Workplace Ritual Humiliations of Old


Wouldn’t be allowed these days due to health and safety but at my first workplace if it was your birthday you got tied to a wooden cross and pelted with rotten eggs/threw in a skip filled with rotten eggs. Other punishments included bein hung over forth floor balconies by your ankles, shrink wrapped to the town bridge naked in the middle of the night or being stripped, having your balls daubed in ink then iron filings fired all over them. God I miss those days. @Keith S30S or @The soap powder will probably be able to remember others as they worked there too. Any other outlawed workplace practices of old?
The CPS lot like a laugh eh?
 
I was never bullied or picked on at work when i first started tbh.Probs because I was keen as mustard but also I wasn’t a soft touch.

Me and one of the older joiners used to wipe snots on each others hammers etc in unforeseen areas so they would clag to your palm but that was a bit fun.

They don’t know they are born ffs

Aye well I never got any of that treatment either but it went on. Can’t believe people let it happen but it did :)
My first job in a Newcastle factory they tried to make go on a long walk for some ‘Tartan paint’ etc because I was a ‘Mackem’. It’s not like my old man didn’t work down the yards and tell me about all the daft tricks they played on the apprentices. The utter dullards thought it was funny, so I played along and went to the nearest pub for 2 hours, was a belter first week.

Always remember kids; Be useless, get used less!

I did get sent for a ‘Long Stand’ once but went along with it as it meant doing no work for the time I was having my long stand :lol:
 
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Used to have a whoopee cushion we put on our manager's chair in the office, when he sat down it sounded like he did a massive fart, crazy days they were looking back like
Wow.
Thank goodness health and safety have put a stop to all that. It sounds like you were all just out of control man.
 
Wouldn’t be allowed these days due to health and safety but at my first workplace if it was your birthday you got tied to a wooden cross and pelted with rotten eggs/threw in a skip filled with rotten eggs. Other punishments included bein hung over forth floor balconies by your ankles, shrink wrapped to the town bridge naked in the middle of the night or being stripped, having your balls daubed in ink then iron filings fired all over them. God I miss those days. @Keith S30S or @The soap powder will probably be able to remember others as they worked there too. Any other outlawed workplace practices of old?
I remember once at this place the young lad from our shift had been on holiday in the carribean and brought sone very strong rum back so we put him in a cage and lifted him to the roof in a forklift and he wasn’t allowed down until he drank all of the rum ……… he was left there in the dark most of the night while we checked on him now and again. He drank some of the rum vomited everywhere and looked very poorly…….. we panicked let him down and sent him home early…….. thank god he was ok and came back in the next night for his shift !!!
 
Dread to think what it was in the navy years ago.

I've got a fairly tame one from my navy days. Worked on nuclear submarines and we would get new lads by snapping and cutting open a few green cyalume glow sticks (used when walking around the casing at night when surfaced), pouring the contents into a glass and leaving it in some random place (junior rate mess, control room, bunkspace etc).

Someone would say "fucks sake! The back afties have left their primary reactor coolant sample lying around again. Oy, new lad. Take this back to the engine room and tell them not to leave it where it will give us all cancer and/or superpowers"

They would all trot off and carry an uncovered glass of what they thought was a bright green glowing and highly radioactive liquid through the submarine with a terrified look on their faces"

Sorry if anyone was after something more like the lad from the Jean Paul Gaultier aftershave adverts getting bummed half to death. Never saw much of that surprisingly.
 
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