mackembuddha
Central Defender
The swimming pool having to be shut down on a weekly basis because someone had shite in the pool.
Memories of comprehensive school
- Thread starter houst69
- Start date
mini-x2
Striker
Just reminded me of a lad who was deemed too poorly one day to swim in our school’s pool. We were all lined up sitting on the long bench that ran alongside it when the PE teacher shouted of him to come up and get his book signed off. Anyway to cut a long story short someone booted him in the pool fully clothed and I have a great memory of him swimming about trying to retrieve his floating jotters/pens etc.
goldie
Central Defender
Boinger
Winger
Setting a lads hair alight when he pushed in front of me in the dinner queue.
WTF have I just read.
Putting drawing pins under the torn fabric of Frazer's seat then waiting for the ensuing hilarity. One little wince followed by an act of defiance as he lowered himself onto the seat.
Wiping out the population of an entire fish tank with a bottle of Tabac aftershave
Drawing cocks on the french class windows only to say they were cowboy hats when caught.
Making Betty Cheng cry by saying the skeleton in Mr Attley's class was her boyfriend.
WTF have I just read.
Last edited:
And that lad turned out to be John Wile.
Boinger
Winger
He's at least 20 yrs older than me!
John Wile is at least 93?
Boinger
Winger
Chesterladmackem
Midfield
Starting comp and some daft lad burnt most of it down 4 weeks later (pelton roseberry).
gegsongegsonlegs
Midfield
Redhouse??
Just checked wiki.. 14yrs older.
Anyway, prompted by a post earlier from @Swindon On Tour in which he said he was an outsider on this board, I'm going to go way beyond my remit and way beyond my budget and unilaterally decide that you're both honorary Mackems. I think of you similarly as amongst the best people on here... not quite as good as @PhilSAFC or @muggboots but better than @mux, basically...
Jabberwocky
Winger
Asking the teacher of English Mr Moss if you could “lend” something off him in class just to get a few minutes off being taught anything so you could hear his spiel about the difference between borrow and lend.
‘Mr Moss Sucks cocks’ graffitied on his classroom wall. Feel bad about being a little twat in his class as he was a decent and very clever bloke.... never did give me back my copy of 1996 FHM sexiest women though.
Micky Winter chucking you off a radiator was always an experience.
Using half a can of Lynx to hide the smell of lambert and butlers and smoking resin from lungs in the back lane.
Hanging globules of flem from the roof of the tunnel like grim stalactites
Pre Jamie Oliver canteen food which was about 40% Mechanically reclaimed meat
A fight kicking off in the yard and within 15 seconds there was 400 kids in a near riot calling for blood.
Teachers hating @girojim for being a smart arsed little twat
Paddy O'Dors
Striker
Some lad hoying a petrol bomb at another group of lads outside Pennywell shops one dinner time. He hadn't stuffed the rag in tight enough so when he went to toss it the fuel went down his back and set him alight instead. Had to roll him about to put him out.
MONTYMCPHAIL
Striker
The "brothers" at St Aidan's
Manuel
Striker
Pre fab labs for us at Staindrop.
the dark one
Winger
The teacher locked me in the music cupboard when we were playing the recorder, I was that bad. The fucker would be sacked nowadays. We had some rite heed the ball teachers in the 80s. Including a dwarf history teacher who used to jump off a chair whilst giving you the cane.The little bastard.
Rotten Johnny
Central Defender
Bucking Miss Mulrooney after arithmetic.
Mickeys Chicken Leg
Midfield
WTF have I just read.
It was an anatomical skeleton man
She was a queer kid who's family ran the local Chinese take away. She'd understand drunken mackems every weekend, yet whenever she got wrong in class she'd trot out the "Me no understand"
Aye
