the north east is full of proper blokes and we don’t do none of that fruity shit like cry or talk about feelings. But I learned on my thesis that these “toxic” males are prime candidates for irrational fears and our bodies are so tightly wound they replicate screaming into a pillow by being scared of daft stuff. I appreciate a tig welder might find it tough to open up about fears so I’ll get the ball rolling. I’m terrified of Al Jolson LP covers. Spiders and moths have made me contemplate suicide My ma was a smotherer and convinced me dog muck was a powerful poison and that if I ever pulled bags of dog shit out the dogger bin to throw at people I could contract sepsis. I worry that I might be completely mental but because I don’t know I’m mental I think I’m fine but because I’m mental I’m probably having a shit in the office in front of everyone but I think I’m on the pot at home. Who wants to go next?