Been a tough week



Sorry for your loss.

Terrible watching your dad die. I know how you feel. It stays with you. Best wishes to you and yours.

"Staying strong" means fuck all in reality. It'll get to you eventually. When it does, just let it out.
 
offshore said:
Tuesday night mam rings to say dad's fell over in the house again ( Parkinsons) only to find him dead on the floor 5 mins after the call. So instinct kicks in and I start working on him as I tell her to ring an ambulance. So I continue for about 10 minutes and I get a response all be it a small one a response. I continue till the ambulance crew turned up. They take over and I still have to do cpr until another crew come. They give him adrenaline and for the first time in about 30 mins he' breathing on his own all be it not very good! They get him in the ambulance and I go with the fast car response woman to a&e. After about 20 mins of being in there I get called into a room to be told he died again in the ambulance and he's been rushed up to iccu. Another 40 mins or so they take us up to be told they have gave him drugs to put him under and is ventilated to help him breath. Doctor says come back tomorrow and we will know more, so me and mam go home (around 3.30am) Wednesday comes and my brothers come up from Kent and we go in to see him. Not a good sight as he's having some sort of fitting thing every few seconds. Doctor takes us down to a room and says well sorry but it looks like he's got massive brain damage from lack of oxygen but they won' know more till 24hrs when they take him off the drugs and try and wake him up... now Thursday and we get there for 12 and doctor says they stopped the drugs and he didn' respond so what do you want to do!!!! It's never a question i thought i would be asked so we said he would never want to be alive as a vegetable so turn it off. Fuck me it was the worst thing I've ever seen someone you love die infront of you!!!! Heart breaking is not the word. I feel like shit for bringing him back and putting him through 48thr of hell.. I just can' stop seeing him on the floor...sorry to go on but I need to tell someone.
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You've done what may could not, you saved your father's life - then handed him to the NHS who tried their best. Don't run yourself down for what is not your fault, or anyone elses, it was just time. Remember all the good times with dad - I'm sure there were many and don't dwell on what you couldn't control. Top work m8, and be proud.
 
You totally did the right thing mate, we all hope we would have done the same
At least you had that chance with him, my dad died last year from a heart attack, he had managed to call 999, a friend got to him first and didn't know what to do so rang me and I set straight off to his house, I live 10 miles from the house, ambulance was already there when I got there but it was too late for him.
 
Bloody hell, awful. You did everything you could though, remember that. I'm sure he'd have been grateful and proud of you.
 
Jeez, that is tragic!.. Sorry for your loss...... as others have said, you did the right thing, so don't feel down about that... you did all that you could do... sadly, in this case it was just not enough as by the sounds of it there was no way of bringing him back.
I'm sure he would have wanted the best for you all... try not to remember the immediate past... but remember the rest of his life and the better times you had together....
 
offshore said:
Tuesday night mam rings to say dad's fell over in the house again ( Parkinsons) only to find him dead on the floor 5 mins after the call. So instinct kicks in and I start working on him as I tell her to ring an ambulance. So I continue for about 10 minutes and I get a response all be it a small one a response. I continue till the ambulance crew turned up. They take over and I still have to do cpr until another crew come. They give him adrenaline and for the first time in about 30 mins he' breathing on his own all be it not very good! They get him in the ambulance and I go with the fast car response woman to a&e. After about 20 mins of being in there I get called into a room to be told he died again in the ambulance and he's been rushed up to iccu. Another 40 mins or so they take us up to be told they have gave him drugs to put him under and is ventilated to help him breath. Doctor says come back tomorrow and we will know more, so me and mam go home (around 3.30am) Wednesday comes and my brothers come up from Kent and we go in to see him. Not a good sight as he's having some sort of fitting thing every few seconds. Doctor takes us down to a room and says well sorry but it looks like he's got massive brain damage from lack of oxygen but they won' know more till 24hrs when they take him off the drugs and try and wake him up... now Thursday and we get there for 12 and doctor says they stopped the drugs and he didn' respond so what do you want to do!!!! It's never a question i thought i would be asked so we said he would never want to be alive as a vegetable so turn it off. Fuck me it was the worst thing I've ever seen someone you love die infront of you!!!! Heart breaking is not the word. I feel like shit for bringing him back and putting him through 48thr of hell.. I just can' stop seeing him on the floor...sorry to go on but I need to tell someone.
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None of us really know what to do in these situations, not even the experts.
 
You did the right thing at every turn. Your family got the chance to say goodbye, and even if your Dad was not responding to the things that were said, I strongly believe he would have been feeling and sharing your farewells. That was the gift you gave him in his final hours.
Sorry for the loss of a man that was obviously much loved. RIP.
 
f***ing hell mate dont really know what to say but sorry for your loss.

At least you were there to help and ensure the rest of your family had the chance to say goodbye and for that you are a f***ing hero.
 
offshore said:
Tuesday night mam rings to say dad's fell over in the house again ( Parkinsons) only to find him dead on the floor 5 mins after the call. So instinct kicks in and I start working on him as I tell her to ring an ambulance. So I continue for about 10 minutes and I get a response all be it a small one a response. I continue till the ambulance crew turned up. They take over and I still have to do cpr until another crew come. They give him adrenaline and for the first time in about 30 mins he' breathing on his own all be it not very good! They get him in the ambulance and I go with the fast car response woman to a&e. After about 20 mins of being in there I get called into a room to be told he died again in the ambulance and he's been rushed up to iccu. Another 40 mins or so they take us up to be told they have gave him drugs to put him under and is ventilated to help him breath. Doctor says come back tomorrow and we will know more, so me and mam go home (around 3.30am) Wednesday comes and my brothers come up from Kent and we go in to see him. Not a good sight as he's having some sort of fitting thing every few seconds. Doctor takes us down to a room and says well sorry but it looks like he's got massive brain damage from lack of oxygen but they won' know more till 24hrs when they take him off the drugs and try and wake him up... now Thursday and we get there for 12 and doctor says they stopped the drugs and he didn' respond so what do you want to do!!!! It's never a question i thought i would be asked so we said he would never want to be alive as a vegetable so turn it off. Fuck me it was the worst thing I've ever seen someone you love die infront of you!!!! Heart breaking is not the word. I feel like shit for bringing him back and putting him through 48thr of hell.. I just can' stop seeing him on the floor...sorry to go on but I need to tell someone.
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Pretty much word for Word what happened with my father in law. Your actions allowed the family to say goodbye.
 

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