Workplace stereotypes

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When I first worked in an office in 1991 there were genuine characters.

Office tart - Janet from payroll. I was a naive 19 year old she was a randy late 30s/early 40s sex wildebeeste but I totally missed the opportunity.

Office bore/nerd/virgin - believe it or not it wasn't me. I think his name was Paul and he was in his 30s but was a totally socially inept tw@t.

Office porn distributor(s) - it was a mini sideline industry. A project manager would exchange envelopes with visiting staff from our clients and after a few months the PM told me that they were porn VHS tapes. On a Friday afternoon the factory closed early so the site office staff would sometimes watch them on the security video player and take some home for the weekend.

The lad on the X-ray testing lab would bring in box loads of playboy magazines for us to borrow.

Office drunk - take yer pick we would saunter up to the local pub most dinner times, including managers, so we could stay as long as they did.

Office chain smoker - I shared a small office (no open plan then) with a QA manager and he basically smoked a pipe all day with the window usually shut. After a few months I covertly asked HR if a non smoking policy could be introduced and I still feel guilty that I didn't ask the bloke directly. He wasn't fussed though as he spent about 3 hours a day smoking his pipe outside.
 
When I first worked in an office in 1991 there were genuine characters.

Office tart - Janet from payroll. I was a naive 19 year old she was a randy late 30s/early 40s sex wildebeeste but I totally missed the opportunity.

Office bore/nerd/virgin - believe it or not it wasn't me. I think his name was Paul and he was in his 30s but was a totally socially inept tw@t.

Office porn distributor(s) - it was a mini sideline industry. A project manager would exchange envelopes with visiting staff from our clients and after a few months the PM told me that they were porn VHS tapes. On a Friday afternoon the factory closed early so the site office staff would sometimes watch them on the security video player and take some home for the weekend.

The lad on the X-ray testing lab would bring in box loads of playboy magazines for us to borrow.

Office drunk - take yer pick we would saunter up to the local pub most dinner times, including managers, so we could stay as long as they did.

Office chain smoker - I shared a small office (no open plan then) with a QA manager and he basically smoked a pipe all day with the window usually shut. After a few months I covertly asked HR if a non smoking policy could be introduced and I still feel guilty that I didn't ask the bloke directly. He wasn't fussed though as he spent about 3 hours a day smoking his pipe outside.

One of my first jobs I got stuck in an off on me tod with just a PC (which I couldn't use), a phone and a copy of the Sunday Sport. After reading the Sport (took about 5 minutes max) I dialled one of the sex lines in one of the ads. "Listen to Maria And Her Big Top" or summat it said next to a picture of a busty Maria Whittaker (google if you're ower young)

Anyhow, I rang the number and after about a 5 minute rambling about other sex lines Maria came on and started telling me about her day at the circus ffs!

Spent a while on the Sunderland clubcall number anarl, 25p a minute. Think the number was 0898 121 140 or summat.
 
One of my first jobs I got stuck in an off on me tod with just a PC (which I couldn't use), a phone and a copy of the Sunday Sport. After reading the Sport (took about 5 minutes max) I dialled one of the sex lines in one of the ads. "Listen to Maria And Her Big Top" or summat it said next to a picture of a busty Maria Whittaker (google if you're ower young)

Anyhow, I rang the number and after about a 5 minute rambling about other sex lines Maria came on and started telling me about her day at the circus ffs!

Spent a while on the Sunderland clubcall number anarl, 25p a minute. Think the number was 0898 121 140 or summat.
Were phone numbers itemised on bills in those days? I'm sure I used to phone loads of people from work, a way before people had a mobile phone.

I had my own office after my manager left and I did college homework for about a month until a snide chubby woman with a moustache from another department grassed me up.
 
Several now are giving it the 'anxiety' and stress shite

As a call centre worker I can confirm we have every stereotype you can think of
 
I retired last April but we had a bloke who was a genuine Colin Hunt. The man who considered himself to be the "office joker" - spinning bow ties the lot - always dressed as an elf at Xmas - you know the type.

I saw one lass give him a well earned bunch of fives when he grabbed her bum but despite my encouragement she would not make a formal complaint - which sadly meant that he would only continue to do it to others. The worst of it was that the CEO ( a woman with no sense of humour) thought that the bastard was a riot and good for staff moral. I am looking forward to the day when she has her arse grabbed by the idiot.
so is he :)
 
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