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Guilty of a but not bJealous TWAT
Beards are only for ugly people and slapheads to distract your gaze from their cranial/facial misgivings.
Oooooo someone has told old man how to use capitals![]()
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Chasing your dog around with a chilliIn:
Wet t-shirt competitions
Madchester style bowl cuts
Rimini
White jeans
Waxed socks
Paper underpants
The hidden Andalusian quarter of Plains Farm
Sucking on a Fisherman’s Friend
Mystery tours
The Eurodisco revival
Being sick in hotel receptions
Giving the V-sign to random grannies on the bus
Two earrings in your right ear
Timmy Mallet’s Mallet’s Mallet
Yoghurt
Slapping people on the back of the neck
Pub crawls
The 1983 Italian Estate Agent look
Golfing umbrellas
The Rosedene
Yachting jackets
Punching your stomach to show how hard you are
Sou’westers
Coming home with more than you went out with
Out:
Tattoos
Skinny jeans
Beards
Just For Men beard version
Andy Carroll’s beard
Prime
People under six foot
Ashbrooke Cricket Club
Magic tricks at the match
Takeaways
People having energy drinks for breakfast
Highlights in your pubic hair
Microwave kebabs
Washing your own car
Hating your job
Fungus-infested lugs
Cars that talk to you
Multicoloured dreamcoats
VAR tomfoolery
Having hair like Jeremy Clarkson
Slapheads
Chasing your dog around with a chilli pepper
Shouting ‘I’ve got the pox’ in the Post Office
Adidas Spezial
False tan on your ballsack
Out:
London.
Yachting jackets still holding strong![]()
Just the ticket for deflecting sea spray whilst sipping cocktails on the yacht.
Out:
Seaham
In: lasagne sandwiches.
Where exactly is it?The hidden Andalusian quarter of Plains Farm
I've just shook it all about for you lopI'm well out this month FFS. Normally I'm doing a bit of the hokey cokey because that's literally what it's all about.
Can’t do owt about the highlights in me pubes like. Harsh.