Had to have my dog put to sleep yesterday

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KEV_SAFC_FTM

KEV_SAFC_FTM

Striker
Firstly, I'll apologise in advance for this. I'm going to spout off and write war and peace and I realise it's 'only a dog' and no-one really cares but I'm writing this with tears rolling down my face and I need to do it. In typical SMB style, I expect a few 'Man the fuck ups' but I don't care.

Anyhow, I had to put my dog, Jess, to sleep yesterday. She had an agressive form of cancer and had lost 6kg in two months. It was truly the most horrendous and emotionally draining experience of my life. Although the 'procedure' went as well as it could, I don't think I'd prepared mentally for what it would entail. I'll admit I'm struggling to cope with the enormity of it at the minute. I feel hollow and I'm crying all the time, despite never being emotional normally (Christ, I can't remember the last time I did cry). Little things around the house aren't happening any more because of her absence and the house feels lost.

I know this is a cliche but Jess was like a kid to us. My wife and I struggled to conceive for years so decided to get a dog instead. We got her from the kennels aged about 1, despite written comments that she was greedy. We'd visited the kennels about four times and each time her eyes were sparkling and tail was wagging. Call it fate, but we had to have her. My son was born a couple of years later and he has been since diagnosed with autism. The dog had a sense of when my son was feeling low or had a meltdown and could settle him down with her presence. She was always in the middle of us, wanting cuddles, just a proper soft people's dog and never a hint of aggression. Yet she hated other dogs and barked incessantly at them on walks.

I'm feeling every emotion going. Guilt, anger, shock, lack of appetite and lack of get up and go. Does it get any easier and when? Because this is f***ing horrible.
 
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KEV_SAFC_FTM said:
Firstly, I'll apologise in advance for this. I'm going to spout off and write war and peace and I realise it's 'only a dog' and no-one really cares but I'm writing this with tears rolling down my face and I need to do it. In typical SMB style, I expect a few 'Man the fuck ups' but I don't care.

Anyhow, I had to put my dog, Jess, to sleep yesterday. She had an agressive form of cancer and had lost 6kg in two months. It was truly the most horrendous and emotionally draining experience of my life. Although the 'procedure' went as well as it could, I don't think I'd prepared mentally for what it would entail. I'll admit I'm struggling to cope with the enormity of it at the minute. I feel hollow and I'm crying all the time, despite never being emotional normally (Christ, I can't remember the last time I did cry). Little things around the house aren't happening any more because of her absence and the house feels lost.

I know this is a cliche but Jess was like a kid to us. My wife and I struggled to conceive for years so decided to get a dog instead. We got her from the kennels aged about 1, despite written comments that she was greedy. We'd visited the kennels about four times and each time her eyes were sparkling and tail was wagging. Call it fate, but we had to have her. My son was born a couple of years later and he has been since diagnosed with autism. The dog had a sense of when my son was feeling low or had a meltdown and could settle him down with her presence. She was always in the middle of us, wanting cuddles, just a proper soft people's dog and never a hint of aggression. Yet she hated other dogs and barked incessantly at them on walks.

I'm feeling every emotion going. Guilt, anger, shock, lack of appetite and lack of get up and go. Does it get any easier and when? Because this is f***ing horrible.
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No need for guilt - you have given her a wonderful life and made a brave choice for her at the end
As for the rest - time will ease your grief...and Dogs are part of the family
Hopefully your son manages her absence OK
 
Sorry to hear that mate. Don't feel guilty, she was a huge part of your family life and losing her won't be something you can shrug off easily.

As has already been said, it gets easier with time but you shouldn't feel obliged to accelerate your mourning, it's your dog and you're entitled to feel exactly how you want.
 
time the greatest healer , you getting another . dreading this one of mine going but as time goes on I'm accepting one day its going up to him the sky. but had old camcorder out & found clips of old dog & how we clung on to it at end, blind (went mental on nov 5th) & not eating food somedays.
 
KEV_SAFC_FTM said:
Firstly, I'll apologise in advance for this. I'm going to spout off and write war and peace and I realise it's 'only a dog' and no-one really cares but I'm writing this with tears rolling down my face and I need to do it. In typical SMB style, I expect a few 'Man the fuck ups' but I don't care.

Anyhow, I had to put my dog, Jess, to sleep yesterday. She had an agressive form of cancer and had lost 6kg in two months. It was truly the most horrendous and emotionally draining experience of my life. Although the 'procedure' went as well as it could, I don't think I'd prepared mentally for what it would entail. I'll admit I'm struggling to cope with the enormity of it at the minute. I feel hollow and I'm crying all the time, despite never being emotional normally (Christ, I can't remember the last time I did cry). Little things around the house aren't happening any more because of her absence and the house feels lost.

I know this is a cliche but Jess was like a kid to us. My wife and I struggled to conceive for years so decided to get a dog instead. We got her from the kennels aged about 1, despite written comments that she was greedy. We'd visited the kennels about four times and each time her eyes were sparkling and tail was wagging. Call it fate, but we had to have her. My son was born a couple of years later and he has been since diagnosed with autism. The dog had a sense of when my son was feeling low or had a meltdown and could settle him down with her presence. She was always in the middle of us, wanting cuddles, just a proper soft people's dog and never a hint of aggression. Yet she hated other dogs and barked incessantly at them on walks.

I'm feeling every emotion going. Guilt, anger, shock, lack of appetite and lack of get up and go. Does it get any easier and when? Because this is f***ing horrible.
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sorry to hear that...lost ours in July and at least he went in his sleep which was bad enough.

Nowt to apologise or man up about. Dogs are class and a massive part of their owners lives.

Lots of kind words from people on here did actually help.

Believe it or not time does eventually start to heal...still miss ours terribly but now look back and think of the many good times and laughs we had than being devastated.
 
KEV_SAFC_FTM said:
Firstly, I'll apologise in advance for this. I'm going to spout off and write war and peace and I realise it's 'only a dog' and no-one really cares but I'm writing this with tears rolling down my face and I need to do it. In typical SMB style, I expect a few 'Man the fuck ups' but I don't care.

Anyhow, I had to put my dog, Jess, to sleep yesterday. She had an agressive form of cancer and had lost 6kg in two months. It was truly the most horrendous and emotionally draining experience of my life. Although the 'procedure' went as well as it could, I don't think I'd prepared mentally for what it would entail. I'll admit I'm struggling to cope with the enormity of it at the minute. I feel hollow and I'm crying all the time, despite never being emotional normally (Christ, I can't remember the last time I did cry). Little things around the house aren't happening any more because of her absence and the house feels lost.

I know this is a cliche but Jess was like a kid to us. My wife and I struggled to conceive for years so decided to get a dog instead. We got her from the kennels aged about 1, despite written comments that she was greedy. We'd visited the kennels about four times and each time her eyes were sparkling and tail was wagging. Call it fate, but we had to have her. My son was born a couple of years later and he has been since diagnosed with autism. The dog had a sense of when my son was feeling low or had a meltdown and could settle him down with her presence. She was always in the middle of us, wanting cuddles, just a proper soft people's dog and never a hint of aggression. Yet she hated other dogs and barked incessantly at them on walks.

I'm feeling every emotion going. Guilt, anger, shock, lack of appetite and lack of get up and go. Does it get any easier and when? Because this is f***ing horrible.
Click to expand...
You've done the right thing, Jess isn't in anymore pain and emember the good times you had.
 
KEV_SAFC_FTM said:
Firstly, I'll apologise in advance for this. I'm going to spout off and write war and peace and I realise it's 'only a dog' and no-one really cares but I'm writing this with tears rolling down my face and I need to do it. In typical SMB style, I expect a few 'Man the fuck ups' but I don't care.

Anyhow, I had to put my dog, Jess, to sleep yesterday. She had an agressive form of cancer and had lost 6kg in two months. It was truly the most horrendous and emotionally draining experience of my life. Although the 'procedure' went as well as it could, I don't think I'd prepared mentally for what it would entail. I'll admit I'm struggling to cope with the enormity of it at the minute. I feel hollow and I'm crying all the time, despite never being emotional normally (Christ, I can't remember the last time I did cry). Little things around the house aren't happening any more because of her absence and the house feels lost.

I know this is a cliche but Jess was like a kid to us. My wife and I struggled to conceive for years so decided to get a dog instead. We got her from the kennels aged about 1, despite written comments that she was greedy. We'd visited the kennels about four times and each time her eyes were sparkling and tail was wagging. Call it fate, but we had to have her. My son was born a couple of years later and he has been since diagnosed with autism. The dog had a sense of when my son was feeling low or had a meltdown and could settle him down with her presence. She was always in the middle of us, wanting cuddles, just a proper soft people's dog and never a hint of aggression. Yet she hated other dogs and barked incessantly at them on walks.

I'm feeling every emotion going. Guilt, anger, shock, lack of appetite and lack of get up and go. Does it get any easier and when? Because this is f***ing horrible.
Click to expand...
Take the time to grieve. All of this emotion just shows how much joy jess brought over the years. Have a think and if it's right for you and the time is right, get another dog. Rip jess.
 
So sorry to hear that. Jess sounds like she had a fabulous life and enjoyed every minute of it with you.

She's not "only a dog" - she was much loved member of your family and brought all of you great love and joy. You need time to grieve in the same way as when a human passes away. She will be a massive loss and it will get easier in time. I'm dog crackers and filling up writing this, so don't have any shame in crying or feeling emotional. It's natural. Take care of yourself and your family xx
 
KEV_SAFC_FTM said:
Firstly, I'll apologise in advance for this. I'm going to spout off and write war and peace and I realise it's 'only a dog' and no-one really cares but I'm writing this with tears rolling down my face and I need to do it. In typical SMB style, I expect a few 'Man the fuck ups' but I don't care.

Anyhow, I had to put my dog, Jess, to sleep yesterday. She had an agressive form of cancer and had lost 6kg in two months. It was truly the most horrendous and emotionally draining experience of my life. Although the 'procedure' went as well as it could, I don't think I'd prepared mentally for what it would entail. I'll admit I'm struggling to cope with the enormity of it at the minute. I feel hollow and I'm crying all the time, despite never being emotional normally (Christ, I can't remember the last time I did cry). Little things around the house aren't happening any more because of her absence and the house feels lost.

I know this is a cliche but Jess was like a kid to us. My wife and I struggled to conceive for years so decided to get a dog instead. We got her from the kennels aged about 1, despite written comments that she was greedy. We'd visited the kennels about four times and each time her eyes were sparkling and tail was wagging. Call it fate, but we had to have her. My son was born a couple of years later and he has been since diagnosed with autism. The dog had a sense of when my son was feeling low or had a meltdown and could settle him down with her presence. She was always in the middle of us, wanting cuddles, just a proper soft people's dog and never a hint of aggression. Yet she hated other dogs and barked incessantly at them on walks.

I'm feeling every emotion going. Guilt, anger, shock, lack of appetite and lack of get up and go. Does it get any easier and when? Because this is f***ing horrible.
Click to expand...
Sorry to hear about your loss, dogs are awesome and play a huge part in our lives, heartbreaking when they go to the big kennel in the sky, never apologise for being upset about them.

Rip Jess:(
 
KEV_SAFC_FTM said:
Firstly, I'll apologise in advance for this. I'm going to spout off and write war and peace and I realise it's 'only a dog' and no-one really cares but I'm writing this with tears rolling down my face and I need to do it. In typical SMB style, I expect a few 'Man the fuck ups' but I don't care.

Anyhow, I had to put my dog, Jess, to sleep yesterday. She had an agressive form of cancer and had lost 6kg in two months. It was truly the most horrendous and emotionally draining experience of my life. Although the 'procedure' went as well as it could, I don't think I'd prepared mentally for what it would entail. I'll admit I'm struggling to cope with the enormity of it at the minute. I feel hollow and I'm crying all the time, despite never being emotional normally (Christ, I can't remember the last time I did cry). Little things around the house aren't happening any more because of her absence and the house feels lost.

I know this is a cliche but Jess was like a kid to us. My wife and I struggled to conceive for years so decided to get a dog instead. We got her from the kennels aged about 1, despite written comments that she was greedy. We'd visited the kennels about four times and each time her eyes were sparkling and tail was wagging. Call it fate, but we had to have her. My son was born a couple of years later and he has been since diagnosed with autism. The dog had a sense of when my son was feeling low or had a meltdown and could settle him down with her presence. She was always in the middle of us, wanting cuddles, just a proper soft people's dog and never a hint of aggression. Yet she hated other dogs and barked incessantly at them on walks.

I'm feeling every emotion going. Guilt, anger, shock, lack of appetite and lack of get up and go. Does it get any easier and when? Because this is f***ing horrible.
Click to expand...

GUILT? Have word with yourself man!

I don't know you, never met you, but just from your post I can tell that your dog was a well loved member of the family who had a good life.
You've nowt to feel guilty about.

We lost our Springer a few weeks ago (incidentally named Jess) and it was heartbreaking. She was fit and well then we came home to find she had had the cannine equivalent of a stroke and had to be put to sleep. It was a total bolt out of the blue as we thought she had years left. I still expect her to come running whenever I get in from work and all the other things she used to do.
A way of helping to cope for me and this really works, is thinking to myself "could she realistically of had a better life?" She really couldn't of, as she was treat better than any of us and allways happy. I've no doubt your dog had the same.
I still miss her terribly but unfortunately that's one of the downsides you have to accept as a pet owner. It really is the same as losing one of the family as effectively that's what they are.
Strangely enough our Jess also loved people but wouldn't entertain other dogs, must be in the name!

Chin up, it gets easier mate.
 
KEV_SAFC_FTM said:
Firstly, I'll apologise in advance for this. I'm going to spout off and write war and peace and I realise it's 'only a dog' and no-one really cares but I'm writing this with tears rolling down my face and I need to do it. In typical SMB style, I expect a few 'Man the fuck ups' but I don't care.

Anyhow, I had to put my dog, Jess, to sleep yesterday. She had an agressive form of cancer and had lost 6kg in two months. It was truly the most horrendous and emotionally draining experience of my life. Although the 'procedure' went as well as it could, I don't think I'd prepared mentally for what it would entail. I'll admit I'm struggling to cope with the enormity of it at the minute. I feel hollow and I'm crying all the time, despite never being emotional normally (Christ, I can't remember the last time I did cry). Little things around the house aren't happening any more because of her absence and the house feels lost.

I know this is a cliche but Jess was like a kid to us. My wife and I struggled to conceive for years so decided to get a dog instead. We got her from the kennels aged about 1, despite written comments that she was greedy. We'd visited the kennels about four times and each time her eyes were sparkling and tail was wagging. Call it fate, but we had to have her. My son was born a couple of years later and he has been since diagnosed with autism. The dog had a sense of when my son was feeling low or had a meltdown and could settle him down with her presence. She was always in the middle of us, wanting cuddles, just a proper soft people's dog and never a hint of aggression. Yet she hated other dogs and barked incessantly at them on walks.

I'm feeling every emotion going. Guilt, anger, shock, lack of appetite and lack of get up and go. Does it get any easier and when? Because this is f***ing horrible.
Click to expand...

Having had to have one of our cats put to sleep, I can relate that it's one of the hardest things you have to do, but it's what's best for the animal.
You wouldn't want them to be in any more pain and it wouldn't be right to keep them alive just to spare you the pain of losing them.
It's an absolutely horrible experience but deep down you know it's the right thing to do.
It's been quite a few years now since Nero died, but I still miss him.

They are part of the family. You see them every day. I remember feeling awful because I cried more when the cat died than one of my great aunties. But that's the thing, it's not that you love them more/less, but when they're a part of your daily life, the hole they leave when they're gone is massive.

In this case, time is indeed a great healer. Just be happy and grateful that she was part of your lives and how much better you made her life by being part of yours.
 
Sitting reading this at work, filling up.

We had to say goodbye to our lovely German Shepherd - only 9 years old - on July 1st this year. Two days before we flew out on holiday - vet said there was nothing he could do for her and we didn't want to leave her with relatives who may have had to make the ultimate decision for her on our behalf. She didn't look or act ill, but had an inoperable (due to it's proximity to her heart and lungs) non-cancerous growth in her chest that was pressing on her windpipe and slowly choking her. Eventually, she couldn't lie down as it meant she couldn't breathe. The look of confusion on her face when she was forced to stand up to get a breath was heart-breaking.

It was the hardest decision of our lives, and the worst holiday of our lives.

She was a beautiful dog - in nature as well as appearance - we only ever heard her bark once in all the time we had her. We got her from a rescue centre and I honestly think that those dogs know and appreciate that they are getting a second chance with someone who really wants them.

I still miss her presence every day - the pre-work, early morning walks in the pissing rain, her lying in the most inappropriate spots and getting under our feet, and especially the absolute joy she expressed when you came home from work etc.

It gets easier, believe me, but it takes time. Just remember the good times and the love and happiness that you gave her and vice-versa.

RIP Jess (If you see a big, daft Shepherd named Keira knocking about up there, tell her Dad says hello).
 
Had to put mine to sleep on my birthday back in february (that's him in my avatar) one of the worst days of my life. We took him down Roker Beach- his favourite place- before taking him to the vets. The kids were off school and the wife left work so we could all be there. We were all in tears walking out the vets. There's a birthday I'll never forget! still miss him, the walks three times a day and him kidney beaning all over the place whenever you walked through the door. However, I don't miss the snoring at the bottom of the bed and his rancid farts.
 
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