Office/work-based things that haven’t changed



a1970man said:
The old scenario where you have a stunning lass at your work.

After a while you become a little obsessed with this vision of loveliness and stalk all her social media accounts daily.

You get a bit excited every time your meetings coincide or you get put on the same project.

One day you find out that theres a night out with a mutual acquaintance and shes going so you make a casual commitment to attend
if your passing, but knowing full well that you'll be there. New stuff is purchased and a full male grooming schedule is undertaken
prior to the event and even a spare vial of "Sex Panther for Men" is dropped in your pocket, just in case your woman killing scent
gets blown away on the way to the pub.

You arrive, acquire the target and talk to someone close to them so as not to scare them away with a direct assault.
Casually you 'notice' them and strike up a conversation.

You then realise that in this environment, shes bang average, even a little plain. Her only attempt at preparing for the night is to
have chucked on a different top since finishing work,where as you into ASOS for about two ton, you even had new socks on for Christ sake.

You then give up on her and chase women round all weekend.

Come Monday morning, shes sussed that you only turned up on Friday to see her and shes now decided that maybe you might be worth a risk for
the Christmas party, so you spend the next six months hiding in stationery cupboards and behind monitors until she loses interest and moves on.

... as I say just "Office/work-based things that haven’t changed" that you see every day and by no means happened to me.
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Unlucky whoever that was.
 
a1970man said:
The old scenario where you have a stunning lass at your work.

After a while you become a little obsessed with this vision of loveliness and stalk all her social media accounts daily.

You get a bit excited every time your meetings coincide or you get put on the same project.

One day you find out that theres a night out with a mutual acquaintance and shes going so you make a casual commitment to attend
if your passing, but knowing full well that you'll be there. New stuff is purchased and a full male grooming schedule is undertaken
prior to the event and even a spare vial of "Sex Panther for Men" is dropped in your pocket, just in case your woman killing scent
gets blown away on the way to the pub.

You arrive, acquire the target and talk to someone close to them so as not to scare them away with a direct assault.
Casually you 'notice' them and strike up a conversation.

You then realise that in this environment, shes bang average, even a little plain. Her only attempt at preparing for the night is to
have chucked on a different top since finishing work,where as you into ASOS for about two ton, you even had new socks on for Christ sake.

You then give up on her and chase women round all weekend.

Come Monday morning, shes sussed that you only turned up on Friday to see her and shes now decided that maybe you might be worth a risk for
the Christmas party, so you spend the next six months hiding in stationery cupboards and behind monitors until she loses interest and moves on.

... as I say just "Office/work-based things that haven’t changed" that you see every day and by no means happened to me.
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Sounds like a load of people went out for casual work drinks and you're a bit of a weird lad who lives in his own head.
 
Isn’t this all nice getting along and that

Frijj said:
You should be nicer to people. You might need a lift off him one day*


*I’m fully aware that the public transport options in London are the best in the country and it is unlikely you’ll need a lift, but still...
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Yay can fuck off tha
 
Wilfy said:
You utter bastard.
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I said thanks for the invite though that’s very kind. The response was “well we want you to come. You should come”.

I said “you’ve all worked here together as a team for a good few years and i’m only a temp, it would seem a bit disingenuous”.

Turns out it’s not even being expensed.
 
MackneyHackem said:
I said thanks for the invite though that’s very kind. The response was “well we want you to come. You should come”.

I said “you’ve all worked here together as a team for a good few years and i’m only a temp, it would seem a bit disingenuous”.

Turns out it’s not even being expensed.
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Ah, you tight fisted git. :lol:
 
MackneyHackem said:
I said thanks for the invite though that’s very kind. The response was “well we want you to come. You should come”.

I said “you’ve all worked here together as a team for a good few years and i’m only a temp, it would seem a bit disingenuous”.

Turns out it’s not even being expensed.
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Fuck that then.
 
Charmless Man said:
How much do they get?
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Used to be the case that you could take two separate weeks of self-certified sick leave without any comeback at all. 'Bradford factor' didn't exist and nobody batted an eyelid.

Some of the old hands, when questioned about how much leave they had left, would always respond with something like "I've got 5 days leave left plus I haven't used any of my sick allocation yet".

This was to Senior management as well, although to be fair they were operating under the same principles.
 
Somehow people find out it's my birthday. I don't tell them. It must be shared from my records. Then I'm expected to be jolly and all 'birthday-like'. I'm bemused by this because in my family we NEVER did birthdays. I get a card from my Mam and vice versa but none of the rest of the family bother. I wouldn't know my brothers and sisters birthdays without looking it up and they wouldn't know mine. THIS IS NOT A PROBLEM. I'm not unhappy or miserable. It just doesn't entre my radar. If my missus and the inlaws didn't say anything I'd probably forget.

I usually 'pretend' to keep the peace in the office and so people don't get a wrong impression. I pretend that I'm grateful for the attention and thankful for the card/s. And it is nice that they think of me. The concept of it being on a particular day is alien to me though. Today is my birthday. The mask slipped for a second and my facial expression probably communicated that I'd forgotten momentarily that it was my birthday. I think I went down in the that persons estimation. They can't understand why I haven't taken the day off.
 

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