Have you ever stolen anything while drunk?

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Kevin Arnott's right boot said:
Many years ago, when I was 18, I was on my way home from the pub. I had to cross the railway line at the station, and noticed that one of the large station signs had fallen down, and decided I would have it in the back garden (I was living at my sister's house at the time, so God knows what she and my brother-in-law would have made of it).

Anyway, this was a metal sign, roughly 8 feet long, and I couldn't even lift it, so had to drag it. I was still on the pub side of the line, and couldn't get this sign up the footbridge steps, so dragged it down the road, over the road bridge and up my road, which added around half a mile onto my walk, with this loud clanking noise of metal scraping along the road behind me the whole way.

I was about 200 yards from home when, of course, a police car pulled up and the coppers asked what the hell I thought I was doing. Presumably somebody had phoned up to complain about the noise in the early hours of the morning.

The coppers then made me drag it all the way back again, while they followed in the car to make sure I put it back :lol:

Tbh, once I sobered up, I thought that was excellent policing, as it taught me far more of a lesson than a caution or small fine would have done.
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The lesson being - nick something a bit smaller.
 


A for sale sign from outside the Bull and Bush in Golders Green. I took it onto the tube and struggled to get it up the escalator at Camden as it was so heavy it was pulling me back down. When I got outside I was picked up by the police.

The keys to the front door of the Polytechnic of Norrh London.

My mate knicked a large Victorian door outside Baker Street. We carried onto the tube and made people knock on it as they got on and off. We then carried it through Rickmansworth.
 
Went to showcase cinema down Stockton when phantom menace came out. Me and my mates were having a spliff in the car about midnight, saw a lad come running out of pizza Hut with a 7 foot jarjar binks, not a cardboard cut out but a proper cast, just holding him round the waist and running as fast as he could :lol:

We'd been in pizza Hut earlier and it was massive, cant believe anyone would try and knick it :lol:
 
Lambton lion park one afternoon after an all nighter and morning went in mates-van three in the front three in the back, back doors slightly open and lads in back managed to entice a f***ing git baboon in so stopped van and quickly ran round and shut the doors no one about saw us.Hell on as we drove further around park then stopped and then reopened the doors the four of them had been fighting each other the baboon had taken a couple of cracks but the lads were well bloodied, The baboon fucked off how no one saw us I'll never know.
 
Must admit that many years ago, while drunk and on my way back to my room at Durham University, I spotted that a window of the Royal County Hotel was open. This was too good a chance to miss so I slipped in, tried the till (empty) and decided to take a chair home as a souvenir.

The most elegant theft though was my mate William who climbed up the wall and stole the "B" from the sign on the side of the Barclays Bank on New Elvet during his first term. At the end of the second year he stole one of the "A"s reckoning it was the only BA he was going to get out his time at Durham.
 
T_Bone said:
I haven't mentioned you for months. You were a wanker months ago and you still are.
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Yet you still feel the need to mention me in a comment. You need to get yourself some help, others have said about it in the past too, just put the bottle down and go to bed before you make a tit of yourself yet again.
 
duff_man said:
Yet you still feel the need to mention me in a comment. You need to get yourself some help, others have said about it in the past too, just put the bottle down and go to bed before you make a tit of yourself yet again.
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Ha, your,patter is still the same and still stinks. Is this the best you can do ?
If we are to believe you you are now the leader of men. God help them.
Tit did you say ?
 
Worst one I "have seen" was probably when "a mate" pulled a metal tube full of plastic cups off the wall in a hotel and took it. "My mate" shat it in the morning when people were asking questions and pointing to the CCTV pointing at a hole in the wall.

Luckily another mate squashed it down flat, folded it up, put it in his case and just walked off with it.

He's never mentioned it since either, the cool mofo.
 
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