Discussion in 'SMB' started by Maravilla, Nov 10, 2013.
Aw pet.... Where are you on holiday at ??
Salou it's also a double edged sword couple of bites of food I'm in pain but the anti depressants I'm on make me starving
I’ve just had an enormous bust up with the Mrs (no) and had the full inquisition of my mam and dad. I can’t go home or go to my mam and dads because my mam is the most antagonistic person I know. We can’t be left alone for long because she will start an argument with me. And I’m convinced the rest of my family members think I’m a bit of a waste of space.
Been coming a while - would have happened years ago if it wasn’t for the kids. I thought I was in an okay place since I left teaching but lately I’ve felt useless as I can’t find other work. Starting to get concerned about the financial situation now as well and I don’t want to end up in a hole with panic attacks again. The only thing that keeps my head right is hitting the gym.
Ultimately I don’t know if I’ve been trying to do the right thing staying with the Mrs for the sake of the kids and her prospective career despite the arguments and stuff, or whether or not I’m a coward because I don’t have the balls to end it with her and face the wrath of everyone. I’m starting to feel like the latter and it adds to the fact I feel useless at the moment.
Fresh start might be the best thing for me. Or it could be the worst.
Hope it settles and you feel better soon.
That's a tough one! It all seems to be one big interlinked mess so it needs breaking down into chunks and deal with each chunk.
Ignore what your family think of you. Don't let them make you feel like a waste of space. You're not.
What sort of work are you looking for? Is there any training or short courses you could do that would help?
Only you can decide with the Mrs but it's something that is bothering you and needs sorting. Would you be able to have a civilised chat with her and see if there is a way of working out your problems?
Keep going to the gym. That is a really useful thing you have and it's important you keep doing that. Tough day here but I've been boxing tonight and punched all my stresses out!
Pros and cons lists might be useful in making sense of things as well. Take your time though and don't rush things. Make sure what you decide is the right thing for you to do.
Keep talking if it helps. Take care marra xx
Only thing you missed out there was what do YOU want, and where do YOU want to be. You matter as well marra. Can't blame you for leaving teaching; it's shit. I did it for 23 years and it nearly killed me. What do you want to do each day? Answer that one then you have a plan to get going me marra.
Hope you can find the answers to some of the questions that are plaguing you.
I'm a teacher currently on the sick and plan to leave the profession (full time anyway) and am terrified about finding another job.
Had a better day today like just avoided the Mrs hit the gym then went out with the bairn and her nursery for their park walk thing.
Work wise I want something where I don’t dread going to work. Got to the stage doing the teaching that I was dreading it, same as my last job (mainly because of the people)
I feel like I’ve kept a lass and two small kids financially going for five years and I’m worried that she won’t cope if I leave her. Like even now I’m still paying all the bills and rent and she’s refusing to pay anything if I leave. I couldn’t put the kids through any uncertainty.
Pleased you had a better day.
You need to work out what sort of work would suit you best. You can still use the careers advice service. They might be able to sit down with you and go through options and find the kind of jobs you're best suited to.
Does your Mrs work? If it would help, you could write a list of her income and outgoings as if you were not there and see if she can manage. That will give you clarity on that part. If she can't, there's options like moving somewhere cheaper and stuff. I know you don't want to put the bairns through things, but it's also not nice living in a house where the parents don't want to be together. You need to find a solution that works for all of you, either together or apart.
Stressed about job centre tomorrow and my chest and back pains getting bad @Ginger John
Do you think it's just anxiety? Try not to worry about the appointment if you can.
First time iv been for ages usually just phone appointments nah because iv had ulcers and other stuff but maybe there linked or made worse
Might be just the upheaval of coming back off holiday and all that as well. Did you have a good time while you were away?
Aye but that was when the pain got worse, i was meant to get appointment for x ray but been sent a different one for consultation so npt sure whats happening
Try not to worry until you hear what they say. Easier said than done I know.
Just shame its not until july 25th i have had some good news as well though so not all bad
Good news is good
Yeh not sure i can say yet but its about time
Thanks for the help its weird im more open to chatting on here
I was quite impressed by the job centre after dreading going there earlier this year. I'd last been ages ago and they were all knobs, but this time they were actually nice people who wanted to help.
Bloke i see is canny just i get anxious
A couple of weeks ago a beloved family pet died unexpectedly while we were away on holiday. There's an extra 'oh fuck' to this story though, as it happened exactly, to the very day, 40 years after my father died. I could really do with some help and advice on grief and grieving. Books, CBT exercises to help work it through, whatever. It's thrown me back a long way.
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