I have something to do which I am at a loss to prepare for.

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That's the problem. For some reason over the last few years I have become quite an emotional person. Our lass says I shouldn't go to see him 'cos I'll start crying and that'll knack the job.
Because as emotional as you want but try and laugh at the same time. It will be one of the most uplifting things you will do. (Probably)
 


Take a four pack or more sit and chat have a drink.
If he can't don't worry just be you.
If you feel like blubbing like a baby do so.
Don't worry about your reaction to seeing him like he is You are both in unchartered territory.
The stiffupper lip thing is a farce just be yourself, take some old photos of the pair of you if you have any. Reminisce about the stupid things you got up to.
 
That's the problem. For some reason over the last few years I have become quite an emotional person. Our lass says I shouldn't go to see him 'cos I'll start crying and that'll knack the job.
Remember this is about him not you ................go and see your marra!!!!
 
I often don't see my mates for months/years on end and as soon as we're together it's like were 19 again ripping the piss out of each other and having a laugh. As other have said it'll be fine and if you don't you'll regret it.
 
That's the problem. For some reason over the last few years I have become quite an emotional person. Our lass says I shouldn't go to see him 'cos I'll start crying and that'll knack the job.
just keep nipping out "for a piss", bubble and gan back in. It`s a hard thing to do matey but a good un to do if you get what I mean. Best of luck with it
 
In my early twenties there was a group of us who kicked around together like all twenty-somethings do. We were always together, living in each others' pockets. As we got older we all drifted apart from each other with families being raised etc.

There is one bloke though with whom I shared an almost identical sense of humour and with whom I spent more time and had better "adventures". We haven't been out for a pint together for at least fifteen years despite bumping into each other in Asda a couple of times a year and promising to contact each other for a night in the pub, which of course we never did, as we have years ahead of us to do that. The other lads from our group have all basically turned into people I would no longer want to spend time with as they have got older. But the lad I am talking about is a bloke I have a great regard for.

Yesterday I got a phone call from his wife to tell me he has been given two weeks to live, having been diagnosed with cancer throughout his body. She said her husband would like to see me before he dies and I gladly agreed to go and visit him.

Problem is I do not know what to say to him. His wife says he's ok about his impending fate but that doesn't really help. What do you say to a pal who knows he is about to die, and knows that you know as well??

When it is time to leave him for the last time, how do I say goodbye??

God, I'm filling up typing this.
Horrible situation fella. I am sure the words will come. I don't have many good mates but have two that we really go out of our ways to make sure we have regular meet ups.
 
Try to have a laugh & don't spend your final moments together sad. Easy for me to say, but have a bit of craic about the good times. & tell the fecker that he could have just said so if he didn't want to go for a pint with you. This is going a bit far. ;)
 
Very difficult.
I think if you can keep your 'stuff' under wraps the better for him. It can be very draining for someone who is very ill to be carer for someone who is well and has never had to really face their own mortality. That doesn't mean that you can't express your own emotion but I would say that there is a balance in expressing your grief and burdening him with it. You both know this is maybe the last time. Time for warmth and a bit of craic and a realisation that it will be best for both of you to make this as joyous an occasion as befits. After all you were great mates and he wants to see you before he goes. Oh and ignore the missus.
 
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