Favourite Fools n Horses quotes?

[Napoleon Dynamite]

Vot is your name

 

[Binxy]

Trigger - "what do you thinks wrong with him?"

Mike - "well snow blindness would be my guess"

Trigger - " I thought he was pissed"

 

[Bigdog]

Say something in aikido

 

[waddy999]

Del ordering his Indian meal.
Waiter: ...and what kind of rice sir?
Del: Uncle Ben's??

 

[mini-x2]

I get better looking every day. I can’t wait for tomorrow.

 

[Dark Traveller]

Albert “During the...”
Del “If you say during the war, I'll pour this cup of tea over your head!”
Albert “I wasn't going to say during the war!”
Del “Alright then.“
Albert “Bloody little know all!”
Del “Sorry”
Albert “That's alright. During the 1939-1945 conflict with Germany...”

 

[safcrob]

Rodney - So that tin saved his life
Grandad - Not really cos the bullet bounced of and blew his brains out.

 

[White city Boy]

Uncle Albert - whenever I see a German war Film and I hear the word nien , I think of Helga

Rodney - why’s cos how many fingers she had
Del - she walks in and lights up a room (talking about raquel )

Rodney - normally your birds walk in and light up a fag

 

[Northern_chappy]

"Crwying"

 

[Lionel Hutzz]

"We just followed the Seacat"
"Oh so thats how you got to Hull"
"No thats how we got back to Zebrugger"

 

[JAZZMANB]

Can't remember a single line
Loved it
30 years ago

 

[errant]

Can't remember a single line
Loved it
30 years ago

I do wonder if some of it hasn’t aged quite well...

Rodney: it’s not fair...
Del: Nor's Frank Bruno's arse but you don't keep on about it!

 

[Henry_Hill]

Cass “if you must know Del, Rodney and i are trying for a baby”

Del “ ok i’ll get off the phone then”

 

[MEEKLANGLEYFTM]

Grandad: What kind of financial advisor goes out for an emporer burger n comes back with a cheese burger

 

[Wansbeck Viking]

When Del finds out Rodney is dating an older woman.


Del: 40......... 40, you're not being serious are ya.

Rodney: What's wrong with going out with a women of 40.

Del: Nothing, nothing at all if you happen to be 50! blimey she's even too old for me.

Grandad: Well, I'd have to think twice.

 

[Jap Stammer]

Not the TV show but a few years ago was on holiday with the lads and we went into a bar called 'Fools and Horses'.

Asked if we could order some bait with our drinks and the barman came over to our table - it was burger and chips all round until one of the lads asked if they had any mussels.

Barman looks at him, walks out the front door and looks up and around. Came back in and said "Sorry mate, was just checking to see if someone had put up a facking Michelin star when I wasn't looking'.

Another burger and chips it was.

 

[Snugster]

Uncle Albert referring to his naval career ~

"It was so cold the flame froze on my lighter".

 

[BROOMFIELD]

Del asks Mike the barman what's on the hot plate? Beef stew says Mike, Del, not sure about that with this mad cow disease doing the rounds, Trigger, been eating beef all my life, never done me any harm, Del, gi

 

[Kent_Mackem]

Yeah, but not at night!

The best bit about that line is David Jason's reaction. He's in a deep sea diving suit and his head turns insde but the helmet stays still.
It's his little twiches and expressions that are so good. A naturally funny actor.

I thought he said "You're telling me !" ?

That was "Cannute" - but I have never understood the punchline.

 

[Dan..Dan..Dan..Dan]

I 'ate you Butler.