Been a tough week

offshore said:
Tuesday night mam rings to say dad's fell over in the house again ( Parkinsons) only to find him dead on the floor 5 mins after the call. So instinct kicks in and I start working on him as I tell her to ring an ambulance. So I continue for about 10 minutes and I get a response all be it a small one a response. I continue till the ambulance crew turned up. They take over and I still have to do cpr until another crew come. They give him adrenaline and for the first time in about 30 mins he' breathing on his own all be it not very good! They get him in the ambulance and I go with the fast car response woman to a&e. After about 20 mins of being in there I get called into a room to be told he died again in the ambulance and he's been rushed up to iccu. Another 40 mins or so they take us up to be told they have gave him drugs to put him under and is ventilated to help him breath. Doctor says come back tomorrow and we will know more, so me and mam go home (around 3.30am) Wednesday comes and my brothers come up from Kent and we go in to see him. Not a good sight as he's having some sort of fitting thing every few seconds. Doctor takes us down to a room and says well sorry but it looks like he's got massive brain damage from lack of oxygen but they won' know more till 24hrs when they take him off the drugs and try and wake him up... now Thursday and we get there for 12 and doctor says they stopped the drugs and he didn' respond so what do you want to do!!!! It's never a question i thought i would be asked so we said he would never want to be alive as a vegetable so turn it off. Fuck me it was the worst thing I've ever seen someone you love die infront of you!!!! Heart breaking is not the word. I feel like shit for bringing him back and putting him through 48thr of hell.. I just can' stop seeing him on the floor...sorry to go on but I need to tell someone.
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You gave him a chance as well as the opportunity for family to say farewells. For that I’m sure your dad will be greatful. Take care. Look after your Mam.
 


offshore said:
Tuesday night mam rings to say dad's fell over in the house again ( Parkinsons) only to find him dead on the floor 5 mins after the call. So instinct kicks in and I start working on him as I tell her to ring an ambulance. So I continue for about 10 minutes and I get a response all be it a small one a response. I continue till the ambulance crew turned up. They take over and I still have to do cpr until another crew come. They give him adrenaline and for the first time in about 30 mins he' breathing on his own all be it not very good! They get him in the ambulance and I go with the fast car response woman to a&e. After about 20 mins of being in there I get called into a room to be told he died again in the ambulance and he's been rushed up to iccu. Another 40 mins or so they take us up to be told they have gave him drugs to put him under and is ventilated to help him breath. Doctor says come back tomorrow and we will know more, so me and mam go home (around 3.30am) Wednesday comes and my brothers come up from Kent and we go in to see him. Not a good sight as he's having some sort of fitting thing every few seconds. Doctor takes us down to a room and says well sorry but it looks like he's got massive brain damage from lack of oxygen but they won' know more till 24hrs when they take him off the drugs and try and wake him up... now Thursday and we get there for 12 and doctor says they stopped the drugs and he didn' respond so what do you want to do!!!! It's never a question i thought i would be asked so we said he would never want to be alive as a vegetable so turn it off. Fuck me it was the worst thing I've ever seen someone you love die infront of you!!!! Heart breaking is not the word. I feel like shit for bringing him back and putting him through 48thr of hell.. I just can' stop seeing him on the floor...sorry to go on but I need to tell someone.
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God bless you mate, there is no right and wrong thing to do, just what feels right, and you did exactly that. Must have been so hard for you all, but never, ever, doubt what you did. You gave your dad a chance, and as much love has you had to offer.
 
Sorry for your lose , I went through similar with my dad not nice at all. Hang in there and keep your chin up mate, it’ll get easier in time.keep your family and friends around you and think of the good times.
 
That's a fantastic thing you did there. It's not easy keeping a clear head and working on a loved one to keep them alive. That action bought a little more time so your whole family could say goodbye properly. I really admire you for doing that. Focus on all the good times and happy memories you have of him and allow seeing him on the floor to fade away. It will get better in time, I promise.

Loads of love and hugs to your family xx
 
offshore said:
Tuesday night mam rings to say dad's fell over in the house again ( Parkinsons) only to find him dead on the floor 5 mins after the call. So instinct kicks in and I start working on him as I tell her to ring an ambulance. So I continue for about 10 minutes and I get a response all be it a small one a response. I continue till the ambulance crew turned up. They take over and I still have to do cpr until another crew come. They give him adrenaline and for the first time in about 30 mins he' breathing on his own all be it not very good! They get him in the ambulance and I go with the fast car response woman to a&e. After about 20 mins of being in there I get called into a room to be told he died again in the ambulance and he's been rushed up to iccu. Another 40 mins or so they take us up to be told they have gave him drugs to put him under and is ventilated to help him breath. Doctor says come back tomorrow and we will know more, so me and mam go home (around 3.30am) Wednesday comes and my brothers come up from Kent and we go in to see him. Not a good sight as he's having some sort of fitting thing every few seconds. Doctor takes us down to a room and says well sorry but it looks like he's got massive brain damage from lack of oxygen but they won' know more till 24hrs when they take him off the drugs and try and wake him up... now Thursday and we get there for 12 and doctor says they stopped the drugs and he didn' respond so what do you want to do!!!! It's never a question i thought i would be asked so we said he would never want to be alive as a vegetable so turn it off. Fuck me it was the worst thing I've ever seen someone you love die infront of you!!!! Heart breaking is not the word. I feel like shit for bringing him back and putting him through 48thr of hell.. I just can' stop seeing him on the floor...sorry to go on but I need to tell someone.
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You did all the right things. Your Dad would be proud that you tried and then made the right decision for him and not for you.

Sorry about your loss.
 
offshore said:
Tuesday night mam rings to say dad's fell over in the house again ( Parkinsons) only to find him dead on the floor 5 mins after the call. So instinct kicks in and I start working on him as I tell her to ring an ambulance. So I continue for about 10 minutes and I get a response all be it a small one a response. I continue till the ambulance crew turned up. They take over and I still have to do cpr until another crew come. They give him adrenaline and for the first time in about 30 mins he' breathing on his own all be it not very good! They get him in the ambulance and I go with the fast car response woman to a&e. After about 20 mins of being in there I get called into a room to be told he died again in the ambulance and he's been rushed up to iccu. Another 40 mins or so they take us up to be told they have gave him drugs to put him under and is ventilated to help him breath. Doctor says come back tomorrow and we will know more, so me and mam go home (around 3.30am) Wednesday comes and my brothers come up from Kent and we go in to see him. Not a good sight as he's having some sort of fitting thing every few seconds. Doctor takes us down to a room and says well sorry but it looks like he's got massive brain damage from lack of oxygen but they won' know more till 24hrs when they take him off the drugs and try and wake him up... now Thursday and we get there for 12 and doctor says they stopped the drugs and he didn' respond so what do you want to do!!!! It's never a question i thought i would be asked so we said he would never want to be alive as a vegetable so turn it off. Fuck me it was the worst thing I've ever seen someone you love die infront of you!!!! Heart breaking is not the word. I feel like shit for bringing him back and putting him through 48thr of hell.. I just can' stop seeing him on the floor...sorry to go on but I need to tell someone.
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Sympathies pal, it's never easy losing a parent but honestly if that was your instincts to work on him and try then it can't have been the wrong thing to do
 
I don't know you from Adam but felt proud reading that opening post so there's no way you should be feeling bad about the CPR etc. Cherish the happy memories and find solace in that you couldn't have done more.
 
Really sorry to hear this. You did just what everyone hopes they would do in fighting to save someone you love. He would have done the same. So try not to beat yourself up about it. And you did give others the chance to say goodbye. That will be invaluable to them. You did right. Take care.
 
offshore said:
Tuesday night mam rings to say dad's fell over in the house again ( Parkinsons) only to find him dead on the floor 5 mins after the call. So instinct kicks in and I start working on him as I tell her to ring an ambulance. So I continue for about 10 minutes and I get a response all be it a small one a response. I continue till the ambulance crew turned up. They take over and I still have to do cpr until another crew come. They give him adrenaline and for the first time in about 30 mins he' breathing on his own all be it not very good! They get him in the ambulance and I go with the fast car response woman to a&e. After about 20 mins of being in there I get called into a room to be told he died again in the ambulance and he's been rushed up to iccu. Another 40 mins or so they take us up to be told they have gave him drugs to put him under and is ventilated to help him breath. Doctor says come back tomorrow and we will know more, so me and mam go home (around 3.30am) Wednesday comes and my brothers come up from Kent and we go in to see him. Not a good sight as he's having some sort of fitting thing every few seconds. Doctor takes us down to a room and says well sorry but it looks like he's got massive brain damage from lack of oxygen but they won' know more till 24hrs when they take him off the drugs and try and wake him up... now Thursday and we get there for 12 and doctor says they stopped the drugs and he didn' respond so what do you want to do!!!! It's never a question i thought i would be asked so we said he would never want to be alive as a vegetable so turn it off. Fuck me it was the worst thing I've ever seen someone you love die infront of you!!!! Heart breaking is not the word. I feel like shit for bringing him back and putting him through 48thr of hell.. I just can' stop seeing him on the floor...sorry to go on but I need to tell someone.
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Don't beat yourself up marra you done what came natural and what we'd all do.
Really sorry for your loss
 
Sorry for your loss mate, that's awful. You did the right thing, even though there'll be all sorts of emotions going through your head.
 
I was there when my Mam died. (They took her off the machine) and all her kids were in the room with her. It was quite a thing to be there when she went.
It sounds like your actions allowed your siblings to be there when he went and he didn't suffer as he was unconscious after the incident. It was traumatic what you went through but you should see it in a positive light. You gave you dad a chance, well done sir.
 

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