Left Handed Handshake

[Kevsgreat]

Stab the offender with your broadsword.

 

[Charmless Man]

I'd rather shake someone's stump than their left hand

Anyway, if we all just reciprocally cupped each other’s balls as a greeting none of this would matter.

 

[Deleted member 23273]

Stab the offender with your broadsword.

Oh Danny Boy.

 

[Surrey Mackem]

I just say what my dad always said whenever he was offered a left hand - "Left hand for tramps" - and give my right hand... No idea where he got that from like

 

[hypersonic]

Just had one of these, how do I right this wrong?

How does this work then?

Feel like i'd end up throwing them over my shoulder.

 

[the boot]

I Used to love a left handed salute to young officers.

 

[Beer_Monkey]

Who's offering left handed handshakes?
My fatha always made sure to tell me that there's three things to remember when shaking a blokes hand.
1) Stand up
2) Look them in the eyes when greeting them.
3) Offer a firm, solid (RIGHT) hand.

Is there anything that's more off-putting when meeting a bloke than if they offer their hand out as if it was a piece of warm, 3 day old lettuce?

 

[Yankee Mackem]

The correct response is to slap it vigorously and then hold your hand up waiting for a high five.

 

[Kevsgreat]

How about turning your back to them and offering your right hand that way, make it a sort of upside down back to front handshake.

 

[tunstall birdman]

I wonder why man did not develop the custom to shake the opposite hand of the wanking hand? Makes sense to me because you never know if someone has just pulled their plud beforehand?

 

[yamar1]

This happened to me a few weeks back and I didn't understand what was going on. I'm sure the same lass had shook my right hand when I arrived. Would be great if she's been going through life under the misapprehension that you shake the right hand on greeting and left on departure.

There you go...

 

[ivanthereasonable]

How about turning your back to them and offering your right hand that way, make it a sort of upside down back to front handshake.

This is getting complicated now.

I have to say, if someone offered me their left hand and an explanation wasn't immediate, i'd ignore it.

 

[Helmerroids]

You’re now part of the Grand Masonic Lodge of Monk De Wally De Honk.

 

[REDM1ST]

I'd rather shake someone's stump than their left hand

How many stumps have you shook out of interest?

 

[Goat Eyes]

How many stumps have you shook out of interest?

One here. Got me every time he did.

Cheers for the input anyway.

I was sat, he was leaving and we weren’t really going to shake hands but he went for it. Was still impressed with my responsiveness and grip.

 

[Deleted member 559]

Just had one of these, how do I right this wrong?

RIP

 

[Ricci's Special Kebabs]

What next, double handed handshake?

 

[Skandhaless]

That is just bad manners, provided , of course, that the right hand is either missing or obviously damaged. If this is the case, I would then extend my left hand to avoid awkward manoeuvres.
I also don’t like if, being introduced to a seated man, they remain seated to shake hands. Again, bad manners. Ladies can remain seated. I am very old school on this, you can only make a first impression once.

Don't so much mind the seated handshake if it's very informal Eg we're both in a pub and a mutual says "skan this is churcy" wouldn't expect you to get up. If it's business or formal always

 

[The Raven]

Happened to me last year at work.

Customer visit and the bloke stuck his left hand out, I put my right hand out.

He sort of nodded to his hand and looked back at me. I just withdrew my hand and sat down.

After the customers had left, my boss said I was disrespectful. I said the bloke was a cock and shouldn't be allowed out amongst decent people.

We agreed to disagree.

 

[Deleted member 14766]

who the fuck shakes with their left? (not including amputees etc)

In my day: Boy Scouts

(“nearest the heart” iirc)