Are lies always a bad thing?



Basically as some of you may have seen on another thread, we had to have our Labrador put to sleep suddenly last Sunday. Very very traumatic experience, and I know it is part and parcel of owning pets. What makes it ten times worse is we rang the vets on the Tuesday to arrange her individual cremation and to pick out her urn etc etc. We were told on the night to ring before the following Friday so she could be picked up and returned to us this week. I received a phone call last Wednesday and told she had been placed in a "wrong coloured bag" and was therefore taken on the Monday and had a communal cremation the next day (basically along with road kill) and we cannot obviously get her ashes returned to us. All I can imagine is she has just been dumped in a bin or put in a landfill. Absolutely f***ing finished me off if i'm being honest.

Was talking to the wife last night, and basically cannot understand why the vets told us, they could have just got in touch with pet crematorium, explained situation and had them send out an urn. We'd have been none the wiser, and would not have had the extra stress not getting her ashes back has caused.
If they hadn't said anything and you had found out, you would have been fuming.
 
No

Thank fck

I'm nee farmhand, I'm not used to horses heeds flying round fields spraying blood all over

I'd have been nee good

😱

Reminds me of a story of when the Mrs was young and they put the tortoise in the cupboard to hibernate only for it's head to fall off when they got it back out again.
They had watched Blue Peter and saw them putting theirs away but they found out afterwards theirs wasn't the hibernating type.
 
I think it’s been covered, it would be unethical and inconceivable that two separate organisations would lie to protect one or the other.

You should create somewhere or something special to remember it by, as a way of finding some comfort. For example a bench, or plant a tree.

On a side note, I noticed there was a pet graveyard at Jesmond Dene Park.
I think those cushions with its picture on is a good idea.
 
I'm almost completely incapable of lying.

Even if its a totally minor thing it just eats away at me. Can't decide if its weakness or a positive character trait.

I think I could massage the truth to a degree. E.g. to protect a young child, if I had one.

In your situation they probably thought they were doing the right thing. Damned if they do damned if they don't.
Don’t you lie to yourself every day though?

You’re an impostor at work and at life in general iirc.
 
Reminds me of a story of when the Mrs was young and they put the tortoise in the cupboard to hibernate only for it's head to fall off when they got it back out again.
They had watched Blue Peter and saw them putting theirs away but they found out afterwards theirs wasn't the hibernating type.

Fuckin hell. :lol:
 
I was on holiday with my 12 year old couple of years back and his mother rang me to tell my my lads grandad was dying in hospital and wouldn't make it to see him get back. My lad knew he was ill and had to keep telling him his grandad would be there when he got back. Had a call on the second last day to say he'd died but not to tell my lad as the mother wanted to tell him. I had to keep saying it was all OK even tho I knew the heartache that was coming to my boy. In hindsight I'd have preferred her not to have told me anything then I wouldn't have had to lie to my son. I wish I'd said now so he knew and was ready.
 
Basically as some of you may have seen on another thread, we had to have our Labrador put to sleep suddenly last Sunday. Very very traumatic experience, and I know it is part and parcel of owning pets. What makes it ten times worse is we rang the vets on the Tuesday to arrange her individual cremation and to pick out her urn etc etc. We were told on the night to ring before the following Friday so she could be picked up and returned to us this week. I received a phone call last Wednesday and told she had been placed in a "wrong coloured bag" and was therefore taken on the Monday and had a communal cremation the next day (basically along with road kill) and we cannot obviously get her ashes returned to us. All I can imagine is she has just been dumped in a bin or put in a landfill. Absolutely f***ing finished me off if i'm being honest.

Was talking to the wife last night, and basically cannot understand why the vets told us, they could have just got in touch with pet crematorium, explained situation and had them send out an urn. We'd have been none the wiser, and would not have had the extra stress not getting her ashes back has caused.
Did they charge you extra for the individual cremation? If so, are they refunding you?
 
Did they charge you extra for the individual cremation? If so, are they refunding you?

Yep paid in advance. They were meant to be in contact yesterday regarding refund. They also offered some compensation but not interested in making money from her death.
 
Yep paid in advance. They were meant to be in contact yesterday regarding refund. They also offered some compensation but not interested in making money from her death.
I suppose they had to tell you then otherwise it could have been seen as fraudulent behaviour

Still, doesn't make it any less damaging for you all.
 
Yep paid in advance. They were meant to be in contact yesterday regarding refund. They also offered some compensation but not interested in making money from her death.
I understand you don't want to profit but this is quite a distressing fuck up. Get the compensation and use it to have a painting of her ( assuming you have photos) or something done to remember her by or buy a tree to plant in a spot you all loved instead. Sorry for your loss and extra distress caused by this.
 
I suppose they had to tell you then otherwise it could have been seen as fraudulent behaviour

Still, doesn't make it any less damaging for you all.

It's hideous mate, woman admitted on phone last week it has happened at the gateshead branch before, so clearly they haven't acted to make sure it doesn't happen again. Literally cannot get the fact she could be in a bin out of my head. Feel like I've totally failed her, and not afraid to admit she was my best mate in the world, always there when I needed her.
 

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