Unintentionally Injuring Yourself

Keawyeds

Keawyeds

Striker
I'm hoping that this could yield some pretty ridiculous results judging by the likes of people we have on here.

I'll start the ball rolling...

Having been allowed home from hospital to await liver surgery, I was bored one afternoon and went back to visit my ward at MRI.
I managed to get the drain wire that went into my liver caught around a door handle and ripped it out.
I then had to wait 8 hours in A&E later that night to be readmitted to my ward. Weirdly ripping it out didn't hurt as much as I thought it would. Getting it put back in however...

Utter berk.
 


Apart from self harmers, aren't most injuries unintentional?;)


Previously posted on this thread.
List the scars on your body.
I have matching scars on my shins from two separate comedy falls. One of them also has a dent from when I ran into a crash barrier.:lol:

My big toe has a big scar from where I scooped out the bottom on an old fashioned ring pull.:eek:

The scars on the inside of my stomach are probably my biggest concern despite not being able to see them. I've ended up in hospital twice for blood transfusions due to losing blood through holes in my stomach.
 
RestlessNatives said:
Apart from self harmers, aren't most injuries unintentional?;)


Previously posted on this thread.
List the scars on your body.
I have matching scars on my shins from two separate comedy falls. One of them also has a dent from when I ran into a crash barrier.:lol:

My big toe has a big scar from where I scooped out the bottom on an old fashioned ring pull.:eek:

The scars on the inside of my stomach are probably my biggest concern despite not being able to see them. I've ended up in hospital twice for blood transfusions due to losing blood through holes in my stomach.
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How does that happen?
 
Crashed into someone in a cyclocross race after only about 3 minutes. Wiped us both out. My fault entirely. Tried to jump back onto my bike, only for my knee to give way. Couple of dozen nettle stings and a knackered knee and ankle were dulled pretty quick by the adrenalin. Raced for another 45 minutes, coming off another 2 times. 5 minutes after the race, the pain returned. Nettle stings hurt for a few hours, ankle knacked for a week, but my knee after three and a half weeks, is still very weak, though now usable.
Other stuff ? About 4 years ago i fell off my bike at Hartlepool Marina, and smashed my head off the deck. Smashed my helmet and after lying on the road for about 10 minutes, was still seeing stars. Vertigo at the time and a few episodes since. On the bright side, i've never broken a bone, so consider myself fortunate.
 
RestlessNatives said:
‘One of those things’ was the consultant’s opinion.
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You need a different consultant

BigPete said:
Split your banjo wanking?

:lol::lol::lol:

Bet you made the lass hit the ceiling when got a shag :lol:
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That's what I was thinking but so daren't ask.... how desperate are you to fun that you ripped your own dick. It's like saying I wanted to lift something but wasn't strong enough so I just broke my arm or something
 
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Aituk7 said:
You need a different consultant


That's what I was thinking but so daren't ask.... how desperate are you to fun that you ripped your own dick. It's like saying I wanted to lift something but wasn't strong enough so I just broke my arm or something
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I've done that before but not wanking just younger days.

He must have been having an anger wank. Must have fell our with himself earlier in the day :lol:
 
BigPete said:
I've done that before but not wanking just younger days.

He must have been having an anger wank. Must have fell our with himself earlier in the day :lol:
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I've nearly done it but was lucky. Everytime I've heard it happen it was a lass riding a lad like.... surely when your in control you look after number 1
 
BigPete said:
Aye that's what happened to me went from buzzing to gutted blood all over sheets and to top it off wasn't my bed!
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Orhhh f***ing hell! Hahaha. Mine just felt like if I went a millimetre further it would have went but luckily didn't. I remember that Kevin Smith story about him and his lass when they first met and his knob was rubbing against his Jean zipper while they were getting frisky on the couch. When they went to shag he realised he had a little sore from it but cracked on anyway.... he said it was like dipping his knob in battery acid :lol:
 
MonkeyLove said:
Banjo. Unfortunate timing for a dry hand and recommencement of grip
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Ughhh :( done that when i was 18.
The lass i was bucking thought it odd she'd come on the rag early.
Nearly fookin passed out when i realised it was me banjo :eek:


Not as bad as a lad i worked with, back scuttling his lass on their honeymoon and it came out and with the next thrust he split the shaft :eek::cry: , trip to A+E
 
Opened the door of my car and lept in ,starsky and hutch style,like you do everyday,without thinking about it
Somehow this time i'd opened the back door which we all know is a smaller odd shaped caverty,i bounced off every possible edge and ended up face down on the back seat.It knacked but my first noise was a laugh
 
Most recent was falling out of a bin when jumping into it to squish the cardboard down. Took my feet with it and landed flat on my bum, can still feel the impact months on.
 

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