.Its all you have and even when all the shit comes out its news for 5 minutes then its all "likes " on Facebook like nowt happened.
Mine would have been easier with a few conversations and a lot of truth instead i got lies and deceit and like you i found out the hard way proving to be cleverer than the both of them.Unlike the earlier Facebook blabber i've said very little though i could drag her name through the mud and that makes me feel good when i se her because she know what i know

What fucks me off is there was no warning. I gave her a decent life she had fuck all as her mum died when we first got together and she hasn't got much family other than her sister. Everything in her flat was bought and paid for by me. She didn't work. Now at 32 I'm forced to move back into my mothers and commute to London for work and I'm not on great pay. I gave up a house and a job offer to work for jaguar in Liverpool which is good pay to move to be with her.

I helped her through her own depression and the thanks for that is her putting me in the darkest place I've known. Splitting up is not the end of the world it's the devious snide way it happened when all I've ever done is help and support her. I never thought at my age and had to live at home again it's f***ing hard to think I've got to rebuild my life from scratch.

 

[heskey to success]

same shit happened to me. Instead of coming clean she cheated on me for months 200 yards from my front door. Acted normal went on holiday then came back she started going to see a long lost friend of hers. I knew what she was up to but had no proof. I worked nights so she could get away with anything. We split up and 5 months on she still Denies everything but I've been drip fed bits of info to put the puzzle together myself. Because i moved to London I've had to stay in a hotel for work and spent so much time on my own since it happened its drove me insane. The weekend before the split she took £300 out my bank and fucked off with him for the weekend. I know we're he lives and really feel like going to get him and carving him up but I know it's instant jail.

5 months on its all I think about. If she had the decency to admit it I could move on but she's a shithouse. I never touched coke while I was with her but did when I was younger. Last weekend I sat in a hotel room sniffed a grands worth of beak over 3 days while drinking 3 bottles of vodka pretty much straight. My heads gone I can't be arsed with anything. . I was meant to go to bern in the Europa league last week but fucked it off despite paying for the whole trip.
I don't even want to go the match tonight. I had a panic attack yesterday in a f***ing shop and I'm now on anti depressants because of all this. I have all my mates and family on block on my phone because I just can't be arsed with anyone.

Getting out of bed is a result these days for me.

Apologies for waffling lol

That's shit that mate, very similar boat to me as you said. You just have to realise that you so much better off without people like that in your life. Luckily I know I can do better etc but I am just bewildered how somebody I had given the world to can then pass my number on to a new bf to warn me off etc. They are so scared to hear the truth as they know they cant be happy in their bubble because of guilt. I will see her again in year or two and see how she has threw her life away.

As I said luckily I have an inner confidence what kicks in and I feel tremendous, the friends I have available and lasses wanting me is superb. I am also going to the gym on a morning and going for a run on a night, energy put into good use and I am getting better and better all the time. But you seem to be going down the vodka route etc which just makes things worse mate. I don't know what to advise but try and unblock friends or even send me a long message of your frustrations etc. It will pass and you have already won without know it mate.

What fucks me off is there was no warning. I gave her a decent life she had fuck all as her mum died when we first got together and she hasn't got much family other than her sister. Everything in her flat was bought and paid for by me. She didn't work. Now at 32 I'm forced to move back into my mothers and commute to London for work and I'm not on great pay. I gave up a house and a job offer to work for jaguar in Liverpool which is good pay to move to be with her.

I helped her through her own depression and the thanks for that is her putting me in the darkest place I've known. Splitting up is not the end of the world it's the devious snide way it happened when all I've ever done is help and support her. I never thought at my age and had to live at home again it's f***ing hard to think I've got to rebuild my life from scratch.

Apart from the job offer and me being in darkest play that's same as me too. Helping a lass through depression etc and for them to throw it away is even further evidence your better off mate. Feels shit and a cliché but in 2 years you will laugh at how bad of a human being she was. Get yourself to the gym, make some gains and buck a stunner.

 

[JAZZMANB]

What fucks me off is there was no warning. I gave her a decent life she had fuck all as her mum died when we first got together and she hasn't got much family other than her sister. Everything in her flat was bought and paid for by me. She didn't work. Now at 32 I'm forced to move back into my mothers and commute to London for work and I'm not on great pay. I gave up a house and a job offer to work for jaguar in Liverpool which is good pay to move to be with her.

I helped her through her own depression and the thanks for that is her putting me in the darkest place I've known. Splitting up is not the end of the world it's the devious snide way it happened when all I've ever done is help and support her. I never thought at my age and had to live at home again it's f***ing hard to think I've got to rebuild my life from scratch.

You sound like me,we had been out for tea as a family,watched some box sets then she turned the tv off and told me,happy families to zilch and as i was puking my tea up in the bathroom she texted her "friend"You can't make sense of it and even a heartless idiot will have their day of reckoning because they have to carry it,i know my mrs well enough to know what she has done will haunt her forever and she has no one else to blame.Thats why its important to keep your end up and you can walk tall

That's shit that mate, very similar boat to me as you said. You just have to realise that you so much better off without people like that in your life. Luckily I know I can do better etc but I am just bewildered how somebody I had given the world to can then pass my number on to a new bf to warn me off etc. They are so scared to hear the truth as they know they cant be happy in their bubble because of guilt. I will see her again in year or two and see how she has threw her life away.

As I said luckily I have an inner confidence what kicks in and I feel tremendous, the friends I have available and lasses wanting me is superb. I am also going to the gym on a morning and going for a run on a night, energy put into good use and I am getting better and better all the time. But you seem to be going down the vodka route etc which just makes things worse mate. I don't know what to advise but try and unblock friends or even send me a long message of your frustrations etc. It will pass and you have already won without know it mate.


Apart from the job offer and me being in darkest play that's same as me too. Helping a lass through depression etc and for them to throw it away is even further evidence your better off mate. Feels shit and a cliché but in 2 years you will laugh at how bad of a human being she was. Get yourself to the gym, make some gains and buck a stunner.

Mrs had depression all her life but nothing i said or done would make her see it played a part,she was under the influence of her "friend" by this point

 

[efcarentwe]

That's shit that mate, very similar boat to me as you said. You just have to realise that you so much better off without people like that in your life. Luckily I know I can do better etc but I am just bewildered how somebody I had given the world to can then pass my number on to a new bf to warn me off etc. They are so scared to hear the truth as they know they cant be happy in their bubble because of guilt. I will see her again in year or two and see how she has threw her life away.

As I said luckily I have an inner confidence what kicks in and I feel tremendous, the friends I have available and lasses wanting me is superb. I am also going to the gym on a morning and going for a run on a night, energy put into good use and I am getting better and better all the time. But you seem to be going down the vodka route etc which just makes things worse mate. I don't know what to advise but try and unblock friends or even send me a long message of your frustrations etc. It will pass and you have already won without know it mate.


Apart from the job offer and me being in darkest play that's same as me too. Helping a lass through depression etc and for them to throw it away is even further evidence your better off mate. Feels shit and a cliché but in 2 years you will laugh at how bad of a human being she was. Get yourself to the gym, make some gains and buck a stunner.

The vodka and other shit will stop. In fact I've not touched it since. I've joined a gym this month but only went for the second time yesterday and it relaxed me. Her sister has told me the fella is a waster and he's making her borrow money for fags and beer he doesn't work. She's even got into the payday loan malarkey after me getting her debts sorted through step change for her. But if she's happy living that life that's upto Her I suppose. She never had a worry when she was with me. I do think one day she will realise what she's done to me . Her sister has said would I take her back if she can make her see sense. A month ago I probably would of because being the twat I am deep down I still love her and miss her to bits but I'm slowly now coming round to hating her. I'd never be a mug a go back now though. I just hope she suffers soon herself.

You sound like me,we had been out for tea as a family,watched some box sets then she turned the tv off and told me,happy families to zilch and as i was puking my tea up in the bathroom she texted her "friend"You can't make sense of it and even a heartless idiot will have their day of reckoning because they have to carry it,i know my mrs well enough to know what she has done will haunt her forever and she has no one else to blame.Thats why its important to keep your end up and you can walk tall


Mrs had depression all her life but nothing i said or done would make her see it played a part,she was under the influence of her "friend" by this point

 

[luvulongtime]

these last few posts read like a Kenny Rogers song, women cheating on their hard working husbands leading to drink and drug abuse and the eventual loss of the farm due to debt

 

[efcarentwe]

these last few posts read like a Kenny Rogers song, women cheating on their hard working husbands leading to drink and drug abuse and the eventual loss of the farm due to debt

Fucker

You sound like me,we had been out for tea as a family,watched some box sets then she turned the tv off and told me,happy families to zilch and as i was puking my tea up in the bathroom she texted her "friend"You can't make sense of it and even a heartless idiot will have their day of reckoning because they have to carry it,i know my mrs well enough to know what she has done will haunt her forever and she has no one else to blame.Thats why its important to keep your end up and you can walk tall


Mrs had depression all her life but nothing i said or done would make her see it played a part,she was under the influence of her "friend" by this point

The guilt will hit her one day. The thing with her though she never admits she's wrong .

 

[JAZZMANB]

Fucker


The guilt will hit her one day. The thing with her though she never admits she's wrong .

Aye getting back to the opener i'm glad i was in a good place mentally to handle it because stuff like this takes all you have

 

[efcarentwe]

Aye getting back to the opener i'm glad i was in a good place mentally to handle it because stuff like this takes all you have

It certainly does. My lack of motivation has been frightening. I'm not usually like that either.

 

[Boris Bear]

Been struggling with it for a couple of weeks, but it properly hit me this afternoon. I just went to the bathroom and locked myself in for a couple of hours. Bad crack.

And to make things worse, my lass broke up with me tonight. Completely out of the blue.

I've been having lots of thoughts about suicide the last couple of days ( I stress about suicide, not committing suicide), but I scared myself a bit tonight when I started to think about it while she was on the phone splitting up with me.

I find that posting pics on here really helps

 

[becs]

It certainly does. My lack of motivation has been frightening. I'm not usually like that either.

My bairns and work keep me going. If I don't work, I can't provide for my bairns and I'd never do anything to harm them.

 

[heskey to success]

You sound like me,we had been out for tea as a family,watched some box sets then she turned the tv off and told me,happy families to zilch and as i was puking my tea up in the bathroom she texted her "friend"You can't make sense of it and even a heartless idiot will have their day of reckoning because they have to carry it,i know my mrs well enough to know what she has done will haunt her forever and she has no one else to blame.Thats why its important to keep your end up and you can walk tall


Mrs had depression all her life but nothing i said or done would make her see it played a part,she was under the influence of her "friend" by this point

Same thing for me which is another reason to smile and enjoy the fact I got out. She will have drama for the rest of her life.

The vodka and other shit will stop. In fact I've not touched it since. I've joined a gym this month but only went for the second time yesterday and it relaxed me. Her sister has told me the fella is a waster and he's making her borrow money for fags and beer he doesn't work. She's even got into the payday loan malarkey after me getting her debts sorted through step change for her. But if she's happy living that life that's upto Her I suppose. She never had a worry when she was with me. I do think one day she will realise what she's done to me . Her sister has said would I take her back if she can make her see sense. A month ago I probably would of because being the twat I am deep down I still love her and miss her to bits but I'm slowly now coming round to hating her. I'd never be a mug a go back now though. I just hope she suffers soon herself.

Glad your going to gym as best place when this happens.

I am likening my lack of concentration to what I would describe as similar to a permanent hangover. When you wake up with a hangover, for the next day or two you keep getting flashbacks of the night you went out, and may think ''oh shit on Saturday I did this or said that etc''. Well I am constantly getting flashbacks of our relationship of when this was said etc and just picking apart how bad things have ended up. Do you get that too?

At the end of the day I am so much better off and glad this has happened then waste another 2 years or more of my life on someone like that, but still have bit anger at no closure. It will pass though when I buck this new lass on the horizon, makeup girl at boots in the metro

The guilt will hit her one day. The thing with her though she never admits she's wrong .

That's why she has blocked my number and put as much distance as she can between us because I could make her see how wrong she has been, and she could never allow that. Luckily her life will fall apart again and she will realise one day, might be a month, might be 5 years but it will happen

 

[efcarentwe]

Same thing for me which is another reason to smile and enjoy the fact I got out. She will have drama for the rest of her life.

Glad your going to gym as best place when this happens.

I am likening my lack of concentration to what I would describe as similar to a permanent hangover. When you wake up with a hangover, for the next day or two you keep getting flashbacks of the night you went out, and may think ''oh shit on Saturday I did this or said that etc''. Well I am constantly getting flashbacks of our relationship of when this was said etc and just picking apart how bad things have ended up. Do you get that too?

At the end of the day I am so much better off and glad this has happened then waste another 2 years or more of my life on someone like that, but still have bit anger at no closure. It will pass though when I buck this new lass on the horizon, makeup girl at boots in the metro


That's why she has blocked my number and put as much distance as she can between us because I could make her see how wrong she has been, and she could never allow that. Luckily her life will fall apart again and she will realise one day, might be a month, might be 5 years but it will happen

i always get flashbacks . Constantly going back to the last few months we were together analysing everything. I look back to Florida and realise now she was acting strange a bit there. I'll sit there watching the tv then my brain will just switch off and start thinking about her . I have no concentration span at all at the minute it annoys the fuck out of me. I went the Derby the other week and took no notice of the game just sat there staring into space thinking things over in my head. I didn't miss much like the game was shite anyway

That's why she has blocked my number and put as much distance as she can between us because I could make her see how wrong she has been, and she could never allow that. Luckily her life will fall apart again and she will realise one day, might be a month, might be 5 years but it will happen

cowards mate. Reality always bites in the end.

 

[heskey to success]

i always get flashbacks . Constantly going back to the last few months we were together analysing everything. I look back to Florida and realise now she was acting strange a bit there. I'll sit there watching the tv then my brain will just switch off and start thinking about her . I have no concentration span at all at the minute it annoys the fuck out of me. I went the Derby the other week and took no notice of the game just sat there staring into space thinking things over in my head. I didn't miss much like the game was shite anyway

cowards mate. Reality always bites in the end.

I am having the same like. Just can comprehend how people can be like that to people who would have give them their last of everything. If I could have had 10 minutes chat with her and tell her all of the lies shes told etc then I wouldn't have this anger but no closure is a nightmare. It will pass for sure.

I have took apart my holiday in a similar manner to yours and realised how she was also a bit ''off''.

 

[Boris Bear]

Hope your ok fella, message me anytime if your getting any bad feelings, helps to talk. You may have seen my meltdown status on facebook recently

Im currently suffering from a lot of anger at present more than depression. I literally cant say much via social media (legally). I found out during a break up about a month ago that things weren't as amicable as I thought and that the other person went back to an ex boyfriend whilst ending things. Sounds a bad enough situation in itself but there are so many underlying reasons behind this that makes it unfathomable she would do this.
When I found out about what happened I had loads of anger, I was told by her and I told her same thing that if we ended badly we would give opportunity to speak to each other for closure. Well when I confronted her, I got a text saying ''its none of my business and she is blocking my telephone number''. She could never speak to me again because I could give her blatant examples of how she has lied etc etc. If she picked up the phone and listened to me rant for 5 minutes that would have been it. However, with her distancing herself, I had all this anger and nowhere to go. So I posted something on facebook couple of weeks ago telling people what she had done. Got a fantastic response and woke up next morning feeling fine, so happy that I am out of what would have been a horrible existence.

The thing I am struggling with is I cant now concentrate, I try to watch tv but remember things said months ago which didn't add up, remember last time we seen each other she said I want to be with nobody for a long time yet was seeing him again at that time, so many things going through my mind that cant concentrate.

This has gave me nice bit comfort typing this tbf

Women are like monkeys.....they don't let go of one branch until they've got hold of another

 

[efcarentwe]

I am having the same like. Just can comprehend how people can be like that to people who would have give them their last of everything. If I could have had 10 minutes chat with her and tell her all of the lies shes told etc then I wouldn't have this anger but no closure is a nightmare. It will pass for sure.

I have took apart my holiday in a similar manner to yours and realised how she was also a bit ''off''.

I've had a few 'chats' with her since and the soft twat just blatant said each time that she's not with anybody despite her own family telling me she is. I know pretty much everything bar the scrawny c.unts name. I've seen a pic of them together the lot. She even said I might take you back in the future, clearly trying to keep her options open lol.


I'd love to bump into them in the street but I know if I did I'd end up doing time for smashing him to bits which I know makes me sound like a bit of a tit. I've tried goading her so he will come and face me but I think she knows what'll happen if he does .

 

[heskey to success]

I've had a few 'chats' with her since and the soft twat just blatant said each time that she's not with anybody despite her own family telling me she is. I know pretty much everything bar the scrawny c.unts name. I've seen a pic of them together the lot. She even said I might take you back in the future, clearly trying to keep her options open lol.


I'd love to bump into them in the street but I know if I did I'd end up doing time for smashing him to bits which I know makes me sound like a bit of a tit. I've tried goading her so he will come and face me but I think she knows what'll happen if he does .

Totally natural to feel that way but they are obviously scum and not worth it mate. You have won and in time you will comprehensively see that.

 

[efcarentwe]

Totally natural to feel that way but they are obviously scum and not worth it mate. You have won and in time you will comprehensively see that.

Fuck them. Have a good day mate.

 

[the walrus]

Hope your ok fella, message me anytime if your getting any bad feelings, helps to talk. You may have seen my meltdown status on facebook recently

Im currently suffering from a lot of anger at present more than depression. I literally cant say much via social media (legally). I found out during a break up about a month ago that things weren't as amicable as I thought and that the other person went back to an ex boyfriend whilst ending things. Sounds a bad enough situation in itself but there are so many underlying reasons behind this that makes it unfathomable she would do this.
When I found out about what happened I had loads of anger, I was told by her and I told her same thing that if we ended badly we would give opportunity to speak to each other for closure. Well when I confronted her, I got a text saying ''its none of my business and she is blocking my telephone number''. She could never speak to me again because I could give her blatant examples of how she has lied etc etc. If she picked up the phone and listened to me rant for 5 minutes that would have been it. However, with her distancing herself, I had all this anger and nowhere to go. So I posted something on facebook couple of weeks ago telling people what she had done. Got a fantastic response and woke up next morning feeling fine, so happy that I am out of what would have been a horrible existence.

The thing I am struggling with is I cant now concentrate, I try to watch tv but remember things said months ago which didn't add up, remember last time we seen each other she said I want to be with nobody for a long time yet was seeing him again at that time, so many things going through my mind that cant concentrate.

This has gave me nice bit comfort typing this tbf

In my experience, social media makes things 100 times worse when personal things like that are going on. You read Into things way too much

 

[yorkyexile]

It's the up and down I can't stand. I got up this morning dreading a call for work as I had to meet another rep in store and work with him for three hours and I was dead nervous about going. When I got there, he was a lovely bloke and we got on really well. Had a right good natter doing the work. He's got my number and is going to ring me if any other work comes up. Felt all happy when I left store.

Then a friend texted me and told me some home truths about a situation that is troubling me and now I'm sitting at home all by myself crying into a cup of coffee

Mebbes not such a bad thing Becs. Have a good bubble then start looking upwards and onwards again. Worked for me the other day after i had posted.Actuallyslept through that night as well