spider found in a friend of mines toilet today

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Spider, spider
Can I sit down beside yer
And stroke your curly spider legs,
To remind of times
When girls pulled down their knickers for me,
And I pulled down me kegs.
 


Don't kill spiders in your house please, they keep on top of all the proper nasties like mites ticks and fleas that your animals may bring in as well as flys maggots and bed bugs.
For this free service they provide all they ask is a bit of help getting out of the bath when they get stuck and to be left alone to get on with their job.
Fantastic beasts they are love to see them patrolling about the house, proper little warriors are spiders look after them and they will look after you.

Fuck that - scary multi legged bassas. Squash the creepy fuckers.
 
Yeah that would be getting bashed with a hammer whilst I screamed like a girl tbf :eek::confused::lol:.
Cried like Stan laurel.

Don't kill spiders in your house please, they keep on top of all the proper nasties like mites ticks and fleas that your animals may bring in as well as flys maggots and bed bugs.
For this free service they provide all they ask is a bit of help getting out of the bath when they get stuck and to be left alone to get on with their job.
Fantastic beasts they are love to see them patrolling about the house, proper little warriors are spiders look after them and they will look after you.
I see what you say but imagine that git big bastard jut wandering the floors while your watching TV. It'll change the bastard channel!!!
 
Cried like Stan laurel.


I see what you say but imagine that git big bastard jut wandering the floors while your watching TV. It'll change the bastard channel!!!
It's class when you see one darting out from under the settee late at night on a mission, just think of them as your own personal protection squad keeping you safe from the real bitey itchy thingies.

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I love spiders me like, they're class.

I fell out with my mate over spiders (Saying that sentence out loud sounds daft) but he hates them, went round his to watch the Man United v Barca Champions League final years ago (Barca won 2-0), and he saw a spider, took all its legs off, then left it crippled - then he took pleasure in the fact it couldn't move. I put it out its misery and went on like a fanny, saying its not remotely funny and its sadistic and f***ing daft, left his house.

Any, type of insect/pet/creature cruelty sickens me as I love 'em all (except wasps, they're wrong uns - even then I wouldn't bother them).

They cant defend themselves just leave them alone. I'm always saving them me :cool:

Anyway, thats a f***ing big one OP.
 
Why's it got 5 legs on one side and 3 on the other? Please don't say it's a plague of giant asymmetric spiders, that drop from doorframes and run rapid rings around you until you pass out, and then they lay eggs in your ear drums. Please don't say that.
 
Why's it got 5 legs on one side and 3 on the other? Please don't say it's a plague of giant asymmetric spiders, that drop from doorframes and run rapid rings around you until you pass out, and then they lay eggs in your ear drums. Please don't say that.

Billy, it's a plague of giant asymmetric spiders, that drop from doorframes and run rapid rings around you until you pass out, and then they lay eggs in your ear drums.
 
Don't kill spiders in your house please, they keep on top of all the proper nasties like mites ticks and fleas that your animals may bring in as well as flys maggots and bed bugs.
For this free service they provide all they ask is a bit of help getting out of the bath when they get stuck and to be left alone to get on with their job.
Fantastic beasts they are love to see them patrolling about the house, proper little warriors are spiders look after them and they will look after you.
I want to believe this, but they look proper scary man!

That's me never visiting my Mam and dad again

Where the fuck in Gilesgate
I'll have to go a different way to work now ffs.
 
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