How do I stop my son from crying?


I think we are to some extent. When you see what the traits are we all fit in somewhere, just not enough to be noticeable.

I'm autistic and my ex wife apparently isn't. I could sit there and turn the TV remote up to 19 and she'd say ooh put it on 20. I'd say what difference does it make? I'm supposed to be the autistic one :lol:

I have to have it on either an even number, or 5.
I'm sure I'm on the spectrum. I could quite happily put tins on shelves so they all look nice. Maybe I just like order. Possibly both!
 
I have to have it on either an even number, or 5.
I'm sure I'm on the spectrum. I could quite happily put tins on shelves so they all look nice. Maybe I just like order. Possibly both!
That is a trait of autism but you need a cluster of these traits to be noticeable to be considered autistic. To me that is irrational and I would deliberately not put it on the even number. That's why I'm autistic :lol:
I'm not fussy
Well my profile pic is mostly naked so have a look at that :lol:
 
You reckon?

I’s say it’s the opposite. I think these days everyone is encouraged to share/embrace their emotions which isn’t a bad thing in principle. But what I think it’s resulted in is people simply acting out on their emotions because “it’s just how I feel and I can’t help it” because no matter how unreasonable or irrational an emotion may be; they’re told it’s valid because it’s real.

If I’m angry or upset, I ask myself what at and why. And if the logical part of my brain determines if it’s not reasonable or fair for me to be angry, I just crack on until it goes away because it always does.
There's definitely been a swing in that people pander to their kids way too much. Parents have become enablers, and then people wonder why they grow up to be ill-adjusted to society.


This is not a comment on the OP's situation.
 
That is a trait of autism but you need a cluster of these traits to be noticeable to be considered autistic. To me that is irrational and I would deliberately not put it on the even number. That's why I'm autistic :lol:

Well my profile pic is mostly naked so have a look at that :lol:

But 5 is in the middle between 0 and 10! See. Rationalised madness.
I had a thing about the light switches being either all up or all down. I had to get a grip on that
 
I think we are to some extent. When you see what the traits are we all fit in somewhere, just not enough to be noticeable.

I'm autistic and my ex wife apparently isn't. I could sit there and turn the TV remote up to 19 and she'd say ooh put it on 20. I'd say what difference does it make? I'm supposed to be the autistic one :lol:
I've got some OCD traits. Volume on even numbers. The kitchen lights have to turned off a certain way in the kitchen - drives our lass nuts that one. Turn the bathroom light on and off five times before I go to bed or somebody will die. Just normal things like that.




Only kidding about the bathroom.
 
But 5 is in the middle between 0 and 10! See. Rationalised madness.
I had a thing about the light switches being either all up or all down. I had to get a grip on that
I didn't think I had it years ago and I went with my daughter who organised her own diagnosis as an adult. The two doctors in the room were talking about things and I said "I know I'm not autistic because......". They just smirked at each other and I knew :lol:
I've got some OCD traits. Volume on even numbers. The kitchen lights have to turned off a certain way in the kitchen - drives our lass nuts that one. Turn the bathroom light on and off five times before I go to bed or somebody will die. Just normal things like that.




Only kidding about the bathroom.
🤣
I think the biggest difficulty I have being autistic is getting my head around how other people think. I get into bother on here quite a bit and get accused of all sorts of stuff. Apparently I'm racist, homophobic, right wing, sexist and a Russian apologist :lol:. It's quite amusing really because I'm non of these things.

I don't think a neurotypical person can often grasp that someone can pull them up for talking shit but still have a generally similar view. You're either with them or against them and I can't fathom that way of thinking.
 
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I didn't think I had it years ago and I went with my daughter who organised her own diagnosis as an adult. The two doctors in the room were talking about things and I said "I know I'm not autistic because......". They just smirked at each other and I knew :lol:

🤣
I think the biggest difficulty I have being autistic is getting my head around how other people think. I get into bother on here quite a bit and get accused of all sorts of stuff. Apparently I'm racist, homophobic, right wing, sexist and a Russian apologist :lol:. It's quite amusing really because I'm non of these things.

I don't think a neurotypical person can often grasp that someone can pull them up for talking shit but still have a generally similar view. You're either with them or against them and I can't fathom that way of thinking.
I don't think that's an autism thing mate. Some folks are just allergic to nuance. Any praise for anything one person has done must be met with criticism of something entirely unrelated they did 5 years ago.
 
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I don't think that's an autism thing mate. Some folks are just allergic to nuance. Any praise for anything one person has done must be met with criticism of something entirely unrelated they did 5 years ago.
It's more that that though. You can say something factual and people will get angry about it. I find it weird.
 
Re. the conversation above about Autism, I got a diagnosis when I was 40. Been quite odd suddenly realising there was an explanation for situations I've been through in life.

Difficulty expressing emotions, especially inappropriate emotions, has always been an issue.
Bottled anger and exploding, humour at deeply wrong times - as a kid I could never work out why people didn't laugh when I did. Even into adulthood there have been situations where I've genuinely stood in an argument and been totally unable to accept any other point of view but my own, even though I can repeat back the other persons logic. There'll be times it just doesn't click.

Absolute focus and obsession with one subject then suddenly switching to something else - it wasn't enough to know a bit I had to know it all and still get deeply frustrated when I can't get the hang of something.

Oh and personal interactions - there are times when the missus will be weeping and I'm standing there and have an internal monolgue going - I should hold her, I should say this, I should do that - it's like I'm playing a game and there are certain choices I make to get past this puzzle. This one really bothers me, as I still feel like there's something 'broken' in me because it doesn't feel natural.
 
Re. the conversation above about Autism, I got a diagnosis when I was 40. Been quite odd suddenly realising there was an explanation for situations I've been through in life.

Difficulty expressing emotions, especially inappropriate emotions, has always been an issue.
Bottled anger and exploding, humour at deeply wrong times - as a kid I could never work out why people didn't laugh when I did. Even into adulthood there have been situations where I've genuinely stood in an argument and been totally unable to accept any other point of view but my own, even though I can repeat back the other persons logic. There'll be times it just doesn't click.

Absolute focus and obsession with one subject then suddenly switching to something else - it wasn't enough to know a bit I had to know it all and still get deeply frustrated when I can't get the hang of something.

Oh and personal interactions - there are times when the missus will be weeping and I'm standing there and have an internal monolgue going - I should hold her, I should say this, I should do that - it's like I'm playing a game and there are certain choices I make to get past this puzzle. This one really bothers me, as I still feel like there's something 'broken' in me because it doesn't feel natural.
I just said things and my ex thought I meant something completely different to what I said. I could say something nice and it would turn into an argument.
 
i'd try and reassure him its part of his personality and that it's okay to do it
Emotionally stuff happens as you grow etc
Then move on to say ,wrongly its always been bandied as a sign of weakness etc
To this end he needs to try and think about when he does it and whether he can control it a bit to stop people mocking him etc
Tell him its ok to have a little cry with his parent or whatever
 

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