Most Embarrassing Moment of My life

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When I was about 18 I had a thing for a lass that worked as a teller at Spennymoor TSB. I always hoped I’d get her counter when I did any banking.

One winters night after work my dream came true. Not only was she serving me but she kept glancing up with ‘that look’, she was fascinated, I knew I was in with a shout. I decided to play it cool but left the bank feeling great. I jumped in the car and glanced in the mirror as I started it up. I had a massive snot stuck right on the end of my nose.
 
Group of us lads cycling in France . Went into this town and were all stood looking y in a shop window. I decides to let rip with a right fart and shout whoho! , sounded like a pirate sliding down a sail with a cutless. Hadn't noticed this French wife walk up and stand directly behind me trying to look over my shoulder. I think she over reacted personally .
Probably more embarrassing things have happened but that's just come back to me .
 
When I was a teenager our computer was in the same room as my mams cross trainer. One afternoon I was sat furiously tugging away. Then all of a sudden my mam opens the door. I'm sat there, trousers round my ankles, porn on the screen and cock in hand.

She says "What are you doing?"

I panicked and responded "I've got an itchy leg." Scratched my leg, knocked the monitor off, pulled my pants up and headed to my room.

I envy the teenagers of today with their laptops and tablets. They have no idea how hard it was for my generation to sneak wanks in. It often had to be planned with military precision. That fateful afternoon I didn't plan and paid the ultimate price.
 
When I was a teenager our computer was in the same room as my mams cross trainer. One afternoon I was sat furiously tugging away. Then all of a sudden my mam opens the door. I'm sat there, trousers round my ankles, porn on the screen and cock in hand.

She says "What are you doing?"

I panicked and responded "I've got an itchy leg." Scratched my leg, knocked the monitor off, pulled my pants up and headed to my room.

I envy the teenagers of today with their laptops and tablets. They have no idea how hard it was for my generation to sneak wanks in. It often had to be planned with military precision. That fateful afternoon I didn't plan and paid the ultimate price.

And I bet it was with a dial up connection.
The fuckers have never had it so good.

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Great. We've now seen his giblets more recently than he will have done.
 
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