Come Christmas time there is always someone who wants to play charades at the family dinner –usually it is my mother. It seems that she has sneaked into the SAFC dressing room and is doing something similar there. So last Saturday it was Stew’s turn – take penalty, stutter in run up and then do soft shot within easy reach of the goalie – got that straight away – Jeff Whitley in the play off shoot out. Continuing the theme on Tuesday the team as a whole pulled out their slip of paper and acted out: come from behind, concede last minute goal from corner, lost at penalties – absolutely anyone would get that as the play-off semi against Palace.
The hero of the night was of course young Brown. I must admit I’m somewhat dubious as to whether he should have been playing for us. His punishment was on the lighter end of what I think he should have had. I know the “thin end of the wedge” is an overused expression but remember 5 years ago that lot up the road only had a similarly aged Dyer acting the fool in nightclubs and look at the human scum they know have to pretend are heroes. Nevertheless, unlike the mags, our club has taken action so let’s hope it has the right effect and we can move on. Certainly on a purely footballing level Brown had an impressive game, often single-handedly holding the attack and so it was great that he got his two goals. With Bridges now in, Kyle maybe back for the new year, Elliott looking like a super-hero and Stew scoring goals the front is suddenly looking pretty good.
The formation generally was interesting. First I can tell you who were in fixed positions – Myrhe in goal actually had a canny game despite conceding three. Lynch at right back was OK. Unfortunately that meant Dazza had to go over to left back and he certainly isn’t a left back. Of course now he’s off to do unspeakable things to sheep. I think a round of applause is in order here. Caldwell was captain and was the biggest worry – he had looked flappy at the beginning of the season but seemed to have sorted out his partnership with Breen over the last few games. Paired with Collins, who had looked good alongside Breen, he was back to Captain Flappy. Hopefully this was just a one-off and he’ll be back to looking solid against dirty Leeeds.
Clark was playing in central midfield and did a decent enough job without suggesting we should be fighting tooth and nail to keep him. Brown obviously was up-front.
The rest were what pundits on telly call “fluid”, particularly in the first half. Lawrence was on the wing but switched fairly regularly between right and left. Oster spent some of his time up front but would drop down to the wings and sometimes even central midfield. Leadbitter and Tubby swapped between the wing and centre almost move by move. It was all actually quite exciting to watch – at least in a match where you didn’t feel an enormous amount of pressure. I remember being impressed by Mick Buxton who tried to sort out the post-Butcher shambles by adopting “zonal play”, where every player stuck to his allotted zone. We suddenly were very disciplined and results improved. Unfortunately it made us highly predictable and teams turned us over. Eventually even me and Buxton realised it was crap and he allowed the players to play with a bit more freedom.
I guess the noticeable thing was that, while Tubby was OK, he certainly didn’t sparkle. In a game like this he should be making us all realise what we are missing. To be honest he just didn’t. I imagine he’ll be off which is sad. The lad has some tremendous ability but you have to be able to influence a game throughout the match and, based on this, he just doesn’t do that enough. It was noticeable how much more influential Whitehead looked when he came on.
What else can I tell you given how late this report is? I suppose the main thing is Elliott. He cam on fairly late but still managed to push their defence back about 10 yards. He really is looking a great buy – one of the most complete strikers I’ve seen in a red and white shirt for a long time. Ironically I think the last time I was so excited about a striker was over a young Mickey Bridges. I was pleased he got a goal.
So overall some good performances and not too bad a performance except for the flapping in defence. It would have been nice to have gone through to the next round because these sort of games are useful to get some of the squad players a decent run out. I don’t know for certain but looking at their shirt numbers it seemed as though Crewe were playing pretty much a full-strength championship side so 2-2 after 90 minutes is not too bad at all. Off to Leeds tonight and hopefully a tighter performance at the back but just as many goals up front.
Finally I am getting complaints from the post-room at the Ready to Go headquarters about the amount of fan mail I’m receiving. I’d like to apologise for not replying to you all individually but I never actually bother reading any of the letters. However, my PA who does read them, because it is her job, tells me there is a debate raging as to whether I blither on too much in these reports about the trip to the match rather than concentrating on the football. As a way of resolving this you can send text messages to 85058. If you’d like me to continue the blithering text “Yes please. I am always fascinated to know if you had a jammy dodger with your coffee while stuck in traffic at the M18/A1(M) interchange”. If you’d like me to pack in and make match reports, well reports of the match then text “For god’s sake shut up. Driving up and down the nation’s motorways might be boring but it is as nothing compared to reading about it”. Texts cost the GDP of a small African nation for the first three seconds and then successive generations of your descendants bonded into slavery for each five seconds thereafter. This might seem a little expensive but I think you’ll agree is is good value compared to the Orange man of the match.
