People with degrees that are a bit thick really

Discussion in 'SMB' started by Dave Herbal, Apr 15, 2018.

  1. HebburnMackem

    HebburnMackem Striker

  2. ajthemackem

    ajthemackem Striker

    Goat Eyes and Bishop Boy like this.
  3. Scimmy

    Scimmy Striker

    I've done that. Just the once, and for about a minute.

    Americans always seem to refer to the sea as the ocean. Let's go for a swim in the ocean just doesn't sound right to a Brit. Maybe the Yanks do it because their continent on both sides is bounded by seas that are oceans.
    Last edited: Apr 16, 2018
    Tomma likes this.
  4. BigPete

    BigPete Striker

  5. mux

    mux Striker Contributor

    You're bang on there Scim.

    In fact I would be fairly confident that if the North Sea was in fact called the North Custard then we would all be saying we were going for a swim in the custard.
    Scimmy likes this.
  6. Unbalanced Views

    Unbalanced Views Central Defender

    My degree is in maths, my grammar, spelling and punctuation are appalling, I do not care
    shepherd88 likes this.
  7. Sir Lancelot

    Sir Lancelot Winger

    I think that you have missed the point. It was the BBC calling the Atlantic Ocean the Atlantic Sea. It is not, and never has been called the Atlantic Sea. It’s an Ocean.

    Contrary to what the video claims, the Mediterranean is not the largest sea. That honour belongs to the Philippine Sea, a part of the North Pacific Ocean.
  8. dangermows

    dangermows Striker

    Looks like the clever uns are trolling and whooshing.
  9. Frijj

    Frijj Striker Contributor

    The North Sea forms part of the Atlantic Ocean so really you’re swimming in the Atlantic when you go swimming off the coast of Seaton Carew or wherever.

    The more you know :cool:
  10. mini-x2

    mini-x2 Striker

    People who write in a dimwitted fashion with no sense of respect for grammar boil my piss. It’s not rocket science for fuck’s sake.
    Dave Herbal likes this.
  11. king of the road

    king of the road Midfield

    * as thick as mince

    Not from Harvard or Cambridge. Abbott is a woeful politician but you cannot be thick and gain a place at Cambridge.
    Last edited: Apr 16, 2018
  12. yyy

    yyy Striker

    You'd be surprised how allegedly highly qualified some people can be yet not have a clue.

    I've told this story before, however, it's relevant to the above in that there's work out there that should have never been passed.

    Way back whilst I was working for a certain ex-Poly in a place not too far from Sunderland (no, not Lord Rowell's place at the bottom of Chester Road), my colleges and I were expected to informally supervise the projects of M.Sc. students within the Engineering department. Most were from India and had allegedly passed a minimum standard of English to be able to able to study at an English University and start the course.

    Their ideas of thorough, meticulous project work was to spend their project period working full time in the local call centres around Quorum and Cobalt Business Parks. When asked how they expected to fit in their project work, they responded "Don't worry, well manage it."

    Yea, right.

    1) One of my colleagues reported that one student's dissertation had largely been cut and paste from the Internet. It even included a passage where the "author" had sat, enjoying views of Lake Placid in the United States. He'd never been to the United States. At least the cutting and pasting at least ensured the standard of the "American" English.

    2) I attempted to read one of the dissertations submitted. The English was more like a collection of random words rather than coherent sentences. One of my colleagues instructed me not to help him correct it, something I had no intention of doing. We'd been instructed to ensure the students were to "pass" (the inference being international student's money was more important than integrity and results), however, this dissertation was so incomprehensible it had to be failed. This caused an inquest with complaints from the student and his brother, which bore out our decision to fail him. He resat the following year and passed at the second attempt.

    3) I helped also with the assessment of project oral presentations. As it happens, the two students I examined did better with their poster presentations, however, I was told to mark down the presentations to the minimum pass level by a senior lecturer as in his words, it was the "most they deserved'. For once, some honesty from a senior lecturer.

    4) I found myself helping out a Thai colleague (and mate) who'd been given three days to sort out the English in his PhD thesis or be failed - he was approaching his four year limit. Once again, the English at times was at times more a collection of random words rather than coherent English. After a a weekend of proofreading for him, we supplied him with the proofed document and the cleaned-up English. He reacted "You've changed the meaning!!!". He did submit and was passed "with minor corrections". He's now considered a leading specialist back in Thailand in the field of renewable energy and wind turbine design.

    Whilst he was a likeable lad, even our proof-reading was short of a pass without major correction. But then again, he was an international student. I suspect possibly his supervisor rewrote large sections of the thesis for him to ensure he'd pass, something I as a home grown student could not expect.


    On the flip side of the coin, there were two really hard working, diligent Nigerian lads who passed the same M.Sc. with flying colours. We were informally spotting potential future Ph.D. students and recommended the two Nigerians to be considered due to their work ethic. Excellent presentation skills, little to no problems with their English and well capable of conducting original research with minimal supervision. However, both lads wanted to go back home to take up jobs in Nigeria.

    Who went forward to take up Ph.D.s? Two of the Indian students who struggled to pass, including the one we had to fail.


    Did I mention these students were expected to have a minimum standard of English to be allowed to study in an English University?

    He wrote in the first person as well as appalling use of the word "was"? I've always been told never to write a technical report in the first person.

    When a student or recent graduate come on The Chase, you just know they're going to be among the worst performers. That includes even some teachers.

    There is a lot to be said at times in favour of the school of life.

    It's never been considered right to write reports, dissertations, theses or other top level document in the first person.

    I've only ever come across one person at a higher level who asked why I never wrote in the first person.

    You only use the first person in stories and novels.

    I'd let him away with that one. How many times have you accessed this place via your mobile phone and predictive text has stepped in to correct you? How many times have you cocked up with the odd word typing a hurried message on here.

    Fair comment. Our two most common verbs, "to have" and "two be", are highly irregular.

    If a kid asks "Why do we say 'I was' and 'We were' when we can just use one word?", how do you really answer the question?

    Because that is the accepted usage of standard English?


    Because that is the way the English language has developed.


    If the "Why?" question keeps being repeated, there is no ultimate answer even for the more knowledgeable linguists.

    I've been told my repeated use of "actually", "basically" and "to be honest" are annoying. I even got cautioned about the use of "to be honest" after an agency interview, in that my use of it made me seem "dishonest".

    I've jumped between academia and the real world. "Urgent" in academia is sort of in the next three weeks. In the real world, urgent can mean within the half hour. Switching your mindset between the two can take some doing and some people can't manage it.

    On moving back into a University environment, I just wanted to crack on with the work being told I had a sizeable project in front of me and ended up producing twice as much data as I needed to. It actually proved to be a hindrance towards the end as I could not report all the data without confusing what I had to report, though the surplus data ended up being reported in extra papers.

    Switching back the real world again saw me having to adjust back to focusing on the immediate issue, collecting only the data needed to answer a customer or supplier query and no more.
    Last edited: Apr 16, 2018
    Lexingtongue likes this.
  13. Dave Herbal

    Dave Herbal Striker

    You see, this worries me. What you’re saying is that you can read a book or technical document with everything done properly, then completely disregard that and write any old shite you feel. You’re not learning from what you’re reading. Which would raise question marks about your ability to learn and adapt, to me. You might be great at maths but your big maths brain can’t bother iteslf to learn things that would make your written work better?

    This reminds me of my ex. She would write the names of famous people/things and spell them wrong. When I questioned her she said she didn’t know how it was spelled. I pointed out that she must have read the names a million times, so how did she not know the correct spelling? She said she “just read them” but didn’t take an notice of the spelling. I find that utterly bizzare.
    mux and Flared Hicks like this.
  14. duff_man

    duff_man Striker

    Dave, in the table of things that people find bizzare (sic) about other peoples thinking, your name would be very near to the top
  15. One of my favourite pieces of graffiti from Durham:

    "Before I came to Durham I couldn't even spell Engineer. Now I is one!"
    Horatio Pugwash, Frijj and yyy like this.
  16. KeefBeer

    KeefBeer Midfield

    My MBA was a total waste of money on me, fortunately it wasn't mine.
    My boss had funds for 2 out 3 of us and I was 53yo and the money should have been spent on the other bloke.
    18 months after graduation I was made redundant by the boss who had sent me on the Masters.
  17. Tadger

    Tadger Striker

    Now that’s a woman.
    TopCat, Frijj and Bishop Boy like this.
  18. yyy

    yyy Striker

    I'll buy her a drink. Can you put me in touch with her?

    Damn, beat me to it!!!
    TopCat likes this.
  19. Dave Herbal

    Dave Herbal Striker

    That was the joke man :rolleyes:
    Anyway, I thought you’d understand the rules by which I judge people by now:
    1) Eveyone else is wrong
    2) See Point 1
    duff_man likes this.
  20. yyy

    yyy Striker

    If I'm not sure how to spell a word, I admit I use the phonetics of the word to work out it's spelling. I get it right more often than not, but the results can be amusing when i get it wrong. :)

Share This Page