Depression

Status
Not open for further replies.
Daddyo said:
Work hard,stay busy,dont drink alcohol,get plenty sleep,slow your life down............all helps....
Click to expand...

This is a massive thing for me like, 'the fear' after the night before makes me a f***ing nightmare to be around. sometimes even after a couple of sociable ones i'm a wreck. probably a combination of the hangover and my existing worries/troubles makes it seem worse like.

bet it builds up if you're on it every night too.
 


Had it for years, prob from the age of about 23-28. Got beat up very badly on xmas eve which triggered it. Hid it from the world, even my mam and dad who I lived with. I developed a very bad gambling addiction and drank heavily which I'm not blaming entirely on it but it was a major factor. I still get bouts of it now but nowhere near as bad as I used to be. Awful and if anyone has it don't be ashamed to seek help...
 
double maxim said:
This is a massive thing for me like, 'the fear' after the night before makes me a f***ing nightmare to be around. sometimes even after a couple of sociable ones i'm a wreck. probably a combination of the hangover and my existing worries/troubles makes it seem worse like.

bet it builds up if you're on it every night too.
Click to expand...
One of the reasons I'm knocking alcohol on the head for this month.
 
ayesane said:
Yeah but it if I was effected enough, or I couldn't snap out of it: it would be clinical depression..
Click to expand...

Bit more to clinical depression than feeling a bit crap about the Lads losing and not "snapping out of it" tbh.
 
the wife sometimes thinks I've got it and asks me a lot if I'm ok. Honestly feel fine and have a lot to be happy about. She accuses me of bottling things up but with me it's just pissed offishness. hate my job but love the weekends. Yesterday, after hearing the news about Podgy, i was upstairs quite a while. Mrs MWN got worried and shouted up... 'are you all right? MWN, are you alright, talk to me..'
Its all reet Mrs MWN, just having a really bad shite. It was anarl
 
kermode said:
Bit more to clinical depression than feeling a bit crap about the Lads losing and not "snapping out of it" tbh.
Click to expand...

you're right mate.. thats the daftest thing to ever get depressed about. BUT if that's the cause and you cannot snap out of it.. then you're clinically depressed.. :lol:

anyway, i put that football bit in for effect really. The loss of my farther knocked me for 6 and it took me a couple weeks but I could imagine never recovering from it while it was on-going.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
double maxim said:
This is a massive thing for me like, 'the fear' after the night before makes me a f***ing nightmare to be around. sometimes even after a couple of sociable ones i'm a wreck. probably a combination of the hangover and my existing worries/troubles makes it seem worse like.

bet it builds up if you're on it every night too.
Click to expand...

Its only now after 30 years ive cut down by 95% on my drinking that life has become a lot easier.....after 2 suicide attempts before.Every day is a pleasure now,there is no attraction to the darkness,and a head full of sunshine instead of thick black mud.Only fellow past sufferers will understand this i reckon.:neutral:
 
Guinness Guzzler said:
Cheers mate, and you're free to PM me anytime you want to as well. I think my experience is pretty much the same as yours- often I think "whats the f***ing point" but like yourself I do always remember that there are family and friends who need me, I'm very fortunate that I've never thought "they'd be better off without me" and I think the first time I ever feel like that is when I'd be straight off to the doctors. Its a bastard of an illness and there are so many people coping (or trying to cope) with it and so little discussion about it. Canny thread this like, its amazing when the SMB gets sensible for a thread or two!
Click to expand...

I'd say make an appointment at the doctors before you even start thinking like that mate, no harm in just having a word with someone. it's their job, they want to help people who are struggling.
 
oROSSo said:
have you spoke about this so candidly with friends and family? Just I know you said your dad posts on here too
Click to expand...

Orr aye mate, they all know the score. Especially him. A couple of my mates know aswell. Everyone is supportive, which is vital
 
I posted this on my FB a while ago & probably sums up how I feel when I'm depressed & exactly why it's so hard to spot the signs.

from personal experience the times I'm feeling the worse is the time that I outwardly project the happiest, so no-one can see what's inside. it's easier than hearing people tell you to 'chin up' or 'it could be worse' when you can't help how you feel. The real pain of depression comes from the guilt of knowing how lucky you are in other areas of life and yet you just can't feel it... you just can't feel anything but know this, depressives are the greatest actors about for the simple reason that when you feel so bad the only thing that can seem worse is to share the pain with others. I'll always be grateful for every single time I'm made it through & felt the fog lift.
Click to expand...

I have bi-polar & it's tough, my doc described it as like being epileptic, I'm never going to be 'cured', only 'stable' and with that comes the fear every time you feel a bit low, is this the start of something bad or just a crappy day. Conversely it also means that if I'm feeling particularly chipper there's the wariness that it might be a manic episode. I've also started to learn not to ask for help as much anymore... you try to put yourself out there but in my experience a lot of people will try to ignore what they're seeing rather than help... sad but true :-(

some of my loneliest experiences are matchdays, feeling lonely in a crowd of 40+ thousand is a horrible thing but my love of the Lads keeps me going. if i stayed home instead i'd be worse so I have to keep forcing myself out there & try to swallow the anxiety etc away.
 
kingbant1 said:
Had it for years, prob from the age of about 23-28. Got beat up very badly on xmas eve which triggered it. Hid it from the world, even my mam and dad who I lived with. I developed a very bad gambling addiction and drank heavily which I'm not blaming entirely on it but it was a major factor. I still get bouts of it now but nowhere near as bad as I used to be. Awful and if anyone has it don't be ashamed to seek help...
Click to expand...

That also sounds like reactive depression to a terrible event. When it happened to me, one of the best things that was said to me was that yes in a way I was going mad, but that was entirely and utterly normal and to be expected. That's the way we're wired: to get depressed when really big, bad stuff happens.

Just knowing that my depression was "normal", and that not to be depressed in those circumstances would have been, frankly, pretty weird, was an enormous help.

(BTW I recognise that some people sadly have depression which is not necessarily a reaction to a dreadful event but perhaps just part of their make-up.)
 
Guinness Guzzler said:
Cheers mate, and you're free to PM me anytime you want to as well. I think my experience is pretty much the same as yours- often I think "whats the f***ing point" but like yourself I do always remember that there are family and friends who need me, I'm very fortunate that I've never thought "they'd be better off without me" and I think the first time I ever feel like that is when I'd be straight off to the doctors. Its a bastard of an illness and there are so many people coping (or trying to cope) with it and so little discussion about it. Canny thread this like, its amazing when the SMB gets sensible for a thread or two!
Click to expand...

Indeed, very refreshing tbh
 
Guinness Guzzler said:
Cheers mate, and you're free to PM me anytime you want to as well. I think my experience is pretty much the same as yours- often I think "whats the f***ing point" but like yourself I do always remember that there are family and friends who need me, I'm very fortunate that I've never thought "they'd be better off without me" and I think the first time I ever feel like that is when I'd be straight off to the doctors. Its a bastard of an illness and there are so many people coping (or trying to cope) with it and so little discussion about it. Canny thread this like, its amazing when the SMB gets sensible for a thread or two!
Click to expand...
bet you never thought I'd start it ;)
 
Daddyo said:
Its only now after 30 years ive cut down by 95% on my drinking that life has become a lot easier.....after 2 suicide attempts before.Every day is a pleasure now,there is no attraction to the darkness,and a head full of sunshine instead of thick black mud.Only fellow past sufferers will understand this i reckon.:neutral:
Click to expand...

Fair play to ya mate, I'm nowhere near that bad with the creature like but i'm glad you've been able to find a balance. this thread is definitely putting a few things into a bit of perspective for me like.
 
naughtynose said:
Sorry mate, I can relate to that totally. These people who say 'pull yourself together' who dont know what its really like dont realise how fortunate they are to have not had it properly
Click to expand...

^^^^
This. I was lucky, managed to get some counselling though my renal clinic from a clinical psychologist. It wasn't easy but the psychologist gave me a few techniques to break the downward spiral and so far (six months) I've managed to re-engage with people I hadn't contacted for years.
 
janiep said:
That also sounds like reactive depression to a terrible event. When it happened to me, one of the best things that was said to me was that yes in a way I was going mad, but that was entirely and utterly normal and to be expected. That's the way we're wired: to get depressed when really big, bad stuff happens.

Just knowing that my depression was "normal", and that not to be depressed in those circumstances would have been, frankly, pretty weird, was an enormous help.

(BTW I recognise that some people sadly have depression which is not necessarily a reaction to a dreadful event but perhaps just part of their make-up.)
Click to expand...

Yeah you're prob right. I considered ending my life but knew deep down I wouldn't. One time I took tablets and sent my mate a text to say bye to him. It was more a cry for help to be honest and looking back even I didn't believe I was going to follow it through or else I wouldn't have texted him. My mind was all over the place at the time but you're right, it was probably a reaction to an awful event in my life...
 
ayesane said:
I know mate, and I would NEVER use those terms when talking to someone who I knew was clinically depressed.
Click to expand...

I think the lack of understanding is a real & avoidable handicap. As I've said I committed every ignorant error imaginable, mainly because I thought "depression" was just feeling "a bit down". It was a long hard road for me to work out exactly what it was & how just being there was a help without any hamfisted, crass efforts to cheer her up (Although for a brief period gift selection was easy as Absolut was her chosen medication!)

I have since helped others (properly!) & feel better equipped but never forget it is a dark, creeping illness that causes people to carry out extreme acts. I never in a million years thought I'd agree with JanieP (Hi, darlin'!) but she's right (for once!):)
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Back
Top