Depression

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Black Cat Gypsy said:
Yeah. He signed me off work. I plan to speak to him today.
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Sounds like a good idea to me mate. I'm struggling to get myself into work at the moment and regularly make excuses for being late, but being there at least can take my mind off things for some of the day as I need to be as focused as I can. It's the getting there that is the hardest part as I really don't want to get out of bed and face the world at the moment. I hope your chat with the Doctor gives you some hope today.
 


Black Cat Gypsy said:
Yeah. He signed me off work. I plan to speak to him today.
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If he's not available give 111 or go to a walk in centre if you can.

I feel the lowest I've felt in a while today, I just sat for half an hour in the car park debating whether to go in or whether to drive off, I finally went in but I really can't see me making it through the day without having to be sick or go home.
 
Phil_Harmonic said:
If he's not available give 111 or go to a walk in centre if you can.

I feel the lowest I've felt in a while today, I just sat for half an hour in the car park debating whether to go in or whether to drive off, I finally went in but I really can't see me making it through the day without having to be sick or go home.
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Keep fighting mate, it took me 90 minutes to get out of bed for work yesterday, and by then I was already half an hour late, once I got there I was ready to walk out again after 15 minutes, I couldn't work out if I needed to cry or be sick, after an hour or so I got a bit better and had a laugh with the fella I work in the office with, it was a real struggle of a day but you can get through them. For me, work usually offers a release from how I feel when I'm on my own.
 
becs said:
That's what my friend was put on. He's been on it six weeks now and he just feels like numb. He's not as down as he was, but he's not really feeling anything. He said he just kind of exists. His sleep is disrupted which doesn't help. The sickness did pass after a few weeks and he tried a small amount of drink on New Years Eve and he was ok. He's going back for a review in a couple of weeks.



That's the weirdest part of this illness. You can be plodding along just fine, then it just takes one thing that is probably something quite trivial and it sends you off into a spiral.

Bit of a shitty Christmas here. After looking forward to two weeks off with the bairns, I came down with a nasty viral chest infection and spent most of the week before Christmas laying on the sofa and all our plans went out the window.

Back to work this morning and I've still got a cough, catarrh and sore throat lingering on.

Next years Christmas holidays are weird. The bairns break up on the 22nd Dec but don't go back until the 10th Jan. I was playing around and found some stupidly cheap flights to Lanzarote on New Years Day 2018. So I don't care what happens in the run up to Christmas or how shitty it is, as once it's out of the way, I'm sodding off to lay in the sunshine :D
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Becs I'm so lucky I don't suffer but I absolutely hate this time of year, it makes me miserable (not saying that's the same it's not) about 5 years ago I started going away the beginning of January and it's the best thing I've done. Off to Manchester today fly tomorrow and by the time we get back January is almost done. If I could only have one holiday a year it would be this one. You won't regret it
 
Thanks everyone. Even the few post this morning have helped. I'll you all know how I get on with the doctor.

The Breen Machine said:
Sounds like a good idea to me mate. I'm struggling to get myself into work at the moment and regularly make excuses for being late, but being there at least can take my mind off things for some of the day as I need to be as focused as I can. It's the getting there that is the hardest part as I really don't want to get out of bed and face the world at the moment. I hope your chat with the Doctor gives you some hope today.
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That's how I feel. Once I'm in there I'm fine. It's getting out of bed and the thoughts of traveling.
 
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Black Cat Gypsy said:
That's how I feel. Once I'm in there I'm fine. It's getting out of bed and the thoughts of traveling.
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Do you give yourself little pep talks? I know this sounds weird but I cheer myself on all day. If I feel like I don't want to work, I keep saying to myself "come on, you can do this" and then through the day I'll be going "gerrin lass, you've done an hour and you're doing canny" and so on. It really does help keep me going. It's worth a try anyway.

I like maths as well so on days when I'm not feeling well, I mentally mark the working day off in fractions or percentages and that keeps me going as well.

I'm struggling today so I'll be doing that. Still got this bug hanging around and I've been vomiting during the night again. Got a banging headache and still feel sick so currently debating if I should go to work or stay home.
 
becs said:
Do you give yourself little pep talks? I know this sounds weird but I cheer myself on all day. If I feel like I don't want to work, I keep saying to myself "come on, you can do this" and then through the day I'll be going "gerrin lass, you've done an hour and you're doing canny" and so on. It really does help keep me going. It's worth a try anyway.

I like maths as well so on days when I'm not feeling well, I mentally mark the working day off in fractions or percentages and that keeps me going as well.

I'm struggling today so I'll be doing that. Still got this bug hanging around and I've been vomiting during the night again. Got a banging headache and still feel sick so currently debating if I should go to work or stay home.
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That's not a bad idea. I might just try that!
 
Bad_mother said:
A good friend of mine sent me a sheet of stickers for achieving "adulting" goals
Getting out of bed
Wearing matching socks
Making the phone call you don't want to
etc.....
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I could do with some of those.

My barometer for feeling like shit at the moment is when I feel so apathetic I can't even be bothered to have a tug.
 
If any of you feel up to it, try getting a blank sheet of paper and write down how you feel. Even if it's just a volley of swearing, or you just rip it up as soon as it's done, finding a vent for how you feel, that's personal to you, and in control only by you, might help. Don't suffer in silence, even if the silence is broken by a few words on a scrap of paper.
 
The Hesford Diet said:
If any of you feel up to it, try getting a blank sheet of paper and write down how you feel. Even if it's just a volley of swearing, or you just rip it up as soon as it's done, finding a vent for how you feel, that's personal to you, and in control only by you, might help. Don't suffer in silence, even if the silence is broken by a few words on a scrap of paper.
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I think this is why I find this site so useful for this, I can't say in words how I feel but I can try and put it in writing on here and get some things off my chest.
 
The Hesford Diet said:
If any of you feel up to it, try getting a blank sheet of paper and write down how you feel. Even if it's just a volley of swearing, or you just rip it up as soon as it's done, finding a vent for how you feel, that's personal to you, and in control only by you, might help. Don't suffer in silence, even if the silence is broken by a few words on a scrap of paper.
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^this

Sometimes I write a post as if I was going to put on here or another forum and get everything off my chest, but then I just close the window instead of posting it. That helps clear my head.

If anyone wants to write stuff down and wants an outlet for it, feel free to PM it to me.
 
I'm keeping on keeping on (just about), the dread has already set in for my return to work Monday but I'll go, I just need to remember the positive reasons for working and the fact that I have managed to do it now for over 2 years. I don't think I'll ever be free of Depression, so I'm learning how to live and function with it as effectively as I can.
My son loves and needs me, that is my main reason for "keep on keeping on !" I will get down, but I can't afford for it to consume me as much as it has done over the years. I empathise and relate to everyone on here, I recognise many of the feelings / fears / frustrations within this thread and am glad folks feel safe to get things off their chests !
Never give up ! xx
 
Black Cat Gypsy said:
Just back home. The doctor say to try and ease myself back to work. We talked about setting little goals and targets. As faith would have it, an MMA & Boxing gym has opened up next door to the doctors and I know the bloke who runs it. His set up a men's kickboxing class for people who just want to get out and exercise. So I might sign up. That can be one of my targets.
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Good lad.
 
Black Cat Gypsy said:
Just back home. The doctor say to try and ease myself back to work. We talked about setting little goals and targets. As faith would have it, an MMA & Boxing gym has opened up next door to the doctors and I know the bloke who runs it. His set up a men's kickboxing class for people who just want to get out and exercise. So I might sign up. That can be one of my targets.
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That sounds really good and something really positive to invest in.

I know its cliched, but this time of year really is difficult. Not just for those of us who have anxiety or depression, but for every one. Unfortunately with the big highs of Christmas, comes the lows of a New Year.

Dont let your thoughts manifest. As hard as it is to get up, get out of bed and get ready. Go out and visit some one. Pop down the shops. Ring a friend. Post on here. Just make contact with people and interact with those outside of your own head.
 
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