Depression

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becs said:
Thanks. He's sticking with it for now to see what happens and has another GP appointment in a couple of weeks to review it.

Bit down here. I've mentioned about a female issue before that's been dragging on for over two years now. I finally got my GP to refer me to gynae at the hospital. That was a ballache as in Co Durham, GP's are no longer allowed to direct refer. She had to write a case study about me and present it to a panel (who have never met me before) and they decide if I am allowed to see a consultant. I passed that and had an appointment with a consultant today. Unfortunately there was a massive traffic jam and even though I'd left plenty of time for the journey and would have been there early in normal circumstances, the traffic jam meant I arrived 10 minutes late. Despite apologising profusely, he refused to see me because I wasn't on time and has discharged me back to my GP without even seeing me. I've rang the doctors to ask if I can be re-referred back but the receptionist didn't know what would happen now. She's going to speak to the doctor and get back to me. It's not really helped with the stress and worry, all for the sake of 10 minutes.

I also need another test on my bowel and I've been waiting since October for an appointment for that. I got home from work today and found an appointment in the post for tomorrow. I have to follow a strict no fibre diet for the 48 hours prior to the test, then fast on the day of the test. I haven't followed the diet as I didn't know about the appointment so I've had to ring and cancel that and have to wait for another one will be sent out in the post.

Still manically busy at work and still turning down work on weekends and week commencing the 19th. I've managed to stay strong and not crack despite the guilt trips!
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Someone close to me is on sertraline and its the sister drug to what I'm on Citalopram, we both drink alcohol but I think having a skin full might temporarily weaken its effects oh and drinking whilst going through the side effects stages make the side effects worse. They both give you side effects like mood swings in the first few weeks but after that they are excellent.
Sorry to hear about your bad day dealing with traffic jams etc but it couldn't be helped and I think it was harsh not to see you for being 10 mins late however he could have had another patient in. Just put it down to bad luck but, luck always changes.
 


becs said:
Thanks. He's sticking with it for now to see what happens and has another GP appointment in a couple of weeks to review it.

Bit down here. I've mentioned about a female issue before that's been dragging on for over two years now. I finally got my GP to refer me to gynae at the hospital. That was a ballache as in Co Durham, GP's are no longer allowed to direct refer. She had to write a case study about me and present it to a panel (who have never met me before) and they decide if I am allowed to see a consultant. I passed that and had an appointment with a consultant today. Unfortunately there was a massive traffic jam and even though I'd left plenty of time for the journey and would have been there early in normal circumstances, the traffic jam meant I arrived 10 minutes late. Despite apologising profusely, he refused to see me because I wasn't on time and has discharged me back to my GP without even seeing me. I've rang the doctors to ask if I can be re-referred back but the receptionist didn't know what would happen now. She's going to speak to the doctor and get back to me. It's not really helped with the stress and worry, all for the sake of 10 minutes.

I also need another test on my bowel and I've been waiting since October for an appointment for that. I got home from work today and found an appointment in the post for tomorrow. I have to follow a strict no fibre diet for the 48 hours prior to the test, then fast on the day of the test. I haven't followed the diet as I didn't know about the appointment so I've had to ring and cancel that and have to wait for another one will be sent out in the post.

Still manically busy at work and still turning down work on weekends and week commencing the 19th. I've managed to stay strong and not crack despite the guilt trips!
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That's really harsh That, would he not even add you to the end of the clinic? I bet if you'd been Early there'd have been an hours wait
 
Worst football match experience since the League Cup final yesterday.
Now I know depression transcends mere footballing matters & this really isn't relevant at all in this topic but I felt like utter shit about 30 hours ago.
Gutted. And faced with a 300 mile drive home.
Time, & a good nights sleep is a constant healer though.
Feel good again now though, as I suspected, was just the temporary mindset.

It's really nice & positive to actually have genuine reactionary ups & down again though in a non medicated state.
 
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Spending a few days back in the UK with my dad, having a pleasant time but knowing I've got the long journey home (4.5 hour drive, 3 hrs ferry, 2.5 hour drive all overnight) has set off the anxiety again.
Terrible choking sensation that's lasted most of today.
Wondering if deeply it's that I subconsciously don't want to go home ?
 
niceonemarra said:
Yes I'm sure it will be ok and after all is just a perspective I always look forward to Monday morning but when it gets there its hard to handle.
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I tend to pick up as the week goes along but Sunday night's are always a struggle for me, and barely get any sleep. I'm worse this time of year I think as well, think approaching the third Christmas in a row as a single man whilst all my mates get engaged and are having kids, gets to me, daft I know.
 
The Breen Machine said:
I'm worse this time of year I think as well, think approaching the third Christmas in a row as a single man whilst all my mates get engaged and are having kids, gets to me, daft I know.
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It's hard this time of year when you're single.

I don't have a works night out and I haven't been invited to any other festive nights out. That's one of the downsides of Facebook as it looks like everyone is out having a good time while I'm sitting at home alone having a conversation with the dog :oops:
 
The Breen Machine said:
I tend to pick up as the week goes along but Sunday night's are always a struggle for me, and barely get any sleep. I'm worse this time of year I think as well, think approaching the third Christmas in a row as a single man whilst all my mates get engaged and are having kids, gets to me, daft I know.
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I think whenever you're feeling down, regardless of your personal circumstances, the 'grass is greener' feelings tend to be there to kick you where it hurts. Try to be kind to yourself and I know it might sound obvious but if you're struggling to sleep don't force it, it turns the bedroom into somewhere that is associated with that insomniac feeling. Everyone has to find there own way of dealing with it, my personal technique is to listen to comedy podcasts. If I'm really tired it'll distract me enough to help me drift off to sleep & if I can't sleep it gives me something to concentrate on that drowns out the negative thoughts.
 
becs said:
It's hard this time of year when you're single.

I don't have a works night out and I haven't been invited to any other festive nights out. That's one of the downsides of Facebook as it looks like everyone is out having a good time while I'm sitting at home alone having a conversation with the dog :oops:
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I do get invites to places and gatherings but not as many as previous as it's all couples and I'd be the odd one out, I don't mind that so much but I get to this time of year and feel like it's a bit of a lonely Christmas for me, all I have is the pub and seeing familiar faces in there, not a bad thing but not quite how I'd want it to be.

mackem_jo2 said:
I think whenever you're feeling down, regardless of your personal circumstances, the 'grass is greener' feelings tend to be there to kick you where it hurts. Try to be kind to yourself and I know it might sound obvious but if you're struggling to sleep don't force it, it turns the bedroom into somewhere that is associated with that insomniac feeling. Everyone has to find there own way of dealing with it, my personal technique is to listen to comedy podcasts. If I'm really tired it'll distract me enough to help me drift off to sleep & if I can't sleep it gives me something to concentrate on that drowns out the negative thoughts.
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I usually leave the TV on in the background with a comedy show on, usually helps most nights, helps me drift off but it's keeping my mind unoccupied thats the hardest.
 
The Breen Machine said:
I get to this time of year and feel like it's a bit of a lonely Christmas for me, all I have is the pub and seeing familiar faces in there, not a bad thing but not quite how I'd want it to be.
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That's like me. I've only got my parents and my bairns and the youngest is at her Dad's on Christmas Day. I know I have to share her but I miss her so much.

We were going to have the family Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve afternoon so she could attend but my middle one has been told he has to work until 5pm. We're now having a somewhat rushed Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve evening and hoping my Dad can stay awake as his meds make him sleepy by early evening.
 
becs said:
That's like me. I've only got my parents and my bairns and the youngest is at her Dad's on Christmas Day. I know I have to share her but I miss her so much.

We were going to have the family Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve afternoon so she could attend but my middle one has been told he has to work until 5pm. We're now having a somewhat rushed Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve evening and hoping my Dad can stay awake as his meds make him sleepy by early evening.
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I mean I know there's plenty of people worse off on Christmas Day, I will at least see friends and have dinner with my parents, but everyone has an idealism don't they? and I'm not very good at coping with how different my reality is at times.
 
The Breen Machine said:
I mean I know there's plenty of people worse off on Christmas Day, I will at least see friends and have dinner with my parents, but everyone has an idealism don't they? and I'm not very good at coping with how different my reality is at times.
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It's the idealism that just reinforces it. I'm at work every day putting out displays in shops to help people have a "perfect" Christmas. It kind of sucks that I'm worn out and stressed to bits so everyone else can have a brilliant time while mine is going to be a kind of make the best of a difficult situation affair. That's what I'm not coping well with.
 
becs said:
It's the idealism that just reinforces it. I'm at work every day putting out displays in shops to help people have a "perfect" Christmas. It kind of sucks that I'm worn out and stressed to bits so everyone else can have a brilliant time while mine is going to be a kind of make the best of a difficult situation affair. That's what I'm not coping well with.
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Chin up Becs, I know that it will probably feel it's being rammed down your throat, seeing all these examples of "perfect" Christmas', but I am sure come the occasion you will enjoy the day and all worries will subside, that's what the wine is for afterall :lol:
 
The Breen Machine said:
I do get invites to places and gatherings but not as many as previous as it's all couples and I'd be the odd one out, I don't mind that so much but I get to this time of year and feel like it's a bit of a lonely Christmas for me, all I have is the pub and seeing familiar faces in there, not a bad thing but not quite how I'd want it to be.



I usually leave the TV on in the background with a comedy show on, usually helps most nights, helps me drift off but it's keeping my mind unoccupied thats the hardest.
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This sounds absolutely f***ing daft, but give it a go. :lol:

Whenever I get the recurring thoughts grimming up my head, I imagine them as marbles rolling about at the front of my brain, then roll them into a room at the back of my head and lock the door.
I heard the mental exercise once, randomly, and started trying it a few weeks ago, and it's weirdly effective. :lol:
 
ajthemackem said:
This sounds absolutely f***ing daft, but give it a go. :lol:

Whenever I get the recurring thoughts grimming up my head, I imagine them as marbles rolling about at the front of my brain, then roll them into a room at the back of my head and lock the door.
I heard the mental exercise once, randomly, and started trying it a few weeks ago, and it's weirdly effective. :lol:
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I've been doing it for 4 years now with the TV, not great on the electricity bill but when I was first struggling it helped me doze off, it's not always effective but most nights it does seem to help.

What happens if you lose your marbles? :lol:
 
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