Discussion in 'SMB' started by Maravilla, Nov 10, 2013.

  1. Jimmer13

    Jimmer13 Midfield

    Every one deals with things differently, what works for some may not work with others. The problem trying to analyse yourself is it does not work. You just try and find what works for you.

    Your are to close to the situation and have a blinkered view, like we all do of ourselves. When dealing with it yourself, you are quite insular, but fail-safe mechanisms, e.g. how your dealing with issues can collapse without warning.

    Your thoughts are not unique, everyone with issues tries to analyse themselves. It took me over four years of keeping everything locked up in my head, before I admitted that I had a problem and was getting worse after nearly suffering a meltdown. Kept trying to snap myself out of it.

    Thought I had been cured, after treatment for PTSD some years ago, but can come back and bite your bum. Know exactly what the trigger was and when, but no idea of the why.

    Either failed to see the signs, or ignored them, at some point in time you have to get the illness treated and need expert assistance for that. If I could have carried on dealing with it, then I probably would have.

    But my head went tilt and said hang on had enough here. Medication has stopped me slipping over the edge as I was approaching burnout with not many options left.

    Now on medication which has stabilised my mood swings and waiting to start a treatment course, when a place is available. More people need help than there are places oddly enough!

    Just keep on one day at a time, working for me and I hope everyone stays safe. It calms me writing this and quite therapeutic, please accept my apologies for a bit of a rambling post.


    I was the same at one point and forced myself to get out and do stuff, now I do stuff because I find it keeps the black dog from biting my arse.

    We have all been there fella, fight the bugger and do not let it win

    Troubled souls on a stormy sea without the aid of a life preserver, but in hope of assistance from like minded kindred souls.

    Quite a few of us in stormy waters, no surprise to be a product of a broken society for many different reasons.
    Last edited: Mar 10, 2019
  2. You can get yourself into a trap of being anxious about situation where you might be anxious and that makes it worse. Kind of like a vicious circle.

    Like a plane journey. I used to get myself so anxious in case I had a panic attack on the plane as you can't run out and escape from a plane. Then I'd more likely be anxious on the plane because I'd wound myself up so much.

    I found pep talks in my head helped. I told the anxiety issues to fuck off and convinced myself I was going to get on the plane and nothing was going to happen. I kept up the pep talk on the plane telling myself I was doing canny and congratulated myself when I'd survived the journey.

    That probably sounds mad but being my own coach works for me. Went to Amsterdam on the plane last month without batting an eyelid.

    Keeping busy helps a lot as if you're mind is distracted, you're less likely to be anxious. I carry my tablet when I'm travelling and get lost in a book.

    Best of luck with that xx

    My Mam's just had something where she had to wipe poo samples on pieces of card and post them off somewhere to check for bowel cancer. She said it was something all over 60's have to do. There's something else we have to look forward too :lol:
    Last edited: Mar 10, 2019
  3. Jimmer13

    Jimmer13 Midfield

    Deep joy at least you get a card, better than that poster who used a piece of clothing and the reply wipe it on the cubicle wall you dirty bastard:eek::lol:
    Ginger John likes this.
  4. ChrisAshley

    ChrisAshley Striker

    Yeah at work I'm generally but sometimes as soon as I get in it can kick in and weekends are terrible, yesterday as soon as I woke up I felt anxious it's as if my brain knew I'm going to be anxious without having something to occupy my mind so instantly makes me anxious. I was ok today until an hour ago it kicked in and now I'm anxious just before going to sleep and I don't know why I am!
    Ginger John likes this.
  5. ---Nemo---

    ---Nemo--- Striker

    Yeh, routinely people of a certain age have to do this. The indignities of old age eh. :)
    Ginger John likes this.
  6. monkeytassle

    monkeytassle Striker

    I do this and I know why. I get anxious about most things but money first and foremost. Then can't or won't show any outward signs and then I get into a self repeating spiral. What if etc. I get to sleep fine it's the early hours where it kicks in. I rarely sleep past 3am
  7. GTG

    GTG Striker

    I've still got my 2nd one to fill up and send off. They're like little advent calendars (where you know every day is going to be shit!).
    Jimmer13 and ---Nemo--- like this.
  8. niceonemarra

    niceonemarra Winger

    learning how to make loads of money is as easy as learning chess
  9. GTG

    GTG Striker

    This turned out to a tremendous evening! Was in bits a couple of times, as was probably everybody in the audience, and I'm sure it achieved one of its main aims of getting people to talk afterwards. Very talented young cast - I know 2 of them who are constantly dealing with their own MH issues and I would put money on that being true of the others, just from the intensity of their performances. Some canny tunes too, though they may not trouble the charts however much I would like to see 'Fuck Life' at number 1.

    Worth a visit if they put it on again elsewhere.
    Ginger John and Bishop Boy like this.
  10. monkeytassle

    monkeytassle Striker

    Not here
  11. niceonemarra

    niceonemarra Winger

  12. Bit of Monday morning blues?

    I'm chewing over the funeral at the moment. I feel like I want to stand up and read something out, but we're expecting 150+ people and I've never spoken in front of that many before.
  13. bigmarlon

    bigmarlon Midfield

    My Dad wrote a letter to his mates before he died. I was going to read it out at the wake afterwards but bottled it (I stutter when I'm anxious), so my Bro-in-law did... very badly. He mumbled his way through and nobody really listened. I regret not even trying.

    I've since learned that speaking in public isn't hard at all, even for me, a chronic stutterer. I do it all the time now. Once you start reading the anxiousness just falls away. By the time you're halfway through you strangely actually start to enjoy it.

    Practice with a few mates first and you'll see that once you start it's piss easy, it's nowt. You'll be proud of yourself for having the balls to get up and do it, and I know your Dad will too. He'll be looking down saying.. "That's my girl" :cool::lol:

    Good luck, Becs. Keep us updated!
    Ginger John and matt228 like this.
  14. matt228

    matt228 Midfield Contributor

    As odd as it may sound, delivering a eulogy may be a relatively simple exercise in terms of public speaking, which is tricky in itself. It is hard to write and hard to deliver, but you'll never have a more sympathetic audience.
    Bishop Boy, bigmarlon and Ginger John like this.
  15. Uncle D

    Uncle D Midfield

    You can do it mate.
    Ginger John likes this.
  16. Laeotaekhun

    Laeotaekhun Striker

    Don't worry about it, you'll be fine.

    Just take a big breath before you start to compose yourself and then speak slowly (using pauses for effect) and project your voice to the back of the room - it can help to pick out a couple of faces there and imagine you're talking to them.

    Also, don't forget that everyone there will be on your side and wanting you to do well.
    Uncle D, Flared Hicks and Ginger John like this.
  17. Bishop Boy

    Bishop Boy Striker

    As said elsewhere you will have a sympathetic audience and you will kick yourself if you dont do it.

    What is worse, regretting something you did, or something you didn't?
    Laeotaekhun and Ginger John like this.
  18. Jimmer13

    Jimmer13 Midfield

    Crappy start to the day :lol:

    You will be fine, your Dad was worth it and will be looking down on you, just get in that he was and is a MLF, who will still follow the team!

    It's is another positive memory on a sad day for all. Best wishes xxxx
    Last edited: Mar 11, 2019
    coyneeee, GTG and Ginger John like this.
  19. I will get that in. When I talked to him, the top two topics of conversations were football or the dogs!

    It's not until the 22nd March. It's busy at the crem.
    RossTheNinja, Jimmer13 and bigmarlon like this.
  20. bigmarlon

    bigmarlon Midfield

    You can always change your mind on the day if you're feeling too emotional. Don't pressure yourself man. You've got enough on your plate to be stressing about speeches.
    Ginger John likes this.

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