Depression

Great idea from @becs

Well, not enjoying being couped up in the house recently, especially after being out so much over Xmas, and it leaves me with too much thinking time. So I went round a mates on Friday, no drinking just chilled out with TV and tea, nice to have a good bit of crack with a close mate.

Saturday was the match, my complete lack of willpower saw me have a few pre match pints (Probably just as well really), went back to my local for a couple afterwards and a mate came in and announced he had got engaged, so it ended up being a late one but always good to celebrate good news

Yesterday was a second date with a girl, to be honest I can't see any long term potential, not because we don't get on but i don't think we would be well suited to anything serious, however I'm pleased that I'm not going all in and to be blunt, I find her seriously attractive and will gladly have some fun and see where it leads, again just enjoyed getting out of the house and being a bit of a pervert again :lol:

Back to work today, busy as anything again but the day flies and the depot is booming at the moment so it's all positive in that sense. Starting playing footy again next week to keep me active, I'm terrible but it will be good to spend time with mates and keep fit during the week

Tonight, time to relax!
Good lad. Go for it. I know with the way I am I'm nee good for anyone. Don't want to drag people down so don't even try.
 


It's here today, I always forget how awful it feels until its back again. I feel numb, then tearful & utterly exhausted. I've got a horrible feeling of being trapped, breathing feels like an effort because my chest feels tight but then the thought of going outside is making me feel scared too. I want to go and hide behind the sofa upstairs but I don't want to worry the kids so I'm trying so hard to appear to be fine.

I'm tired, so tired of this. It goes away and I feel ok and I hope against hope that it'll last, sometimes it feels suffocating knowing this is never really going to leave me. That I have a horrible illness that even medicated like I am now it can still come crawling back.
 
It's here today, I always forget how awful it feels until its back again. I feel numb, then tearful & utterly exhausted. I've got a horrible feeling of being trapped, breathing feels like an effort because my chest feels tight but then the thought of going outside is making me feel scared too. I want to go and hide behind the sofa upstairs but I don't want to worry the kids so I'm trying so hard to appear to be fine.

I'm tired, so tired of this. It goes away and I feel ok and I hope against hope that it'll last, sometimes it feels suffocating knowing this is never really going to leave me. That I have a horrible illness that even medicated like I am now it can still come crawling back.

Sorry to hear that.

It will improve with time... don't lose sight of that.
 
It's here today, I always forget how awful it feels until its back again. I feel numb, then tearful & utterly exhausted. I've got a horrible feeling of being trapped, breathing feels like an effort because my chest feels tight but then the thought of going outside is making me feel scared too. I want to go and hide behind the sofa upstairs but I don't want to worry the kids so I'm trying so hard to appear to be fine.

I'm tired, so tired of this. It goes away and I feel ok and I hope against hope that it'll last, sometimes it feels suffocating knowing this is never really going to leave me. That I have a horrible illness that even medicated like I am now it can still come crawling back.

I hope that no matter how hard it is at the moments the crumbs of comfort might be that you can see people's journeys through the illness on this thread and see it does eventually get better.

It's awful in the depths of it, but it will get better!
 
I haven't read this entire thread but the level of support and time given by all concerned in the parts I have read is incredible. I am very lucky that i don't suffer like many on here so it may seem patronising but the sheer scale of the problem regarding depression in developed society is mind blowing. It really is an epidemic that needs to be sorted.

It is a major problem and is hidden in so many cases. I wish only the best for anyone suffering.
 
It's here today, I always forget how awful it feels until its back again. I feel numb, then tearful & utterly exhausted. I've got a horrible feeling of being trapped, breathing feels like an effort because my chest feels tight but then the thought of going outside is making me feel scared too. I want to go and hide behind the sofa upstairs but I don't want to worry the kids so I'm trying so hard to appear to be fine.

I'm tired, so tired of this. It goes away and I feel ok and I hope against hope that it'll last, sometimes it feels suffocating knowing this is never really going to leave me. That I have a horrible illness that even medicated like I am now it can still come crawling back.

I'm still up for a coffee one day next week if you feel up to it, but I'll not be offended if you can't make it. Look after yourself and we'll talk loads and try put the world to rights if we can xx

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I've been trying to bump the thread all day but it wouldn't let me until now!

Sunday Club: how's everyone doing and what positive things have you done over the last week?

I took a day off work and spent it with my Mam while Dad was at a day care unit. We had a lovely day and it really cheered her up, so I'm going to do that more often.

The Calm app from Google Play store is brilliant! You're supposed to sit and listen to it, but I've been laying on my back in bed and listening to it when I get into bed. It really clears my mind and I've been just rolling over and going to sleep straight afterwards. I've slept over 6½ hours each night this week apart from the night when it was really windy which seemed to wake many people up. I've signed up as a subscriber and I'd highly recommend it.

Blue Monday tomorrow which is supposed to be the most depressing day of the year, so have some preemptive hugs all round xx
 
I've been trying to bump the thread all day but it wouldn't let me until now!

Sunday Club: how's everyone doing and what positive things have you done over the last week?

I took a day off work and spent it with my Mam while Dad was at a day care unit. We had a lovely day and it really cheered her up, so I'm going to do that more often.

The Calm app from Google Play store is brilliant! You're supposed to sit and listen to it, but I've been laying on my back in bed and listening to it when I get into bed. It really clears my mind and I've been just rolling over and going to sleep straight afterwards. I've slept over 6½ hours each night this week apart from the night when it was really windy which seemed to wake many people up. I've signed up as a subscriber and I'd highly recommend it.

Blue Monday tomorrow which is supposed to be the most depressing day of the year, so have some preemptive hugs all round xx

Thanks for sharing that one. :lol:
 
I've been trying to bump the thread all day but it wouldn't let me until now!

Sunday Club: how's everyone doing and what positive things have you done over the last week?

I took a day off work and spent it with my Mam while Dad was at a day care unit. We had a lovely day and it really cheered her up, so I'm going to do that more often.

The Calm app from Google Play store is brilliant! You're supposed to sit and listen to it, but I've been laying on my back in bed and listening to it when I get into bed. It really clears my mind and I've been just rolling over and going to sleep straight afterwards. I've slept over 6½ hours each night this week apart from the night when it was really windy which seemed to wake many people up. I've signed up as a subscriber and I'd highly recommend it.

Blue Monday tomorrow which is supposed to be the most depressing day of the year, so have some preemptive hugs all round xx

Hi @becs, reporting in for Sunday Club, but don't have much to report. I stayed away from alcohol for another week (nothing all year to date) and I kept work to work hours (no overtime and no worrying) so I guess that's something but I feel like I had those in my control anyway so nothing new. I did arrange for my best mate to come and visit me in a few weeks (first time I've seen him since about May last year) so that's something to look forward to and will get me out of the flat and socialising a bit. Next week, I'm going to keep up the things mentioned, I'm going to get back to walking to work and back instead of taking the bus and I'm going to clean my flat spotlessly and to a standard that my mam would be proud of (not just a quick once over to keep it tidy) :)
 
Drank bit too much this weekend, not the greatest mood now.

Always seem to turn positives into negatives, started seeing a lass a bit from school who haven't seen for years, now just constantly fretting about it! Weird as fuck me like.
 
Fighting like mad at the moment, got myself out the house to meet a friend this afternoon. Managed & had a nice time & on the bus heading home I saw two red kites swooping about. I love stuff like that & felt genuinely happy, it might sound a bit daft but it felt like a bit of a reward for making myself go out.

Planning to meet at least one other friend for cuppas this week, trying to start using my mindfulness again & been recommended some yoga classes on YouTube so might give that a go! Really should get myself to the gym too but I have to be careful not to try too much too fast.
 
Mixed week.... Definitely crashed a bit on Thursday, but I've had some lovely time outdoors with the dogs, eaten sensibly, looked after myself and drank sensibly apart from one night.

Been using the Calm app, same as @becs but I use it in the bath. Find the water calming as well.
 
Fighting like mad at the moment, got myself out the house to meet a friend this afternoon. Managed & had a nice time & on the bus heading home I saw two red kites swooping about. I love stuff like that & felt genuinely happy, it might sound a bit daft but it felt like a bit of a reward for making myself go out.

Planning to meet at least one other friend for cuppas this week, trying to start using my mindfulness again & been recommended some yoga classes on YouTube so might give that a go! Really should get myself to the gym too but I have to be careful not to try too much too fast.
Good luck.
 
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Fighting like mad at the moment, got myself out the house to meet a friend this afternoon. Managed & had a nice time & on the bus heading home I saw two red kites swooping about. I love stuff like that & felt genuinely happy, it might sound a bit daft but it felt like a bit of a reward for making myself go out.

Planning to meet at least one other friend for cuppas this week, trying to start using my mindfulness again & been recommended some yoga classes on YouTube so might give that a go! Really should get myself to the gym too but I have to be careful not to try too much too fast.

Nice one, sounds excellent, aye one step at a time. I sometimes like just going down the gym for a swim, than a tea and read the paper. Gets me out of the house.

Positive of the week -
had a sober Saturday night for the first time in months, I guess.

Absolutely no preemptive 'Blue Monday' feelings here either tbh.

Not at work till tonight, back to London.

Blue Monday has hit massively! Woke up too early worrying about it

Going to get myself out of the house this morning, try and keep busy.
 
Blue Monday has hit massively! Woke up too early worrying about it

Going to get myself out of the house this morning, try and keep busy.

Go for a swim or something like you mentioned about and let endorphins kill blue Monday :D
 
Go for a swim or something like you mentioned about and let endorphins kill blue Monday :D

I have a train at 5:30 to London and then I start work in the office at 10:30pm, so I normally try and sleep but can't!

So breakfast in the local cafe, then skype my friend, then go for a swim.

That should take me to about lunch time!
 
I have a train at 5:30 to London and then I start work in the office at 10:30pm, so I normally try and sleep but can't!

So breakfast in the local cafe, then skype my friend, then go for a swim.

That should take me to about lunch time!

Sounds like a good start to the day!

My plans for the day have been changed, my youngest is poorly so is off school. It will keep me occupied anyway.
 

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