Discussion in 'SMB' started by janiep, Nov 12, 2017.
Ha'way man at least try to make it believable
A bag of crusty badly aged and squashed cannabis resin under the landing carpet. Dared my mate to smoke it... he didn’t and we chucked it.
Not in the house but the garden. When me and the missus got our house she charged me with removing the rose bushes from the front garden. I dug out about 50 adjustable spanners in the process. I still have no idea why they were there.
When we went to Stuttgart, our bedroom had photos of the owner's Nazi relations and watercolours he'd done of concentration camps on the wall.
2 things, we came back from a family holiday when i was younger, to find a male army print thong on the washing line
And this -
which my brother put together after a voicemail my mam left my dad at work
A butt plug.
We moved into a new build in 2005 and after living there for 6 months or so I went into the garage to find a unicycle. No idea how it got there and it wasn’t there before. I’ve still got it now!
Found the postman having an afternoon nap in bed with our lass.
It was nothing suspicious as she says he was just knackered after his deliveries and asked if he could come in and get warm and have a kip.
not me but a neighbour found a Happy retirement card sent to the previous occupants sent from George Best. When he chnaged his kitchen it was down the back of a cabinet
Stella and Graham the previosu occupants used to be landlords of a pub up in Mayfair for many a year and Bestie was a regualr and a friend. He actually came to the house they retired to a coupel fo occasions.
Not especially odd, but just after moving into our run down home, i lifted the ground floor boards. Previous bloke, i think, had decided not to hire a skip when he'd done work to the house. Everything had been stuffed under the joists. Bricks,curtains,old half used bags of cement,curtain rails,an old yard door,an old ornate lamp shade and all sorts of crap. Space was completely full, no air space either so was riddled with dry rot. Had to rip all downstairs floors out.
Related to OP topic, through the last years i was fitting kitchens, maybe 15 years, on many occasions i've left a piece of paper,timber or plasterboard under some panel or plinth, with "Alan Shearer is a wanker" written on it. I usually signed and dated them.
How do you know?
A hen . Nearly shit myself when it spread it's wings .
A black lad called Eddie.
£400 under the carpet.
We found a memory card hidden on top of the boiler right at the back - was a bit wary about viewing it incase it was child porn or something but looks like photos of a bit of extra marital dalliance - clothed
oh a jackdaw in the loft... shit myself. tried to catch it but couldt.. got so close.. thought fuck it I'lldo it tomorrow... it was hot int he loft as it was summer.. went up next day and it was dead..
felt really bad about it
a rabbit - the fluffy kind with big ears, cat must have brought it in
Nah, he opened them and wrote them a poem.
Separate names with a comma.