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Working in the ‘stans

Discussion in 'SMB' started by Dave Herbal, Oct 10, 2017.

  1. Dave Herbal

    Dave Herbal Striker

    Khazak, Uzbek etc

    Might have some work there for a few days.
    Having never worked abroad before, being a nervous wreck without a wingman, and with an almost pathological dislike of dealing with strangers, how difficult is this likely to be?

    My lifetime foreign achievement so far has been to fly to Paris and go for a pint on my own.

    If I’m met at the airport, taken to the hotel, picked up for the job, returned to the hotel and taken back to the airport, I may just about cope with it. But if I’m left to arrange any part of it myself, I’m likely to end up wandering around eternally like Marcus Brodie in The Last Crusade.

    Anyone worked there before, and if so, how many times did you get ripped off and/or mugged?
     
    Maxnormal likes this.
  2. Barnacle Boy

    Barnacle Boy Striker

    Keep your wits about you and don't rest on your laurels and you'll be fine mate
     
  3. :lol:
    Captain Shambles on tour. This has so much potential.

    On a serious note, whilst I haven't been to any of the stans, I've travelled all over the world on my own for over twenty years. I'm a bit of a fuckwit at times and I've survived.
    If you're with work, most stuff will be taken care of.
    Football is the global currency. If you ever get into bother, talk football.
    If you really get off the beaten path and end up in a dodgy area on your own, start arguing with yourself really loudly until you are safe. Nobody will approach if they think you are unhinged.
     
  4. Ramshanker

    Ramshanker Winger

    Try Stanley
     
  5. Cowvahlo

    Cowvahlo Striker

    RIP Herbal
     
  6. box2box

    box2box Striker

    Had dealings in Kazakhstan, never realised how Far East it was, very much old Soviet Union influence. People I dealt with in Almaty very professional, English not widely spoken though. The guy at citi bank loved the premiership and new of the black cats......
     
  7. Flared Hicks

    Flared Hicks Striker

    This.

    They can smell fear, like dogs.

    Seriously though, just go with the flow, don't be a dick, don't make it obvious you're a foreigner, try their food and drink, go to bands, sports events etc with the locals and you'll have a great time. I loved my time in Russia.

    Get talking footy with them and they'll love you to bits.
     
    Epping and Stevie Freestein II like this.
  8. Patch

    Patch Winger

    Good shout: biggest team out there is the Kabul Infidels. Make sure you big up the Infidels if you find yourself separated from your mates.
     
  9. Doberman

    Doberman Striker

    on a serious note... just argue with yourself, come across as properly unhinged for the entire time you're lost and you'll be fine.

    not convinced that's serious advice. :lol:
     
    RestlessNatives likes this.
  10. Boz33

    Boz33 Winger

    5/1 international incident reported on the news at ten within hours of landing:lol:
     
  11. Pop

    Pop Striker

    This has a lot of potential
     
  12. Baloo

    Baloo Winger

    Herbal decides to impress the locals with some of his bike and skateboard skills...
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
     
    ProfessionalMackem and T_Bone like this.
  13. Barnacle Boy

    Barnacle Boy Striker

    Prepare by visiting Witherwackistan tomorrow
     
  14. Space Hopper

    Space Hopper Midfield

    Last night I was walking down the street when I saw a mugger trying to grab an old lady’s purse, so I ran over to help.

    We got it off her eventually.
     
  15. Harry Angstrom

    Harry Angstrom Striker

    Haway DH. Just go for it. What's the worst that can happen?
     
    Lambchops likes this.
  16. CraigyLee

    CraigyLee Striker

    :lol::lol:

    Dave is class
     
  17. :lol:
    There is a certain amount of logic to that but I've not tried it myself. Been tempted a couple of times.
    Possibly more sensible advice is to carry a copy of the local paper. I'm sure Herbal will stand out like a sore thumb but it might make him blend in a little.

    They're all mental drivers out that way so at least he has something in common with them.
     
    Stevie Freestein II and Doberman like this.
  18. Just present the friendly jovial demeanour you do on the SMB and they will treat you as one of the brothaz.
     
    Doberman likes this.
  19. Doberman

    Doberman Striker

    :lol: the potential here is just mind-blowing.
     
    RestlessNatives likes this.

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